---------- Forwarded message --------- From: 'N Sekar' via iyer123 <[email protected]> Date: Sat, Sep 16, 2023 at 10:33 AM Subject: [iyer123] Fw: Snippets - Sitendra Kumar -
Forwarding what I received from a friend and my response to it. N Sekar Thanks - captured beautifully the middle class predicaments. Though not directly related but on a similar situation, let me say that we go to a restaurant (alone) and find a friend/s and all of us sit together and eat what each one of us ordered. Problem comes when the waiter asks whether it should be one bill (or even if he doesn't ask and assumes one of us will pay as we all sat together and brings one bill) and we, knowing fully well we can't afford vie with each other to offer to pay. Inwardly we curse ourselves (and others) but externally we act a as though it is not an issue at all. False prestige of the middle class. False prestige is one of the main reasons for the problems of the middle class. Why can't we be honest and ask the waiter to bring separate bills even if others say one bill - on them. Each paying for his is called "going Dutch" and it is the best solution - if I invite others then it is my responsibility but when we meet accidentally, there is no need to pay someone else's bill but we offer and pretend how generous we are. I have experienced it many times during my hostel day even when my father was supporting me and also later in life. Of course, it was not me always but I understand how others, who had to foot the bill, might be feeling at that time. Now my lines are clearly drawn. If I invite, I pay; otherwise I suggest that each pays his and if there is no consensus, ask the waiter to bring mine and leave to others to decide what they want. What acts we put up in front of others? Hypocrisy. N Sekar N Sekar On Saturday, September 16, 2023 at 05:24:34 AM GMT+4, Chittanandam V R < [email protected]> wrote: *Received from Shri Sitendra Kumar* * Times when every penny counted* *Atul Joshi* *Many people in my generation were raised in the late sixties by our parents with a relative sense of paucity and deprivation. I was able to go to a decent school with many amenities provided for, but lavishness or easy availability of money was never the case. ‘Single income family’ was the plausible explanation where my father was the sole earning member. He had the added responsibility to contribute to look after his extended family, which included brothers and sisters. The sum total was an acute awareness to live within our limited means.* *The year was 1992; we had just passed out of a government medical college when one of the more affluent one among us found his matrimonial match in a charming damsel from the US. The marriage function was to be held in one of the finest luxury hotels of Delhi. All of us were excited at the pleasant turn of events for our dear friend. That for most of us it was going to be the first exposure to a five-star hotel was another attraction.* *While at the hotel, I tried in vain to turn on the lights of the room. I was rudely ‘educated’ to put the card key in the socket at the entrance and everything turned into a dazzling array of exuberance. It was illuminating but embarrassing. My friend from the adjacent room came rushing to inform me that there was a fridge too in each room. As I was pleasantly overawed, he revealed that it was stocked with beer bottles and other goodies. He took out all the bottles from the fridge and fled as he did not want to waste such a ‘treasure’ in a teetotaler’s room. All in all, we were in a heaven afforded by our friend's riches and enhanced by his prospective in-laws’ largesse.* *In the evening was the sangeet where a celebrity woman singer was singing ghazals of Begum Akhtar and Farida Khanum. Currency notes were being showered on her; I too was nudged by a friend to join the frenzy. He whispered in my ears that as the groom’s friends we must not lag behind and should shed our middle-class reservations. Though I was sober, I carefully opened my wallet and took out a Rs 50 note. I whirled it over the head of my groom friend and off it went into the solicitous hands of the charming singer.* *It took me a couple of months to come to terms with this financial loss as my monthly budget went haywire. I still remember that moment of awkward madness with an aching heart. It taught me a life lesson about the pitfalls of extravagance.* *- Atul Joshi* ******************** *Chittanandam* <http://www.avg.com/email-signature?utm_medium=email&utm_source=link&utm_campaign=sig-email&utm_content=webmail> Virus-free.www.avg.com <http://www.avg.com/email-signature?utm_medium=email&utm_source=link&utm_campaign=sig-email&utm_content=webmail> <#m_-9155547047434967324_DAB4FAD8-2DD7-40BB-A1B8-4E2AA1F9FDF2> -- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "iyer123" group. To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to [email protected]. To view this discussion on the web visit https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/iyer123/128143957.2023774.1694846001407%40mail.yahoo.com <https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/iyer123/128143957.2023774.1694846001407%40mail.yahoo.com?utm_medium=email&utm_source=footer> . -- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Thatha_Patty" group. 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