RE: Kisa is gone, thank you all

[Melissa Lind]

Cassandra,

 

You're not being punished for something! Are you Catholic? :-) I am, and I
often have these feelings of guilt or punishment-sometimes we just can't see
through the bleakness and the sadness, and we try to rationalize in any way
possible. There is no way that God or the Universe or Karma or whatever you
may believe in is punishing you. I firmly believe that because we love so
much, we will inevitably hurt more than other people who don't love animals.
There's the old saying that "God only gives us what we can handle," and I
used to tell myself that when I lost my son. I'm not sure I believe it or
not, but I want to. It's not that we are being punished, but we are people
who can handle it. We have to for these kitties since no one will. We will
suffer in the process, but we know that the time we did spend with these
babies is still worth all our grief. We can handle it because we're strong
people who stand up for our fellow creatures who are innocent, neglected,
and abused.

 

I guess I think of it as a yin/yang type thing-or a balance if you will. Our
grief is directly proportional to our capacity to love-so clearly, you and
everyone on this list are very loving people. Although the sadness can be
overwhelming, it is the result of a greater love and compassion for
others-it comes from your heart. It's not punishment that all this is
happening at once, but I understand how you can feel that way. Another old
saying: When it rains, it pours. For me this seems to be the case! But,
you'll get through it! Keep your head up and realize how special you, your
husband, and those around you are since what you do is a phenomenal gift to
our world.

 

Best,

Melissa

  _  

From: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
[mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of C & J
Sent: Friday, June 15, 2007 10:34 PM
To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org
Subject: Re: Kisa is gone, thank you all

 

I just want to thank you all for your many kind words and thoughts regarding
Kisa, Koda, and Tomi.

 

This is one of the few places where I feel comfortable sharing how strongly
I feel about my babies and how deeply saddened I am by their illnesses.  My
husband is about the only other person who understands how much our kitties
mean to both him and I.  Most other people I know don't understand the deep
bond one can have with an "animal".

 

All your replies have meant much to me, and made me feel better.  It is
amazing that you have never met my babies or I, and yet can offer so many
words of reassurance.

 

I am missing Kisa terribly, as she was so much fun to have around.  She was
the social one, who interacted with my other cats, grooming and playing.
Now I have three kitties left who have nothing at all to do with each other.
I think they all miss her.

 

Sadly, I am not having much time to grieve for Kisa, because I believe Tomi
is getting sick again.  The last few days, he seems to be getting more
anemic again, and he vomited tonight.  After he vomited, he was panting for
a few seconds.  I'm also worried that he hasn't grown back the hair on his
neck that was shaved 3 months ago for his blood test.  It still looks like
it did a week after it was shaved.   

I'm thinking of bringing him into the vet again, even though they wanted to
put him to sleep 2 months ago.  I was wondering if his hemobartonella may be
coming back, and that should be simple enough for them to test for.

 

I am so scared to have to go through this again so soon, and afraid Tomi
won't be able to pull off a miracle a second time.  I almost feel like we
are being punished for something, the way this nightmare seems to be
unfolding.

 

Cassandra

- Original Message - 

From: C  <mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]> & J 

To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org 

Sent: Tuesday, June 12, 2007 4:50 PM

Subject: Kisa is gone :(

 

Kisa passed away this morning while I was at work, exactly one month after
Koda.  My heart is broken, especially since I wasn't there with her at the
end.

 

I had prayed and hoped so much that she would continue to improve after she
started eating again a week and a half ago.  I suppose it was just too much
for her to overcome.  The anemia never really did improve much. Though her
breathing was better, her skin was so pale.

 

The last few days, her appetite faltered again, and she was getting weaker.
I didn't think today would be the day she died, though i'm relieved she
didn't have to go on suffering much longer.  I don't think she was in pain,
and I sincerely hope she wasn't in pain at the end.  It was just so hard to
see her so weak when she was as active and happy as a kitten 3 weeks ago.

