>  So the question is, how do I handle this?  I've looked at the yard signs,
>  and some are cute and friendly, but I abhor the idea of having to put at
>  least two signs in front of my house that a) makes me look like an ogre, and
>  b) makes my yard look like a dog park.

http://www.yuckos.com/polyjunior.htm

It's $65, has bags and a sign - add your own wording.... and rig up a
siren for when someone takes a bag.

Heh

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