Thank you- I'm really glad someone can get something from this, Simon On 29 May 2011, at 13:18, Ann Light wrote:
> What a glorious lunchtime for me on the list, catching up with > > 'Park House' > http://www.vimeo.com/17226732 > > and > > 'Friday morning at the surgery' > http://edwardpicot.com/fridaymorning > > If you haven't followed these links, I can only suggest that you > do. So much > of life seems to be there in different ways on each. > > What a fabulous list. Thank you Simon, Edward ... and Michael. And > Ruth and > Marc. Happy BHWE. > > Ann > > -----Original Message----- > From: [email protected] > [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Michael > Szpakowski > Sent: 29 May 2011 11:27 > To: NetBehaviour for networked distributed creativity > Subject: Re: [NetBehaviour] a film called The Ship > > Hi Simon > I like this, in parts. It has moments of intense beauty and it > bursts with > ideas, some of which seem to me to work more successfully than others. > I've been looking at some of your other work - in particular > > 'Park House' > http://www.vimeo.com/17226732 > and > > 'Big Moth' > http://www.vimeo.com/17198361 > > which seem to me to be quite incontrovertibly triumphant. I think what > underpins this success for me is that these pieces are both looser > & wilder > in their construction and more intense in their content. In 'The > Ship' the > quasi-narrative form means less poetry per minute plus all the > traps of > unevenness (and to some extent cliche) that using performers brings. > Frankly, I'm not sure how much is gained by the "narrative" thread > - it is > still fairly opaque and I wouldn't have guessed, without your gloss > on the > vimeo page, that it is "A film about an artist with a dilemma. A > poetic take > on split personality and narrative breakdown." > What seems to me makes for more powerful and unified work in the > other two > is that the glue is your beautiful writing and (not to be > underestimated) > extraordinarily charismatic speaking voice, combined with a superb > visual > sense... they are *precisely* audio visual lyric poems... > I can see that this could feel unsustainable over a greater length, > like > that of 'The Ship' - the lyric approach could begin to feel > overcooked over > more than about three minutes (although this never stopped Brakhage). > I wonder whether the longer work needs more "scaffolding" - longer > rehearsal > periods, more precise scripting, even , dare I say, storyboarding > ( although > I can see the huge amount of work that went into it as it stands). > warmest wishes > michael > > > --- On Thu, 5/26/11, Simon Mclennan <[email protected]> wrote: > >> From: Simon Mclennan <[email protected]> >> Subject: [NetBehaviour] a film called The Ship >> To: "NetBehaviour for networked distributed creativity" > <[email protected]> >> Date: Thursday, May 26, 2011, 5:42 PM >> A film I made - I would be interested >> in feedback from anyone on net >> behaviour. Its about 6 minutes long and follows a sort of >> narrative. >> >> http://www.vimeo.com/17199370 >> >> Incidentally this film was accidentally stolen by thieves >> from my >> flat twice during editing- two separate times on two >> separate >> computers- now there's a chance for you. >> The first part is shot at Furtherfield Gallery, kindly lent >> to me for >> a couple of hours by Mark and Ruth some time ago. >> >> thanks, >> >> Simon >> >> _______________________________________________ >> NetBehaviour mailing list >> [email protected] >> http://www.netbehaviour.org/mailman/listinfo/netbehaviour >> > _______________________________________________ > NetBehaviour mailing list > [email protected] > http://www.netbehaviour.org/mailman/listinfo/netbehaviour > > _______________________________________________ > NetBehaviour mailing list > [email protected] > http://www.netbehaviour.org/mailman/listinfo/netbehaviour > _______________________________________________ NetBehaviour mailing list [email protected] http://www.netbehaviour.org/mailman/listinfo/netbehaviour