 

Kisa is going to be missed more than words can say.  She never quite saw her
3rd birthday, but the time she spent with us will never be forgotten.  She
was special in so many ways, I wouldn't even know where to start to list

Re: Kisa is gone, thank you all

[elizabeth trent]

It was much harder to loose a dear kitty than to go through a divorce.
People don't understand that either.   It's true though - nothing leaves
such a hole in your heart.

Love and prayers to you and to Tomi, Cassandra.
elizabeth


On 6/15/07, Kelly L <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:


At 08:33 PM 6/15/2007, you wrote:

Cassandra
 You have been through so very much and I am hoping with all my heart that
Tomi will show signs of improvement,
Yes we all understand the pain of loving animals with life threatening
illnesses and we understand your grief, i hate to admit this but I did not
have the grief when I lost my dad that Ido when I lost one of my sweet
babies. Only those here will understand.
all my thoughts and hopes and good energy going to you
Kelly



 I just want to thank you all for your many kind words and thoughts
regarding Kisa, Koda, and Tomi.

This is one of the few places where I feel comfortable sharing how
strongly I feel about my babies and how deeply saddened I am by their
illnesses.  My husband is about the only other person who understands how
much our kitties mean to both him and I.  Most other people I know don't
understand the deep bond one can have with an "animal".

All your replies have meant much to me, and made me feel better.  It is
amazing that you have never met my babies or I, and yet can offer so many
words of reassurance.

I am missing Kisa terribly, as she was so much fun to have around.  She
was the social one, who interacted with my other cats, grooming and
playing.  Now I have three kitties left who have nothing at all to do with
each other.  I think they all miss her.

Sadly, I am not having much time to grieve for Kisa, because I believe
Tomi is getting sick again.  The last few days, he seems to be getting more
anemic again, and he vomited tonight.  After he vomited, he was panting for
a few seconds.  I'm also worried that he hasn't grown back the hair on his
neck that was shaved 3 months ago for his blood test.  It still looks like
it did a week after it was shaved.
I'm thinking of bringing him into the vet again, even though they wanted
to put him to sleep 2 months ago.  I was wondering if his hemobartonella may
be coming back, and that should be simple enough for them to test for.

I am so scared to have to go through this again so soon, and afraid Tomi
won't be able to pull off a miracle a second time.  I almost feel like we
are being punished for something, the way this nightmare seems to be
unfolding.

Cassandra
 - Original Message -
From: C & J <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org
Sent: Tuesday, June 12, 2007 4:50 PM
Subject: Kisa is gone :(

Kisa passed away this morning while I was at work, exactly one month after
Koda.  My heart is broken, especially since I wasn't there with her at the
end.

I had prayed and hoped so much that she would continue to improve after
she started eating again a week and a half ago.  I suppose it was just too
much for her to overcome.  The anemia never really did improve much. Though
her breathing was better, her skin was so pale.

The last few days, her appetite faltered again, and she was getting
weaker.  I didn't think today would be the day she died, though i'm relieved
she didn't have to go on suffering much longer.  I don't think she was in
pain, and I sincerely hope she wasn't in pain at the end.  It was just so
hard to see her so weak when she was as active and happy as a kitten 3 weeks
ago.

Kisa is going to be missed more than words can say.  She never quite saw
her 3rd birthday, but the time she spent with us will never be forgotten.
She was special in so many ways, I wouldn't even know where to start to list
them all.  Fearless, loving, gentle, playful, curious, and sweet are just a
few of the words that describe her.  She's been sleeping on my pillow the
last few nights, and i'm going to miss her warmth so much.

If it ever stops raining, she will be buried next to Koda tonight.  I made
a rock garden full of flowers on top of Koda's grave.  Now Kisa will join
her there.

Cassandra

--
No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG Free Edition.
Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.8.14/845 - Release Date: 6/12/2007
6:39 AM



No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG Free Edition.
Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.8.16/849 - Release Date: 6/14/2007
12:44 PM

Re: Kisa is gone, thank you all

[Jane Lyons]

I often wonder what the link is between those of us
who forge deep emotional connections with their
pets, and those who do not, or cannot.

