Calling the cops does seem a little extreme, but think of it this way: if they had to call the cops once b/c of her misbehavior, then this is even more hard evidence that the mother is not fit to be one, and will help child welfare with their case....
At 05:24 PM 3/21/2005, you wrote: >The cops, Bill? The cops? What are they going to do, lock her up with >the local child molesters? If the child is that big a handful there is >something wrong and she needs treatment. If the mother won't get it >it's time to call child welfare. But the cops? Let's get a grip. > >Dana > > >On Mon, 21 Mar 2005 16:23:44 -0500, Bill Wheatley <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > I don't know if they didn't already try that. If the mothers not going > > to do her job and discipline her child and teach her that behaviour is > > not acceptable then i could see why they would call the cops. > > > > > > On Mon, 21 Mar 2005 11:46:48 -0600, Dana <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > I have to admit that the quote is highly suggestive :) nonetheless I'd > > > withdraw my child too under the circumstances. > > > > > > Even if the child is a problem and/or troubled, there are more > > > approriate solutions than the police. She is five for chrissakes. How > > > about a referral to counseling, family counseling if appropriate, > > > suspension, or a call to CYFD if the mother in fact seems to be the > > > problem? > > > > > > Dana > > > > > > > > > On Mon, 21 Mar 2005 12:05:40 -0500, Bill Wheatley > <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > Dana read this > > > > > > > > http://www.local10.com/education/4298451/detail.html > > > > > > > > No charges were filed and the girl went home with her mother, who said > > > > her daughter will not return. In her words, "They set my baby up." > > > > > > > > Does that quote from the mother let you figure out why this kid > > > > couldn't control herself? A disruptive child should not be in school. > > > > I don't care how old the kid is. If the kid is old enough to know not > > > > to act like a jackass then its old enough to be taught a lesson. I > > > > bet a ride in a police cruiser will help especially since this lady > > > > sounds like a world class mother. She sounds like an unfit mother and > > > > a mother who can not control her child. At 5 sure i got rambunchus but > > > > never in school. I think we're in a time where parents don't know how > > > > to control their kids and need to start watching supernanny (which is > > > > on tonight 10pm on ABC btw..go go nanny jo). > > > > > > > > I will tell you something though if i had done that as a child my > > > > mother would have made me regret it and it would never have happened > > > > again. And my child will NEVER do that more then onces because they > > > > will learn they are in trouble. > > > > > > > > As a parent i have always gone about it the same way as my parents. If > > > > an adult came to my parents and said i did something wrong it was > > > > believe the adult first. That is the way it is for me as well. I will > > > > always (in most cases) take the word of an adult over my children. > > > > That is how the world used to be. Parents were responsible and they > > > > did not allow that to happen. Today parents want to be friends with > > > > their kids. I don't care if my kids hate my guts and for awhile they > > > > did but they realize i did what i did because i loved them and cared > > > > about them. > > > > > > > > Myself as a child i never lied much to my parents and never about > > > > something big because they would always find out. And my punishment > > > > would be alot worse that way for lieing. One day i walked into a > > > > friends house using his key when he wasnt home. I just wanted to play > > > > his nintendo but his dad came home and i left. He told me you better > > > > tell your mother before i do lol. I DID i came right home and mom knew > > > > right away something was wrong. I told her it was hard and i was > > > > scared but i told her. She was pissed but she would have been alot > > > > more pissed if it came from my friends father instead of me. > > > > > > > > So back to the little 5 year old heavyweight. The kid has a history of > > > > being a violent kid and after you tell the kids parents time and time > > > > again about what the kid did and the parent just makes excuses and > > > > doesn't fix the problem then its time to get the police involved. > > > > Maybe the police will have better luck. Maybe the kid will think ok if > > > > i act like a shit my mom won't stop me but i'll have to get pulled > > > > away by the police again. > > > > > > > > Remember dana (and i dont mean this to be insulting) everyone can't be > > > > as good a mother as you. Some moms suck. Maybe you have too much faith > > > > in the fact that being a parent makes people able to handle their kids > > > > or at least take responsiblity for them. I think many parents suck and > > > > things like this happen. I mean sure i might have thought it was a > > > > little heavy handed but to hear the lady say "THEY SET MY BABY UP" > > > > thats just horseshit. That is probably the stupidest thing i had heard > > > > all day that day when i read this. > > > > > > > > On Sat, 19 Mar 2005 14:31:27 -0600, Dana <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > wrote: > > > > > I've used the wrap hold myself. Lara used to regularly throw fits but > > > > > always over some preceived unfairness such as bedtime. > > > > > > > > > > I don't really have enough information either. However, if the police > > > > > had previously been