Ok, an update on the situation: looks like I'm an idiot -.-
I was doing the hp-setup without being su, so of course it wouldn't change the system settings :P
Everything seems to be working now.

The problem that remains is the test page, that seems to be a problem with a lot of HP printers (a quick search revealed dozens of people with the same problem). I shouldn't nitpick since it was given to me second hand, but still, it's a stupid thing HP make their stuff like this. I will have to try to solve this, or else I won't be keeping the printer. Lots of wasted ink and paper on test pages -.-

So, if anyone here can't seem to install a printer, don't forget to make su before :P

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