Marvin, Apostate and Heretic, wrote:
> On Wed, 13 Jun 2001, Adam C. Lipscomb wrote:
> >
> > Hmph. "Barbecued Beef" is an oxymoron. As an apostle of The One True
> > Church of BBQ, I can tell you that The Lord will take pity upon you for
your
> > faulty digestive system, but you will remain like Moses, forced to end
your
> > days outside the restaurant, watching in envy as your fellows savor the
> > Promised Goodness of pit-cooked, chopped on a bun.
> >
> Always a sad thing, to lose another promising soul to the BBQ Swine Cult
> whose origins lie in the less enlightened southeastern portions of this
> here United States. Especially painful to see one of its members stoop to
> degredation of the chopping, rather than slicing, his food as though it
> needed somehow to be punished.
>
> I'm not saying BBQ pig flesh doesn't have a place. And sometimes chopping
> the meat is appropriate...if you need to feed a child whose teeth are
> wobbly, say.
>
> But there is a natural order to things, and beef BBQ is to pig as
> _Macbeth_ is to _Cats_, you poor, poor soul.
I have been a disciple of the One True Meat for longer than you have been
alive, unbeliever. The pig, sacred and holy among all of God's creatures,
has been ordained since Creation to be the Slow Cooked meat of choice. To
deny one's self the SAVORY GOODNESS of PORK is to deny one's self admission
into the GATES OF HEAVEN.
I weep for your pitiful soul, Marvin.
Deacon Adam C. Lipscomb
[EMAIL PROTECTED]