I have always felt like the lunatic fringe when the loss
of my 19 year old cat was more painful than loosing
either of my parents.

As we all know, the stress of caring for a sick pet
is off the charts, for the likes of us. The internet and
support groups like this are really a lifeline.

Jane






On Jun 16, 2007, at 8:38 AM, dede hicken wrote:


Kelly,  I have never heard anyone admit that before,
but i agree with you.  I had a really bad time when my
mom died, but that hasn't been the case with the rest
of my relatives.  When Smokey died last summer...I
could have died.  We were so close, and it hurt so
very much.

In 2005, when our big orange guy, Ginger died
suddenly, I will never forget my husband going in that
room and seeing him.  I heard him crying, and that was
so unlike him.  We both really have emotional bonds
with these guys.  They are so loving, forgiving and
faithful.  It is a pleasure to be taking care of them.

Dede

--- Kelly L <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:


At 08:33 PM 6/15/2007, you wrote:

Cassandra
  You have been through so very much and I am hoping
with all my
heart that Tomi will show signs of improvement,
Yes we all understand the pain of loving animals
with life
threatening illnesses and we understand your grief,
i hate to admit
this but I did not have the grief when I lost my dad
that Ido when I
lost one of my sweet babies. Only those here will
understand.
all my thoughts and hopes and good energy going to
you
Kelly




I just want to thank you all for your many kind

words and thoughts

regarding Kisa, Koda, and Tomi.

This is one of the few places where I feel

comfortable sharing how

strongly I feel about my babies and how deeply

saddened I am by

their illnesses.  My husband is about the only

other person who

understands how much our kitties mean to both him

and I.  Most other

people I know don't understand the deep bond one

can have with an "animal".


All your replies have meant much to me, and made me

feel better.  It

is amazing that you have never met my babies or I,

and yet can offer

so many words of reassurance.

I am missing Kisa terribly, as she was so much fun

to have

around.  She was the social one, who interacted

with my other cats,

grooming and playing.  Now I have three kitties

left who have

nothing at all to do with each other.  I think they

all miss her.


Sadly, I am not having much time to grieve for

Kisa, because I

believe Tomi is getting sick again.  The last few

days, he seems to

be getting more anemic again, and he vomited

tonight.  After he

vomited, he was panting for a few seconds.  I'm

also worried that he

hasn't grown back the hair on his neck that was

shaved 3 months ago

for his blood test.  It still looks like it did a

week after it was shaved.

I'm thinking of bringing him into the vet again,

even though they

wanted to put him to sleep 2 months ago.  I was

wondering if his

hemobartonella may be coming back, and that should

be simple enough

for them to test for.

I am so scared to have to go through this again so

soon, and afraid

Tomi won't be able to pull off a miracle a second

time.  I almost

feel like we are being punished for something, the

way this

nightmare seems to be unfolding.

Cassandra
- Original Message -
From: C & J
To:



felvtalk@felineleukemia.org

Sent: Tuesday, June 12, 2007 4:50 PM
Subject: Kisa is gone :(

Kisa passed away this morning while I was at work,

exactly one month

after Koda.  My heart is broken, especially since I

wasn't there

with her at the end.

I had prayed and hoped so much that she would

continue to improve

after she started eating again a week and a half

ago.  I suppose it

was just too much for her to overcome.  The anemia

never really did

improve much. Though her breathing was better, her

skin was so pale.


The last few days, her appetite faltered again, and

she was getting

weaker.  I didn't think today would be the day she

died, though i'm

relieved she didn't have to go on suffering much

longer.  I don't

think she was in pain, and I sincerely hope she

wasn't in pain at

the end.  It was just so hard to see her so weak

when she was as

active and happy as a kitten 3 weeks ago.

Kisa is going to be missed more than words can say.

