Too late Beth, I got my ordination about 10 years ago from a different mail 
order religion. I was really tempted to go for pope, but it cost $50.

larry

At 08:16 AM 4/8/02 -0800, you wrote:
>OMG, I just received the following in my mailbox.  Too Funny.
>
>Howard, should I become the first athiest ordained minister?
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
>To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
>Sent: Monday, April 08, 2002 5:34 AM
>Subject: Considering Ordination? We can assist you.
>
>
> > STREET BISHOPS, a U.S. based international ministry, wants to ordain you.
>This is a genuine outreach to enable those who want to serve an opportunity
>to do so. More than 170 men and women around the world have joined Street
>Bishops in changing lives, you can too.
> >
> > STREET BISHOPS believes that ordination should be given to all who ask.
>One of the benefits of being a LEGAL member of the clergy is that you will
>be authorized to perform the rites and ceremonies of the church. They
>include:
> >
> > WEDDINGS - You can earn part-time income officiating marriages on
>weekends. Couples are searching for a wedding officiates. Most states
>require that you register your certificate (THAT WE SEND YOU) prior to
>conducting the ceremony. Some pastors work full-time as a wedding officiate,
>so can you! And we'll put you in our database of officiates which receives
>thousands of requests for ordained ministers!
> >
> > FUNERALS - The simple fact is that people die every day, providing a
>never-ending need for funeral officiates.
> >
> > BAPTISMS - What a special way to welcome a child of God. As millions
>return to church and desire these official ceremonies, you are there to
>assist them! This adds to your part or full time income as a minister!
> >
> > PRISON MINISTRIES - Since you will be a Certified Minister, you can visit
>others in need. Assist those who are ready to CHANGE their lives - You can
>play a major part in that decision!
> >
> > HOSPITAL MINISTRIES - As an ordained clergy, you can be listed with most
>hospitals and conduct a successful hospital ministry.
> >
> > WANT TO START YOUR OWN CHURCH? After your ordination, you may start your
>own congregation! We can offer much assistance as you begin your new place
>of worship.
> >
> > APOSTOLIC SUCCESSION? Yes! Once accepted through our ministry, we will, at
>no additional admin fee, pass your file onto an independent Catholic order
>for consideration.
> >
> > WHAT ARE PEOPLE SAYING? "You are truly an answer to prayer for myself and
>for hundreds, if not thousands, of men who have been frustrated with
>constitution, laws, and by-laws of most denominations who have denied
>brethren who have answered the call of God." - Colorado Springs, Colorado.
>"We've been wanting to take communion during the weeks we are without a
>Priest, and now we are able to do that." - Greenwith, Australia
> >
> > WHAT IS REQUIRED? That you intend to become ordained to honestly bring
>love, understanding, peace, comfort, compassion, and forgiveness to the
>world. No degrees needed, no hoops to jump through, no restrictions on
>gender or any other ridiculous hurdle. Promise to honor God and that is all
>that's required.
> >
> > YOU RECEIVE a professionally printed 8-inch by 10-inch color certificate
>and Letter of Ordination/Proof of Minister Certification in your name. We
>pay the U.S. shipping. For Shipping OUTSIDE the U.S. please add $15.00.
> >
> > NEWSLETTER. You will also begin receiving our helpful newsletter with
>advice and answers as you begin your new ministry. This is what makes us
>very different from the others; we provide support along with the
>credentials.
> >
> > THE STREET BISHOP goal is to make this life changing step easy and
>affordable so average folks like you can benefit from the advantages of
>being ordained, and you can be enabled to serve others. The administrative
>costs for processing the ordination is only $29.00.
> >
> > FAX: To place your order by fax, complete the following form and fax to
>1-413-487-7457, or use postal mail.
> >
> > MAIL: For Cash, Check, or Money Order, complete the form below, make your
>check payable to "TSG" and mail to
> >
> > Ordination Committee Chair
> > 3206 South Hopkins Ave, #89
> > Titusville, Florida 32780 U.S.A.
> >
> > The committee meets every other day, all applications processed within 3
>days of receiving them.
> >
> > Check all that apply:
> >
> > __________ $29.00 admin fee for your Ordination Certificate/Credentials
> > __________ $15.00 for International Shipping (if outside the US, $6 if in
>Canada)
> > __________ Optional: $19 for personalized, laminated ID Badge with Lapel
>Clip
> > __________ Optional: $15 for "Burch Liturgies", more than a dozen
>full-length ceremonies for Baptism, Marriage, Funerals, Etc.
> >
> > (Please print very clearly in dark ink)
> >
> > ---------------- Ordination Information ------------------------0317
> >
> > Name of Applicant:
> >
> > Academic Degree (if any):
> >
> > Address:
> >
> > City, State, Zip Code:
> >
> > Phone Number:
> >
> > Email Address:
> >
> > Religion:
> >
> > Denomination (if any):
> >
> > Preferred Title: (example Reverend, Pastor, Priest,  etc.):
> >
> > Ministry Area(s) of Interest (Congregational, Hospital, Prison, Marriage
>Officiating, etc):
> >
> > Website (if any):
> >
> > Although not required, by sending us a one-page writing of why you are
>seeking Ordination, you will guide us in supporting you in your ministry.
> >
> > ------------ If Paying Fee By Credit Card Use This
>orm  ----------------------------
> >
> > Name on Credit Card:
> >
> > Address:
> >
> > City/State/ZIP:
> >
> > Your email address:
> >
> > Type of Card, circle one:             Visa          MasterCard
>Discover
> > (Sorry, no American Express.)
> >
> > Credit Card Number:
> >
> > Date Credit Card Expires:
> >
> > Phone Number:
> >
> > Fax Number:
> >
> > ------------------------------------------------------
> > To be removed from our mailing list, fax address to 1-313-557-2776. Our
>understanding at the time of this mailing is that this is a legal form of
>marketing, similar to postal mail. Evidence otherwise is encouraged and
>requested via fax. We are doing our best to exclude those individuals who do
>not desire to receive materials of this type. Thank you for your
>consideration.
>
>
______________________________________________________________________
This list and all House of Fusion resources hosted by CFHosting.com. The place for 
dependable ColdFusion Hosting.

Archives: http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected]/
Unsubscribe: http://www.houseoffusion.com/index.cfm?sidebar=lists

Reply via email to