Hi Firstly, being sighted should not be the primary factor in deciding the partner. With what I gather, she is genuinely wanting to be your partner despite your disability. This is very important. Make sure you get this right. Find out from her how far she is going to go despite the opposition from mother. To take her onboard, that can be done for which you need to understand her fear and apprehension and find what will make her convince. Usually talking to a couple who are in a similar situation is one way of doing it.
Sometimes, there may be some unrelated issue which may be playing in her mind like family tradition, status etc. This has to be addressed accordingly. What comes in my mind is the novel 2 states and being able bodied and very well educated, what did they have to go through to get married is just an indication how complex some stupid notions can drive situation. Harish. -----Original Message----- From: AccessIndia [mailto:[email protected]] On Behalf Of Alvesh Shokeen Sent: Monday, March 19, 2018 3:09 PM To: accessindia <[email protected]> Subject: [AI] Serious advice needed on the issue of marriage with a sighted girl Hi friends and seniors, I am 30 years old, well educated and central government employee. I have some serious issue with my eyesight, as the doctors say that I have Retinitis Pigmentosa, which is stable and I have fair eyesight to manage my all day to day chores except reading writing and driving. People generally don't recognize me easily that I am having problem of eyesight. Before few months I was introduced to a girls family with a view of marriage, the girl was also there. The girls family liked me looking my job and higher education, as I am well settled in my life. Thereafter I started chatting with that girl, she also started liking me and we started talking on phone for longer hours. I clearly told that girl that I have serious issue with my eyesight, and I can see little, and I prefer to take someone with me if I go out to unknown places or while traveling. She looked perfectly fine with that, she told me that she will be with me in any case. Then second time her family came to meet me formally and I told her father about my eyesight issue, he also looked quite normal with that, and he said that physical problem may hit anyone so we are ok with it. Thereafter we met in a function again. Everything was going normal. But nothing sort of engagement etc was done as my family was not ready to fix the marriage so erly. In between few of my relatives told the mother of the girl that this boy has very serious issue with his eyesight, as he can not go outside alone, and he can not walk in sunlight and he can not do his work independently. After listening this all (which is not true) her mother created lots of drama, and convinced the father of girl that they will not marry their daughter to me. Now present situation is that the girl is in full favour of me, she is trying her best to convince her parants that she has no issue with eyesight problem of the boy. But her mother is torturing her and blackmailing her emotionally saying that you will always be in pain if you will not be obedient to your mother. So dear friends, kindly suggest me what should I do here, should I talk to her parants and try to remove their doubts about the situation which they have visualized in their minds on the account of my poor eyesight? Because they are saying only thing that how will he manage if he has poor eyesight. Should I try to save my relationship with that girl who is supporting me despite of my visual impairment? Will I be losing an understanding and supporting life partner if I let this relationship go? Or will it emotionally hurt me back as the family of the girl will target me after the marriage due to my eyes problem.. Please suggest me what should I do, as I am in difficult situation. Search for old postings at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ To unsubscribe send a message to [email protected] with the subject unsubscribe. To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please visit the list home page at http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in Disclaimer: 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails sent through this mailing list.. ________________________________ Caution: The Reserve Bank of India never sends mails, SMSs or makes calls asking for personal information such as your bank account details, passwords, etc. It never keeps or offers funds to anyone. Please do not respond in any manner to such offers, however official or attractive they may look. Notice: This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential and intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they are addressed. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, use, review, distribution, printing or copying of the information contained in this e-mail message and/or attachments to it are strictly prohibited. If you have received this email by error, please notify us by return e-mail or telephone and immediately and permanently delete the message and any attachments. The recipient should check this email and any attachments for the presence of viruses. The Reserve Bank of India accepts no liability for any damage caused by any virus transmitted by this email. Search for old postings at: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/ To unsubscribe send a message to [email protected] with the subject unsubscribe. To change your subscription to digest mode or make any other changes, please visit the list home page at http://accessindia.org.in/mailman/listinfo/accessindia_accessindia.org.in Disclaimer: 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity; 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails sent through this mailing list..