 She never quite

saw her 3rd birthday, but the time she spent with

us will never be

forgotten.  She was special in so many ways, I

wouldn't even know

where to start to list them all.  Fearless, loving,

gentle, playful,

curious, and sweet are just a few of the words that

describe

her.  She's been sleeping on my pillow the last few

nights, and i'm

going to miss her warmth so much.

If it ever stops raining, she will be buried next

to Koda

tonight.  I made a rock garden full of flowers on

top of Koda's

grav

Re: Kisa is gone, thank you all

[dede hicken]

Kelly,  I have never heard anyone admit that before,
but i agree with you.  I had a really bad time when my
mom died, but that hasn't been the case with the rest
of my relatives.  When Smokey died last summer...I
could have died.  We were so close, and it hurt so
very much.

In 2005, when our big orange guy, Ginger died
suddenly, I will never forget my husband going in that
room and seeing him.  I heard him crying, and that was
so unlike him.  We both really have emotional bonds
with these guys.  They are so loving, forgiving and
faithful.  It is a pleasure to be taking care of them.

Dede

--- Kelly L <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:

> At 08:33 PM 6/15/2007, you wrote:
> 
> Cassandra
>   You have been through so very much and I am hoping
> with all my 
> heart that Tomi will show signs of improvement,
> Yes we all understand the pain of loving animals
> with life 
> threatening illnesses and we understand your grief,
> i hate to admit 
> this but I did not have the grief when I lost my dad
> that Ido when I 
> lost one of my sweet babies. Only those here will
> understand.
> all my thoughts and hopes and good energy going to
> you
> Kelly
> 
> 
> 
> >I just want to thank you all for your many kind
> words and thoughts 
> >regarding Kisa, Koda, and Tomi.
> >
> >This is one of the few places where I feel
> comfortable sharing how 
> >strongly I feel about my babies and how deeply
> saddened I am by 
> >their illnesses.  My husband is about the only
> other person who 
> >understands how much our kitties mean to both him
> and I.  Most other 
> >people I know don't understand the deep bond one
> can have with an "animal".
> >
> >All your replies have meant much to me, and made me
> feel better.  It 
> >is amazing that you have never met my babies or I,
> and yet can offer 
> >so many words of reassurance.
> >
> >I am missing Kisa terribly, as she was so much fun
> to have 
> >around.  She was the social one, who interacted
> with my other cats, 
> >grooming and playing.  Now I have three kitties
> left who have 
> >nothing at all to do with each other.  I think they
> all miss her.
> >
> >Sadly, I am not having much time to grieve for
> Kisa, because I 
> >believe Tomi is getting sick again.  The last few
> days, he seems to 
> >be getting more anemic again, and he vomited
> tonight.  After he 
> >vomited, he was panting for a few seconds.  I'm
> also worried that he 
> >hasn't grown back the hair on his neck that was
> shaved 3 months ago 
> >for his blood test.  It still looks like it did a
> week after it was shaved.
> >I'm thinking of bringing him into the vet again,
> even though they 
> >wanted to put him to sleep 2 months ago.  I was
> wondering if his 
> >hemobartonella may be coming back, and that should
> be simple enough 
> >for them to test for.
> >
> >I am so scared to have to go through this again so
> soon, and afraid 
> >Tomi won't be able to pull off a miracle a second
> time.  I almost 
> >feel like we are being punished for something, the
> way this 
> >nightmare seems to be unfolding.
> >
> >Cassandra
> >- Original Message -
> >From: C & J
> >To:
>
felvtalk@felineleukemia.org
> >Sent: Tuesday, June 12, 2007 4:50 PM
> >Subject: Kisa is gone :(
> >
> >Kisa passed away this morning while I was at work,
> exactly one month 
> >after Koda.  My heart is broken, especially since I
> wasn't there 
> >with her at the end.
> >
> >I had prayed and hoped so much that she would
> continue to improve 
> >after she started eating again a week and a half
> ago.  I suppose it 
> >was just too much for her to overcome.  The anemia
> never really did 
> >improve much. Though her breathing was better, her
> skin was so pale.
> >
> >The last few days, her appetite faltered again, and
> she was getting 
> >weaker.  I didn't think today would be the day she
> died, though i'm 
> >relieved she didn't have to go on suffering much
> longer.  I don't 
> >think she was in pain, and I sincerely hope she
> wasn't in pain at 
> >the end.  It was just so hard to see her so weak
> when she was as 
> >active and happy as a kitten 3 weeks ago.
> >
> >Kisa is going to be missed more than words can say.
>  She never quite 
> >saw her 3rd birthday, but the time she spent with
> us will never be 
> >forgotten.  She was special in so many ways, I
> wouldn't even know 
> >where to start to list them all.  Fearless, loving,
> gentle, playful, 
> >curious, and sweet are just a few of the words that
> describe 
> >her.  She's been sleeping on my pillow the last few
> nights, and i'm 
> >going to miss her warmth so much.
> >
> >If it ever stops raining, she will be buried next
> to Koda 
> >tonight.  I made a rock garden full of flowers on
> top of Koda's 
> >grave.  Now Kisa will join her there.
> >
> >Cassandra
> >
> >
> >--
> >No virus found in this incoming message.
> >Checked by AVG Free Edition.
> >Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.8.14/845 -
> Relea

