so now I'm dying to know, what do you do for work?  Are you a farmer
or something?

--- In [email protected], "algriner1" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
wrote:
>
> 
> Okay, can someone explain to me the whole fascination with THE RING?? 
> Maybe what I don't get is the whole surprising someone with something
> they may not like (Diane, your tale of bridezilla woe is a fantastic
> example of this!).
> 
> Maybe I don't get it because in my job I spend my day wrist-to-shoulder
> deep in soil, plant matter, seeds, fish emulsion, and sometimes,
> literally, poop...well, semi-composted manure, but the point is really I
> CAN'T wear rings at work.  But why spend huge amounts of money on
> something that may not be right?
> 
> Granted, after my engagement, we did spend about 3 months drawing and
> designing, and finally, inking matching "engagement tattoos."  Which
> maybe sorta explains getting engaged in the burrito barn...but they're
> perfect, they express *us,* and that's what matters...that we BOTH
> chose, and approved.
> 
> So, can someone, either gender, I don't care, explain why picking out a
> ring for someone else is something that's taken sooooooo seriously?
> 
> Amy "Organic Gal"
> 
> 
> --- In [email protected], "denisesudell"
> <dsudell7781@> wrote:
> >
> > --- In [email protected], Diane Lochner
> > dlochund@ wrote:
> > >
> > > I have zero issues with the proposal...his bride-to-be is the one
> > who didn't like the proposal. i don't know what kind of fantasy she
> > had in her head
> >
> > That was going to be my question: what kind of proposal did she
> > want?
> >
> > I do have an unappreciated-engagement story from my own life, in
> > which I was the Bridezilla-equivalent. (Yes, the story involves me
> > and another woman.) But as it turned out, my hesitations were well-
> > founded.
> >
> > To make a very long story as short as I can manage: I was involved
> > with a woman to whom I proposed on the spur of the moment at
> > Thanksgiving 1990. Not sure why, but for some reason she, not I,
> > ended up in the position of buying a ring -- probably because I told
> > her at some point that rings were important to me.
> >
> > Possibly like your Bridezilla, Diane, I had a whole fantasy about my
> > then-GF and I going out together to pick out rings that meant
> > something to both of us. Unfortunately, I did not share this
> > fantasy quickly enough with my then-GF, who went out by herself and
> > bought a ring with which to surprise me at Christmas. A couple of
> > weeks before the holiday, I began to suspect this was coming, and
> > didn't know how to tell her that I had envisioned a joint ring-
> > buying process, so I just kept my mouth shut and my fingers
> > crossed. (Let me add that she was susceptible to flying into a rage
> > at the slightest provocation.)
> >
> > Well, Christmas came, and she gave me the little white box, and in
> > it was the ugliest ring I'd ever seen. (It was sterling silver,
> > which I do love, but it had little . . . things sticking out of the
> > top. Non-sparkly, non-shiny things that looked like little
> > silver . . . bricks. It looked more like an instrument of torture
> > than anything else.) I tried to swallow my horror, and asked in
> > false cheeriness, "Gosh, honey, why did you choose *this* ring?"
> > But I am a lousy liar, and she behaved just as I was afraid she
> > would: flew into a rage at my failure to properly appreciate her
> > gift.
> >
> > To keep this story from becoming even more interminable than it
> > already is, I'll just say that in the end, I had two different
> > people (unknown to each other) "intervene" with me to tell me that I
> > was in an emotionally abusive relationship and I should get out of
> > it, which I eventually did. Embarrassingly, one of the things that
> > made me realize that I needed to leave my GF behind was passing a
> > jewelry store window alone one night and unexpectedly bursting into
> > torrential tears over everything I would be giving up by staying in
> > the relationship -- symbolized, of course, by that awful ring.
> >
> > I suspect it probably makes a difference if you're heterosexual and
> > the proposal starts a whole massive set of Wedding Machinery
> > grinding. That sure didn't happen with my ex and me. Thank Gawd.
> >
> > BTW, with my current honey, I'd be happy to go to the courthouse in
> > shorts and a beat-up t-shirt -- if only they wouldn't turn us away
> > at the courthouse door. But that's a whole 'nother rant.
> >
>






 
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