In that sense it's kinda like foreplay or delayed gratification, not
exactly getting yours but in the ballpark.
I would agree it all comes back to numero uno fundamentally, which more
may be built upon. Not necessarily a dichotomy in that as some call it
(a paradox), but a balance of complement and conflict.
On 4/9/2010 12:56 AM, fiddler wrote:
We are social animals. In order to be social we must be both selfish
and empathetic. I selfishly want you to empathise with me and I want
to empathise with you in order to facilitate that. Well... I truly
suck at empathy, but this is true for most people and social animals.
We african apes show these characteristics more clearly than most
creatures, but I think that's due to ease and similarity in "reading"
our fellow apes.
On Apr 8, 9:37 pm, Don Johnson<[email protected]> wrote:
On Thu, Apr 8, 2010 at 9:25 AM, Matthijs<[email protected]> wrote:
What is selfish about empathizing with another person?
I don't know. What is the motivation of the empathizer? Is it to make the
person they are empathizing feel better? If so, why would they do this?
Perhaps because it makes them feel better about themselves in some way.
Perhaps because people appreciate it and praise them for it. Maybe it gives
them a reputation as a 'good person' and they like it. These are all
guesses but the ultimate goal, as always, is to make oneself feel better or
to improve social standing or some such.
dj
On Apr 5, 1:31 am, Don Johnson<[email protected]> wrote:
We're all basically selfish. We do what makes us feel good about
ourselves. What makes us feel good about ourselves is often mirrored in
how
we see others feel about us. So it pays to make your friends and family
love you. If you can.
dj
On Sat, Apr 3, 2010 at 12:19 PM, Matthijs<[email protected]>
wrote:
Back again with a dilemma.
For quite a while I speak with people and now and then we come to the
question: why do we do the things we do? Generally I come to 2 views.
We live to help other people, this is the motor behind all behaviour
(altruism). Or we nor live for ourself and all things we do are from a
self interest view, we give love to receive it (egoism). So I was
wondering how may I look at these views? Do I really only want to help
myself or only help myself.
Greetings,
Matthijs
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