Facebook is designed to addict its "users" with what its former vice-president describes as "dopemine-driven feedback loops."
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2017/dec/11/facebook-former-executive-ripping-society-apart Your family's rationalizations for subjecting themselves to Facebook's abuse are typical of any kind of addict. It is important to understand how difficult it is for an addict to acknowledge that they are no longer in control of their own lives. It sounds like you have tried to reason with them and it has not worked. This is unsuprising but you should not give up. While you cannot control the way they think, you can provide context that may help them eventually reach the same conclusion independently. It will also help to identify the need that Facebook fulfills for them and suggest healthier alternatives. A friend recently told me that he began transitioning to vegetarianism not by removing meat from his diet, but by introducing tofu into his diet. It is easier to eliminate something from your life when you have the security of a familiar replacement. Depending on your family's situation, there are several replacements you may try to introduce them to before you attempt to convince them to abandon Facebook completely. (1) Offline interaction. If you live near your family, you may propose spending more time with them in person. You do not have to present this as a replacement for Facebook, because it is worthwhile in itself. If you do not live near your family, frequent phone calls may be enough. You say that your mother is angry at you for avoiding Facebook. Perhaps this is because Facebook has convinced her that it is her only way to have a relationship with you. If so, it is understandable that you avoiding Facebook would scare her. If you can show her that Facebook is unecessary to maintain relationships she might feel less dependent on it. (2) Online alternatives to dedicated "social media." Email and XMPP can serve many of the same functions as Facebook with less risk of those needs being associated with a proprietary interface. Email photos to your family. Encourage them to chat with you via XMPP. Maybe act a little annoyed at *them* if they refuse to connect with you this way. Facebook did not invent chatting, blogging, or sharing photographs. Their innovation was aggregating these technologies into an addictive interface. You can show your family that they do not need rely on Facebook for these features. (3) A libre, decentralized replacement for Facebook. I am aware of three: Diaspora, Friendica, and GNU Social. Of these, Diaspora will probably be the most appealing to your family. Many Diaspora pods support cross-posting to Facebook or Twitter, meaning that your family may post photos to Diaspora for you to see that are also posted to Facebook for their other friends to see. Ideally they would not provide any information to Facebook, but this will at least allow them to do so without engaging with Facebook's addictive interface and introduce them to a more freedom-respecting replacement. I have some concerns about Diaspora. Although it is free software and I suspect no malice from the developers, I worry that it unintentionally inherits some addictive antifeatures from Facebook in an attempt to replace it. That said, it is far better than Facebook, as any accidental antifeatures may be removed by exercising freedoms 1 and 3, while Facebook will continue to refine its intentional antifeatures and will not allow you the freedom to remove them. Let me know if I can clarify anything I've written. It is difficult to have a discussion like this in a language that is not your native one. It is admirable that you are participating in a forum that is not in your native language in order to help your family.
