Citing a lack of independent-board headquarters on the south side, the Minneapolis Board of Estimate and Taxation has announced plans to buy the Park Board maintenance depot by Lyndale Farmstead Park
"We don't want southsiders to feel insecure," explained Board of Estimate and Taxation member Wally Swan. "We've seen what an inferiority complex can do to the north side. But now that they have the Park Board headquarters, we know they are feeling pretty smug. Northeast has the school board, and downtown has City Hall. We decided our $5.1 million purchase price is an adequate salve for bruised southsiders. Plus, there is no better way to demonstrate the independence of independent boards than by dispersing them widely throughout the city." The Park Board, which currently has maintenance operations on the Lyndale Farmstead site, will move their equipment to their new Mississippi River headquarters. "We hear they have extra room," said Swan. Asked why the Board of Estimate - which has no heavy equipment - needed such a large site, Swan said the purchase would be an investment in open space for future generations. He also said potential rental income would reduce borrowing costs. He said negotiations have begun with neighborhood residents looking for a dog park. (This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual public policy, living or dead, is intentional. However, "Wally Swan" is a composite of public officials and not meant to represent the real, live Wally Swan.) David Brauer King Field Tells the truth in his day job _______________________________________ Minneapolis Issues Forum - A Civil City Civic Discussion - Mn E-Democracy Post messages to: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subscribe, Unsubscribe, Digest option, and more: http://e-democracy.org/mpls
