Lu to Arlo:
I'm not talking about "being in love" or proof of such, I'm talking about
Basic things that would improve Quality of life; in depth pre-marital
counseling (in their particular religion, or not, as the case may be), no
one marries before they've dated 18 months, Parenting classes (using those
"baby-think-it-over" dolls like a lot of the school kids use now), classes
on budgeting - What I'm talking about is an A.A. (A.S.?) in Real Life. If
you pass the course, you can get Married, if not you'd have to settle for
something more like a civil union. Or maybe you'd only be allowed to get
engaged with an Associates degree, and would actually have to go on to get
your Masters in order to actually marry...
I understand that I am being very idealistic here, and how on earth would
all this be instituted, and would I want the GOVERNMENT in charge of this?!!
Andre:
Hi Lu and welcome to the forum. I am going to play Devil's Advocate or
rather Arsehole No1 here 'cos I am really wondering what you are after:
I suggest the folowing comprehensive Marriage Course:
Introduction:
Preliminaries:
Phase1: How well did you get on with your brothers/sisters (if appropriate)
How well have you treated your parents?
How well do you know yourself?
Do you know what love is?
Phase2: How to flirt.
Petting and heavy petting.
Falling in love.
How well do you know your lover?
Intermediate:
Phase1: Commitment/engagement (signs/signals/dangers/traps)
How well do the parents get along?
Compatibility:( race,colour,religion,politics,economic status,
your favourite TV show,literature, would you prefer to sleep
with the window open or closed (thank you Paul Simon).
Phase2: Quality wanking, oral sex, copulation and head aches (a histo-
rical overview...and how you fit in (or not)
High:
Phase 1 : Marriage its meaning and functions.
Children: their meaning and function.
P.E.T. workshops levels 1-20
First 5 years to be closely monitored on CCTV.
Any digression from codes of behaviour previously agreed to will result in
the presentation of a colour card system similar to soccerplayers: yellow is
warning (depending on foul committed party may have to re-sit part or all of
the above mentioned classes) red is immediate suspension of marriage. (the
counsellor assumes the role of one of the partners [gender appropriate] .
Recipient of the red card must watch behaviour of counsellor (with
partner) for a period of one whole year after which the lawbreaker may
resume the marriage role on 'P' plates (probationary trial).
Length of the course: 45 years
Developed by the Guy Smiley, Non Affiliate, Quality Marriage Foundation.
Lu, my question is: what do you want? Do you want certainty of Quality? You
will certainly get that as it can go anywhere. Do you want quality
certainty? I.e: perfect marriage, perfect kids, perfect world etc etc?...as
I used to say to my Chinese students: 'If you do not want to take any risks,
if you want certainty...stay in bed'.
Kind regards
Andre
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