----------------------------------------------------------- New Message on Pituitary Chat
----------------------------------------------------------- From: MinnieChat Message 6 in Discussion Joven, I am sorry to hear that you have been through with this illness. My husband and I had some rough spots in there too. Maybe a counselor would help. During the first leg of my illness, I really took things personal with the accusations from my husband. I think my husband was really fearful about my illness and the anxiety was as such he couldn't and/or really didn't know what to do. It is easier to push away, I guess. He told me once that he could only go "oh my, that's just so bad and oh my, I really understand," before his sympathy wick burned out. I realized that I couldn't change him, but I could change me. I began searching for answers in all kinds of self-help books, alternative therapies, vitamin programs, you name it. I tried going to church too, but I felt so overwhelmed with the negativity from the illness and the issues at home, I really didn't think Jesus was listening, or that he really cared. I too saw the strain in my kids' eyes. I really had built a wall, a stronghold of sorts, made with bricks filled with strife, anger, greed, selfishness, and more, all mortered up with cement made up of "what about me". When I really saw that in myself, I realized that my husband had done the same, and in survivial, so had my kids (to a degree). As we built our walls higher, we became more and more seperated. It's taken some real effort to break down those walls. One person can't do it alone. One thing that really helped me was journaling. Instead of journaling like a diary, I journaled each entry with "Dear God," I would start the journal with Yesterday, this and this happened... and would end the entries with a prayer or two, or three. I even would write about folks here, and work issues and people at work. One time, I decided to reread entries from months before, and I realized that prayers I had made, were being answered. It was more than coincidence. I couldn't see him, but he was there. He was really there. I couldn't see him, but he was answering my prayers, and even prayers I had written for people here on this board. The biggest thing I've had to work through is to learn to trust again. I was so hurt. It was hard to learn to talk again, and work through issues with my husband, but I think it really helped that I worked through alot of issues with pen and ink, a tattered journal, and a black book with Golden Letters. This other book about learning how to pray really helped me: To Busy Not to Pray, by Bill Hybels. If you like, I can send you my copy, free. It has taken a long time to bring those bricks down between me and my husband. We are making progress though. We had a disagreement a few nights ago. A few years ago, he wouldn't have spoken to me for weeks, nor I him. :Last week, we had our disagreement, and two hours later, we were talking and laughing, and everything was back to normal. I haven't been on the boards for a while. I just took a new job, and the transition from my old job and my new has been quite a journey. If there is anything I can do, including keeping you in my prayers, I will. Merry Christmas Minnie ----------------------------------------------------------- To stop getting this e-mail, or change how often it arrives, go to your E-mail Settings. http://groups.msn.com/PituitaryChat/_emailsettings.msnw Need help? If you've forgotten your password, please go to Passport Member Services. http://groups.msn.com/_passportredir.msnw?ppmprop=help For other questions or feedback, go to our Contact Us page. http://groups.msn.com/contact If you do not want to receive future e-mail from this MSN group, or if you received this message by mistake, please click the "Remove" link below. On the pre-addressed e-mail message that opens, simply click "Send". Your e-mail address will be deleted from this group's mailing list. mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