Re: Kisa is gone, thank you all

[Kelly L]

At 08:33 PM 6/15/2007, you wrote:

Cassandra
 You have been through so very much and I am hoping with all my 
heart that Tomi will show signs of improvement,
Yes we all understand the pain of loving animals with life 
threatening illnesses and we understand your grief, i hate to admit 
this but I did not have the grief when I lost my dad that Ido when I 
lost one of my sweet babies. Only those here will understand.

all my thoughts and hopes and good energy going to you
Kelly



I just want to thank you all for your many kind words and thoughts 
regarding Kisa, Koda, and Tomi.


This is one of the few places where I feel comfortable sharing how 
strongly I feel about my babies and how deeply saddened I am by 
their illnesses.  My husband is about the only other person who 
understands how much our kitties mean to both him and I.  Most other 
people I know don't understand the deep bond one can have with an "animal".


All your replies have meant much to me, and made me feel better.  It 
is amazing that you have never met my babies or I, and yet can offer 
so many words of reassurance.


I am missing Kisa terribly, as she was so much fun to have 
around.  She was the social one, who interacted with my other cats, 
grooming and playing.  Now I have three kitties left who have 
nothing at all to do with each other.  I think they all miss her.


Sadly, I am not having much time to grieve for Kisa, because I 
believe Tomi is getting sick again.  The last few days, he seems to 
be getting more anemic again, and he vomited tonight.  After he 
vomited, he was panting for a few seconds.  I'm also worried that he 
hasn't grown back the hair on his neck that was shaved 3 months ago 
for his blood test.  It still looks like it did a week after it was shaved.
I'm thinking of bringing him into the vet again, even though they 
wanted to put him to sleep 2 months ago.  I was wondering if his 
hemobartonella may be coming back, and that should be simple enough 
for them to test for.


I am so scared to have to go through this again so soon, and afraid 
Tomi won't be able to pull off a miracle a second time.  I almost 
feel like we are being punished for something, the way this 
nightmare seems to be unfolding.


Cassandra
- Original Message -
From: C & J
To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org
Sent: Tuesday, June 12, 2007 4:50 PM
Subject: Kisa is gone :(

Kisa passed away this morning while I was at work, exactly one month 
after Koda.  My heart is broken, especially since I wasn't there 
with her at the end.


I had prayed and hoped so much that she would continue to improve 
after she started eating again a week and a half ago.  I suppose it 
was just too much for her to overcome.  The anemia never really did 
improve much. Though her breathing was better, her skin was so pale.


The last few days, her appetite faltered again, and she was getting 
weaker.  I didn't think today would be the day she died, though i'm 
relieved she didn't have to go on suffering much longer.  I don't 
think she was in pain, and I sincerely hope she wasn't in pain at 
the end.  It was just so hard to see her so weak when she was as 
active and happy as a kitten 3 weeks ago.


