Nancy- I would add one caveat. I don't think you did anything wrong. You were 
nice. When that becomes wrong we are all up the proverbial creek. But my 
addition would be to note that you might discuss this with your security or 
campus safety officer(s). Perhaps they'd have a good word or idea. I would make 
it plain that I don't want the student prosecuted or anything but that I'm just 
asking for advice. That way, if you do need to ask for assistance (unlikely!) 
they will be up to speed. I suspect this is just a person who is a little 
needy. Your only recourse as a response to the student would, as you say, 
likely involve embarrassment and perhaps worse. If you try to be nice, by 
responding, I think it likely that it will not have the effect you desire. :) 
Good luck with this one. Tim
_______________________________
Timothy O. Shearon, PhD
Professor and Chair Department of Psychology
The College of Idaho
Caldwell, ID 83605
email: [EMAIL PROTECTED]

teaching: intro to neuropsychology; psychopharmacology; general; history and 
systems

"What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for 
others and the world remains and is immortal." - Albert Pike



-----Original Message-----
From: DeVolder Carol L [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Sent: Fri 2/29/2008 9:33 PM
To: Teaching in the Psychological Sciences (TIPS)
Subject: RE: [tips] Unwanted student attention
 
Nancy,
I agree with Beth. I don't think you did anything wrong--if you did then I'm 
guilty of similar behavior. It may take her a while to get the idea, and she 
may never really get it, but if you don't respond (not even a single word like 
"thanks"), she will eventually go away.
Carol


Carol L. DeVolder, Ph.D. 
Professor of Psychology
Chair, Department of Psychology 
St. Ambrose University 
518 West Locust Street 
Davenport, Iowa 52803 

Phone: 563-333-6482 
e-mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED] 
web: http://web.sau.edu/psychology/psychfaculty/cdevolder.htm 

The contents of this message are confidential and may not be shared with anyone 
without permission of the sender.



-----Original Message-----
From: beth benoit [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Sent: Fri 2/29/2008 9:09 PM
To: Teaching in the Psychological Sciences (TIPS)
Subject: RE: [tips] Unwanted student attention
 
Nancy,
I'd suggest:  Don't respond AT ALL about ANYTHING, EVER again.  Sometimes
these extra-needy students are just looking for ANY kind of response.  
Beth Benoit
 
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Friday, February 29, 2008 9:46 PM
To: Teaching in the Psychological Sciences (TIPS)
Subject: Re: [tips] Unwanted student attention
 

Hi  -

I think I need help. I don't want to do anything to make this worse. Maybe
I'll join the bad day club if I manage to do that.

I had a very enthusiastic and dedicated female student, close to my age, in
my Fall 2007 Intro Psych class at Long Beach City. At the end of the term
she thanked me (profuselly) and gave me book as a gift (from my Amazon.com
wish list). As the book is not an atypical sort of gift from a student, I
accepted it graciously. Told her it was a pleasure to work with her and
"stay in touch" (something I say to many students).

Since then (late December) she has managed to email me at least 4 or 5 times
a week about something (usually a book or show she thinks I should see). I
respond politely - and tersely -to most of her emails. But it has escalated
into her sending me an invitation to bet on the Oscars with her for a cup of
coffee, and most recently an invitation to a concert on a Saturday night and
also an invitation to be on her Amazon.com Friends list

I am now REALLY uncomfortable. I don't want to do ANYTHING else to respond
as I don't feel that I encouraged this and it is bordering on creepy -
please, please, give me a reality check if I am wrong about this. I don't
want to hang out with her or even feel bullied into being involved in a
personal "friends" list at a commerical site.

If anyone has ANY suggestions how I can discourage this in a polite and
professional way, I would welcome them. I know that perhaps nothing I do
that indicates reticience will stop her from being angry/hurt. Again, I
don't think did anything to indicate that I'd be her friend

Thanks and if I did anything stupid here...I'll take that kind of feedback
off list.

Nancy Melucci
Long Beach City College
Long Beach CA

-----Original Message-----
From: Shearon, Tim <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: Teaching in the Psychological Sciences (TIPS) <[email protected]>
Sent: Fri, 29 Feb 2008 11:52 am
Subject: RE: [tips] this world is getting crazy - update
 
Bill- That's despicable!! I don't suppose they saved the envelope? If there 
wasn't one, that's worse! I think this kind of anonymous and cowardly act on
a 
college campus is worse than cheating. In such instances the dean/VP should 
immediately attempt to identify the cretin(s) and ask for explanation
(purely 
hypothetically, with a large pointy stick; I'd never suggest such a thing in

reality). At any rate, I am very happy that you are back!!
Tim
(the parenthetical remarks above were not made for reasons other than
sarcasm 
toward anyone lurking who might read them and not realize that you, agency
or 
otherwise, are also, purely hypothetically, engaging in a form of 
harassment/terrorism- am I safe now?)
_______________________________
Timothy O. Shearon, PhD
Professor and Chair Department of Psychology
The College of Idaho
Caldwell, ID 83605
email: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
 
teaching: intro to neuropsychology; psychopharmacology; general; history and

systems
 
"What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for 
others and the world remains and is immortal." - Albert Pike
 
 
 
-----Original Message-----
From: William Scott [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] <mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
]
Sent: Fri 2/29/2008 12:19 PM
To: Teaching in the Psychological Sciences (TIPS)
Subject: RE: [tips] this world is getting crazy - update
 
It was an anonymous letter from someone who signed it "a friend of higher 
education" and it sent a copy of my posting and accused me of "making
terrorist 
threats". I saw the letter.
 
 
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