[TruthTalk] A little kindness please...

[ShieldsFamily]

Jonathan,    I certainly understand how it feels to be constantly dealing with a painful issue and then not only get support, but “constructive” criticism for it.  (This is NOT to criticize JT specifically!)  When one is dealing with a crushing problem that has gone on for so long that it seems endless, and you are just trying to survive, well-meant but ill-timed criticism can be like an unexpected slap in the face.  When one’s emotional and physical reserves are already depleted, such lack of empathy can be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.  It is as if someone has walked up behind you and given just that little kick that causes your knees to buckle under you.   In just the same way, when one has been carrying a crushing load, and on top of that has grown used to “helpful” critical statements, a rare word of true understanding can bring such healing and relief.  John’s kind post to me the day before yesterday was exactly that.  At just a time when the Lord has been doing the end of a long-stage healing in me of deep wounds, DM’s words of criticism cut me to the quick.  Even if the advice is right, the timing can be all wrong.  But unexpected kindness can be just a healing.  When I read John’s words it just seemed to just cause the dam to burst.  I couldn’t remember the last time someone really seemed to understand.  It was like the Holy Spirit Himself had come along side me, put His arm around me, and held me close.  Only John had the insight to know that was just what I needed.   I sat in the bathtub yesterday morning and unexpectedly burst into great sobs of release. I knew that was the last loving cleaning release that I needed, and just sat there and gave in to it.  It was as if the Holy Spirit was giving me Heavenly Open-Heart Massage.  I only share this so openly right now, as it is so personal, in the hope that we might all walk in sensitivity where there is someone’s personal wound lying there like a raw, twitching nerve.  Resist the opportunity to state the obvious clichés and stomp on it.  The person in pain is already aware of all the “obvious” answers.  What they need is a tender, healing, loving touch from Jesus.  That must come through us, even with such a small thing as a kind word of understanding.  I can’t express to you, Jonathan, how much I wish I could offer such a thing for you.    Izzy Ecclesiastes 3 1   There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a) time for every event under heaven--  3   A time to kill and a time to heal; A time to tear down and a time to build up.     From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Jonathan Hughes Sent: Thursday, June 10, 2004 6:38 PM To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] Subject: RE: [TruthTalk] the real vs false   From the sound of things you may not care much for what I have to say in response.  You have not offended me, but you have deeply hurt me.  That I am crying right now, a grown man weeping over his keyboard may not move you, may not touch you.  You may feel you have spoken the Word of the Lord to me, that you have spoken the truth in love.  You have never been more wrong.  I want to type more but I can’t.   With tears,   Jonathan