Kisa is going to be missed more than words can say.  She never quite 
saw her 3rd birthday, but the time she spent with us will never be 
forgotten.  She was special in so many ways, I wouldn't even know 
where to start to list them all.  Fearless, loving, gentle, playful, 
curious, and sweet are just a few of the words that describe 
her.  She's been sleeping on my pillow the last few nights, and i'm 
going to miss her warmth so much.


If it ever stops raining, she will be buried next to Koda 
tonight.  I made a rock garden full of flowers on top of Koda's 
grave.  Now Kisa will join her there.


Cassandra


--
No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG Free Edition.
Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.8.14/845 - Release Date: 
6/12/2007 6:39 AM




No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG Free Edition.
Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.8.16/849 - Release Date: 
6/14/2007 12:44 PM

Re: Kisa is gone, thank you all

[C & J]

I just want to thank you all for your many kind words and thoughts regarding 
Kisa, Koda, and Tomi.

This is one of the few places where I feel comfortable sharing how strongly I 
feel about my babies and how deeply saddened I am by their illnesses.  My 
husband is about the only other person who understands how much our kitties 
mean to both him and I.  Most other people I know don't understand the deep 
bond one can have with an "animal".

All your replies have meant much to me, and made me feel better.  It is amazing 
that you have never met my babies or I, and yet can offer so many words of 
reassurance.

I am missing Kisa terribly, as she was so much fun to have around.  She was the 
social one, who interacted with my other cats, grooming and playing.  Now I 
have three kitties left who have nothing at all to do with each other.  I think 
they all miss her.

Sadly, I am not having much time to grieve for Kisa, because I believe Tomi is 
getting sick again.  The last few days, he seems to be getting more anemic 
again, and he vomited tonight.  After he vomited, he was panting for a few 
seconds.  I'm also worried that he hasn't grown back the hair on his neck that 
was shaved 3 months ago for his blood test.  It still looks like it did a week 
after it was shaved.  
I'm thinking of bringing him into the vet again, even though they wanted to put 
him to sleep 2 months ago.  I was wondering if his hemobartonella may be coming 
back, and that should be simple enough for them to test for.

I am so scared to have to go through this again so soon, and afraid Tomi won't 
be able to pull off a miracle a second time.  I almost feel like we are being 
punished for something, the way this nightmare seems to be unfolding.

Cassandra
  - Original Message - 
  From: C & J 
  To: felvtalk@felineleukemia.org 
  Sent: Tuesday, June 12, 2007 4:50 PM
  Subject: Kisa is gone :(


  Kisa passed away this morning while I was at work, exactly one month after 
Koda.  My heart is broken, especially since I wasn't there with her at the end.

  I had prayed and hoped so much that she would continue to improve after she 
started eating again a week and a half ago.  I suppose it was just too much for 
her to overcome.  The anemia never really did improve much. Though her 
breathing was better, her skin was so pale.

  The last few days, her appetite faltered again, and she was getting weaker.  
I didn't think today would be the day she died, though i'm relieved she didn't 
have to go on suffering much longer.  I don't think she was in pain, and I 
sincerely hope she wasn't in pain at the end.  It was just so hard to see her 
so weak when she was as active and happy as a kitten 3 weeks ago.

  Kisa is going to be missed more than words can say.  She never quite saw her 
3rd birthday, but the time she spent with us will never be forgotten.  She was 
special in so many ways, I wouldn't even know where to start to list them all.  
Fearless, loving, gentle, playful, curious, and sweet are just a few of the 
words that describe her.  She's been sleeping on my pillow the last few nights, 
and i'm going to miss her warmth so much.

  If it ever stops raining, she will be buried next to Koda tonight.  I made a 
rock garden full of flowers on top of Koda's grave.  Now Kisa will join her 
there.

  Cassandra


--


  No virus found in this incoming message.
  Checked by AVG Free Edition. 
  Version: 7.5.472 / Virus Database: 269.8.14/845 - Release Date: 6/12/2007 
6:39 AM