Lucas, Thank you so much for this! For your courageous actions and for sharing them with us in a spirit of giving and curiosity!
This touched me and inspired me to action! I am now finally going to get my butt out into the public square and try something similar to what you have done. I am going to invite others to join me, and maybe, I will take a few kids along with me. *Listening resources & thoughts *for those who would like to explore this further: My belief in the power of listening was rekindled when I participated in a training in Seattle with a wonderful group that some of you may know, The Compassionate Listening Project. <http://www.compassionatelistening.org/> These folks do incredible work and have cultivated a deep and mindful practice in the art of listening. At this training I met another incredible woman who had started something in Seattle that is similar to what Lucas has done, which she calls *The Free Listening Project <http://www.freelisteningproject.com/> - *They go into public spaces with a silent invitation on their T-shirts and/or a sign: "*No advice, No judgment, No Interruptions...just Listening" *- I have wanted to do this ever since, but for some reason have not - thank you again for the inspiration Lucas! Imagine if there was a critical mass of people offering to listen, witness, hear and share our suffering and our empathy...... *Thich Nhat Hanh*, believes that practicing deep listening is the only way that we will achieve world peace, and that this deep listening begins with learning to listen to our own suffering with empathy. He advocates for an "army of listeners" to heal our suffering. *Listening for world peace *is described in this article: http://www.lionsroar.com/in-engaged-buddhism-peace-begins-with-you/ For some who may not be familiar, Thich Nhat Hanh is a Vietnamese Buddhist monk who was a leader in the peace movement during the Vietnam and a leader in a practice known as "Engaged Buddhism". I love that what you did, Lucas, mixes listening with the invitation for dialogue among 2+ people and that we are spreading open source "social technology" that is not owned by any "helping" organization, "evidenced-based" academic methodology, or "well-planned" government program :) My last thought - I hear the desire for this all over, for both listening and being heard, for talking about real things without the pall of needing to debate or convince, with the invitation to share anything in a space of respect, to tell stories....I was just at a community swap - clothes & stuff - and this guy was telling people about an idea that he had, telling it with self-ridicule & laughing it off. He wanted to have a* "crying, comforting" party* - OK, yes, that may come across as a little odd and off-putting, but in essence it is the same thing we are talking about here. His motivation, "people suffer, why suffer alone?" - yes! I suggested that he make the invitation a little broader and invite people to come and share their stories & listen to one another, or frame it in some way that invites people to go deep or vulnerable if they choose, which may include crying, but invited all feelings and reactions :) If he was really into the crying part, he could serve raw onion dip :P Thanks for listening! Tricia Chirumbole US: +1-571-232-0942 Skype: tricia.chirumbole On Thu, Mar 26, 2015 at 10:29 AM, Lucas Cioffi via OSList < [email protected]> wrote: > Hi All, > > This is cross-posted on the NCDD listserv, and I'm sharing it with the OS > List, because-- even though it's not about OST-- it's about opening space, > and I welcome your thoughts! > > I was partially inspired by Michael Herman's quote from four days ago: > >> "the other thing i do is never set out big circles in the breakout >> spaces. i set three chairs to mark each breakout space, with more chairs >> piled to the sides. the three chairs are pushed right together close, >> their front edges forming a closed triangle. set this way, they are >> impossible to use. the first person has to move them to whatever distance >> feels right to them. after three people come, everyone needs to move them >> to make room for others. in this way, i dictate nothing. they literally >> open the space at the center of each breakout group. i've done it this way >> every time since my first time, when i set big chairs and watched some >> small groups squirm in spaces that were too big for them." > > > I happen to live in Charlottesville, Virginia where a recent violent > arrest of a student and race-related protests have gotten some national > media attention. Over the past two days I tried an experiment in creating > pop-up civic space for dialogue. > > This is designed as an alternative to how Starbucks conducted its Race > Together initiative last week which has had mixed reviews. *I wrote up > my thoughts below and attached some photos so you can get a feel for the > experience.* > > My goals were to "bring dialogue to people" and to create a simple, > repeatable process that others might improve or replicate, even without > resources. > > This is not to detract from formal and well-resourced dialogue programs. > I believe there is also a vital need for public dialogue in the margins > like this when no resources are available. > > I'm wondering what your thoughts and suggestions are for improvement. > -- > Lucas Cioffi > Co-Founder, QiqoChat > Charlottesville, VA > 917-528-1831 > > > > > Note: The article and full size photos are here: > http://americantownhalls.org > > *The American Townhall on Anything* > Over the past few years, I've worked with a few volunteers to experiment > with different methods for having productive discussions on difficult > topics like politics. > > Our current effort is *The American Townhall on Anything*, a playful yet > important opportunity to connect with fellow Americans for meaningful > conversation. > > The goal for this experiment is to create "pop-up civic space" where > people can have productive political discussions. This effort is similar > to open source software; no one owns it, and anyone can build on it and > modify it to make it work for their community. > > There is no official organization making this happen. These are just > ideas that we hope will catch on, evolve, and adapt as they grow to have > greater impact. > > You are invited to take these ideas, improve them, and build on them. > Here's what we've learned so far: > > *Day 1, March 24th* > > With my dad visiting from out of town, I wanted to have some fun, meet > some people, and help him get the feel for the community. I've been > thinking about doing something like this for a few weeks now, and > (finally!) I had someone who would sit there with me so I don't look so > alone. Thanks, Pops! > > We took my four dining room chairs and walked them over to > Charlottesville's charming Downtown Pedestrian Mall. With some paper and > tape I put some signs on the back of the chairs such as the one you can > read above. > > Using indoor dining room chairs wasn't intentional (I didn't have any > other chairs), however they probably helped to catch people's attention > because they were both unusual and inviting. > > My father and I just started talking about topics that were important to > us. We had two open seats and people would read the signs and drop in to > join us for some conversation from time to time. > > Over the course of two hours, we met all types of great folks with > interesting stories to share. We talked about the weather. We talked > about race, religion, politics, and power. We connected in some surprising > and rewarding ways. > > One person walking by asked an intriguing question with a warm smile: "Is > this performance art?" My answer: "I don't know." Perhaps it is, or > perhaps it should be. I have to think about that. > > *Day 2, March 25th* > > On Day 2, I wanted to kick it up a notch. I wanted to bring our traveling > road show to the grounds of the University of Virginia where there has been > significant racial tension over the past week due to an arrest outside a > bar. > > We didn't go there to talk about any specific topic. We wanted to just > "open some space" and see what people wanted to talk about. This was an > experiment to test how students and university staff would react to an > opportunity to exercise their right to free speech. > > I was anxious, because I didn't know how this would be received. After > all, these are strangers sitting down to have some potentially difficult > conversations. I didn't want to create a space where someone would feel > uncomfortable, misunderstood, or disrespected. Fortunately everyone felt > comfortable, and we had some great conversations. > > We didn't state any ground rules. People simply defaulted to being > humane. Perhaps there should be ground rules. I don't know. > > On this second day, we were more effective in communicating what was > happening; we posted small paper signs 50 feet out in both directions > along the main walking path so that people had more time to understand what > was going on and that that they were absolutely invited to join the > conversation. Our simple handwritten signs were in color and said "FREE > SPEECH - Talk about anything." > > Sometimes when people would walk by, we would ask them jokingly, "Are you > here for the free speech?" People got a laugh out of that. > > Students were curious. The chairs filled up quickly. Several other > students took photographs and we heard some very positive comments as > people were passing by: "Great idea!" and "I'm headed to class, but how > long are you hear today?" and "Are you going to be here tomorrow too?" > > After 30 minutes, it started raining, so we packed up and went home. All > in all, we were able to quickly validate our hypothesis that people would > be receptive to this type of experiment on a college campus. > > I wanted to see whether the students would move the discussion to some > difficult topics on their own, but the rain cut us short. Given what I saw > today and given my experience participating in a formal > student-faculty-community dialogue programs at UVA last year, I expect all > participants would have dealt with difficult topics in a respectful and > productive way if they came up. > > *Next Steps* > > This was energizing and fun, and I'm not quite sure what happens next. > > I'm active in some online communities of dialogue facilitators, so I'm > going to share this story with some friends in the National Coalition for > Dialogue and Deliberation and elsewhere to see what they think. > > Given that the new Starbucks "Race Together" dialogue initiative has had > mixed results (many people did not want dialogue forced upon them), I'd > also like to (delicately) try a modified version of this inside experiment > a Starbucks. > > If I try something in a Starbucks over the next few days, it will be very > different-- it would be just a sign-- a silent invitation-- and people can > choose to sit down and join the conversation if they'd like. > > *What do you think?* > > Where do we go from here? Well, if I/you/we can create a simple, > repeatable process for opening "pop-up civic space" like this, then others > might do the same, and we might all surprise ourselves with what is > possible. There is certainly a need for more productive dialogue in our > country. > > Please do get in touch: [email protected] > > > _______________________________________________ > OSList mailing list > To post send emails to [email protected] > To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] > To subscribe or manage your subscription click below: > http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org > Past archives can be viewed here: > http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected] > >
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