called for this child I don't find it > particularly > > > > > astounding that she might become hysterical on being threatened with > > > > > them. > > > > > > > > > > I agree that you might well have to restrain the child and that the > > > > > mother might not want to recognize a definite behavior problem. That > > > > > kind of thinking definitely exists and I have seen plenty of it. > > > > > > > > > > But here is the crux of the matter for me. We have on the one side a > > > > > five-year-old child. We have on the other an entire school of adults > > > > > supposedly trained in dealing with children. And the best thing the > > > > > adults came up with, between them all, was to bring in men with guns > > > > > and handcuffs. > > > > > > > > > > Bra fucking vo. > > > > > > > > > > Dana > > > > > > > > > > On Sat, 19 Mar 2005 01:30:20 -0500, Jim Davis > > > > > <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > > > > -----Original Message----- > > > > > > > From: Dana [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > > > > > Sent: Friday, March 18, 2005 10:34 PM > > > > > > > To: CF-Community > > > > > > > Subject: Re: You know it's been a tough day at kindergarten > when ... > > > > > > > > > > > > > > oh come on though this child is 5. And she refused to play a > game with > > > > > > > jelly beans. You best believe I'd be upset too if my child > were put in > > > > > > > handcuffs over something like that. Throwing stuff in a trash > can ok, > > > > > > > we are talking behavior problems sure! What happened to > timeout and > > > > > > > the principal's office! The lunatics are running the asylum. > > > > > > > > > > > > I didn't read why she was in trouble in the first place. > > > > > > > > > > > > But I do think you're being a bit disingenuous - she not only > "threw stuff > > > > > > trash can". She hit, repeatedly, several people, threw things > and had > > > > > > (reportedly) nearly an hour to calm down. This was also not > the first time > > > > > > that the police were required to calm the child. > > > > > > > > > > > > The child WAS in a timeout in the assistant principles office - > then she > > > > > > began hitting and kicking the assistant principle after > throwing things from > > > > > > her desk. > > > > > > > > > > > > Although she was five I also remember that she was over 4' tall > - that's a > > > > > > sizable five-year old. She could very well do some damage (ask > a five year > > > > > > old to punch or kick your hand as hard as they can sometime - > kids can be > > > > > > amazingly strong). > > > > > > > > > > > > Impulse control and violent rage are only slightly less > dangerous in > > > > > > children than they are in adults. If the police officers felt > they could be > > > > > > injured (a very real possibility even with so young a child) or > that the > > > > > > child could injure herself then I feel they were well within > their rights to > > > > > > restrain her. > > > > > > > > > > > > Also let's be clear: restraining a child is not an easy thing - > even one > > > > > > that young. Professionals generally use a wrap-technique: from > behind hold > > > > > > the child's opposite wrists and wrap their arms across their > body. Then sit > > > > > > down (so they can't kick you) and lean back (so it's more > difficult to > > > > > > head-butt you). > > > > > > > > > > > > This pretty much impossible to do safely in a car (it was in > the car that > > > > > > the child's legs were restrained after she refused to stop > kicking). Even > > > > > > in this position the child can still squirm and either break > free (which > > > > > > usually leads to a punch) or potentially injure themselves or you. > > > > > > > > > > > > (Also, as an aside: it's always taught to restrain the child > until they're > > > > > > calm for more than 60 seconds. Many parents go into a fit when > a caregiver > > > > > > refuses to release their child upon demand - but a good > caregiver will wait > > > > > > and ensure that the child is calm enough to release.) > > > > > > > > > > > > Without more facts I won't say anybody is at fault, but I can > definitely see > > > > > > how the situation could have escalated to the point it did with > nobody BEING > > > > > > at fault. I've been in similar situations. > > > > > > > > > > > > In both cases that I was injured by children (one girl punch me > in the face > > > > > > and one 10 year-old slashed my arm with a bread knife) the kids > were still > > > > > > enrolled in public school - on the cusp to be sure, but still > in school. > > > > > > Many schools are actually much better than people give them > credit for and > > > > > > will put up with disruptive kids longer than most private > schools would. > > > > > > > > > > > > No parent likes to think that their child can be dangerous and > I've yet to > > > > > > see a parent pleased when they hear that their child has been > restrained. > > > > > > However sometimes its required to keep the child from hurting > themselves or > > > > > > others. > > > > > > > > > > > > Jim Davis > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| Find out how CFTicket can increase your company's customer support efficiency by 100% http://www.houseoffusion.com/banners/view.cfm?bannerid=49 Message: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=i:5:151158 Archives: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/threads.cfm/5 Subscription: http://www.houseoffusion.com/lists.cfm/link=s:5 Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/cf_lists/unsubscribe.cfm?user=89.70.5 Donations & Support: http://www.houseoffusion.com/tiny.cfm/54
