On Thu, May 12, 2022, 11:13 AM Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of Many <[email protected]> wrote:
> > > On Fri, Apr 29, 2022, 4:36 PM Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of > Many <[email protected]> wrote: > >> 2022-03-21 thru 2022-03-27: [X] Week 1 of Wim Hof Cold Protocol, 30 >> seconds cold water daily. Performed indoors. >> >> 2022-03-28 thru 2022-04-12: [ ] it simply got harder and harder to shower >> at all as I stretched the cold water time toward 1:30 in week 2 and >> discovered my water could be made colder than I had had it before >> >> 2022-04-14 thru 2022-04-15: [X] Custom protocol reacclimation, ramped up >> in five second intervals from 5 seconds to 30 seconds, every time I ate >> >> 2022-04-16 thru 2022-04-22: [X] Ramped up from 35 seconds through 60 >> seconds, in 5 second intervals, every time I ate >> >> > 2022-04-22 1930 ET: [X] 65 seconds >> >> >> 2022-04-23 1130 ET: [X] 1:05 >> >> Still harder than last month. But I'm feeling confident with my >> consistency. >> >> My funny experiences stepped in around when 60-65 seconds hit. I fumbled >> the timer and did it a few seconds longer than planned, and they came in >> and it felt really cold suddenly. >> >> 2022-04-23 1714 ET: [X] 1:05 cold water, indoors, no food, no cookie >> difficulty: easy-medium >> >> I thought I'd stop eating immediately with showering to get myself to do >> it, if it seemed reasonable, since the instructions said not to do the >> breathing it seemed there was likely value around not needing the food. >> >> In retrospect it was a bad time to stop a reinforcement because the first >> 4-5 timing devices I tried for measuring the time had mysteriously stopped >> functioning in some way or another. So I'm on the raspberry pi now instead >> of a phone, for editing this email. >> >> The shower wasn't too hard, but the difficulty timing it is worrisome. >> Gotta keep it smooth and continuing. I was happy going some seconds over >> the time. >> >> 2022-04-24 0907 ET: [X] 1:05 cold water, food after completion, indoors >> Difficulty: easy-medium >> >> Refraining from eating until afterward. >> >> It takes a little conscious effort to adapt to the cold water when it >> turns cold, which is interesting. >> >> Weather is warming and air is getting warmer. Thinking of keeping ice >> near the shower to cool the air a little. >> >> Upping time to 1:10 . >> >> 2022-04-24 1416 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors >> Difficulty: medium >> >> 2022-04-24 1809 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors >> Difficulty: medium >> >> I was anxious and stayed in the warm water first for some time. Then >> turned it cold and used that nascent willpower to handle the chill. >> >> The ability to direct my attitude around the temperature has been >> developing slowly and shakily. I've had a big problem with willpower; >> engaging it can cause psychotic issues. But here it's been gently growing >> in part of me, feeling different from the big issues. Very rare and hopeful. >> >> I got cold in the water and got goosebumps this time. The alarm went off >> and I tried to consciously engage the attitude thing again, and with huge >> relief succeeded this once on more of my own schedule. I stayed a few >> seconds past. >> >> I've been struggling in other diverse ways, but I was wondering if the >> chilliness was from adapting to warmer air as the weather warms. Not >> certain, as the water still feels warm compared to when it seemed colder >> than my earlier hot showers. >> >> 2022-04-25 1623 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors >> Difficulty: medium-easy >> >> I was thinking how warm it was and did this. I didn't use much warm water >> prior, which I consider for a reason it felt colder than usual. >> >> 2022-04-26 0710 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water, food after, indoors >> Difficulty: medium-easy >> >> The biggest issue was starting, which is still worrisome. >> >> I took a longer warm shower prior because I wanted to bathe. >> >> I stayed under some seconds after and got the icecream headache. >> >> It seems past time to up the length, but it's been a big struggle >> initiating it. Not certain. The cold water inhibition wants my food urge to >> separate from it, it's easier to eat prior than after. I was thinking of >> tracking when and how much I eat, to take migrating off it slowly and >> purposefully like the water. Unsure. >> >> 2022-04-26 1444 ET: [X] 1:10 cold water with food >> Difficulty: medium >> >> I had a very little food before, which helped immensely in starting. I >> then skipped the warm water mostly, and the cold water was very cold! >> Icecream headache quickly, goosebumps. >> >> I'm still thinking of just upping it to 1:15. >> >> -> entries from the 26th through the 28th lost due to editing gmail draft >> on multiple systems with intermittent connectivity. on the 27th I had only >> one meal. during most of the period I was struggling and confused. <- >> >> 2022-04-28 1119 ET: [X] 1:15 cold water with food after, indoors >> Difficulty: medium-easy >> >> I'm exploring developing a little willpower with regard to resisting the >> cold. This time I decided to try less hard and just get used to it, which >> seemed to work ok as well. >> >> 2022-04-28 1644 ET: [X] 1:15 cold water with food after, indoors >> Difficulty: medium-easy >> >> Still pretty cold, but easier to do. Upping to 1:20. >> >> 2022-04-29 0936 ET: [X] 1:20 cold water prior to food, indoors >> Difficulty: medium-easy >> >> I almost forgot to log this one. >> It was still very cold to start, but 1:20 seemed like a very short time. >> >> 2022-04-29 1117 ET: [X] 1:20 cold water prior to food, indoors >> Difficult: medium >> >> It got a little hard to log. >> >> I added some orange slices to my food which seems to help. Warming the >> food helps too. >> >> I was thinking of how close I am to being back to 1:30! Take it gently, >> be confident. >> > > 2022-04-30 0628 ET: [X] 1:20 cold water before food, indoors, easy-medium > > I had a rough day yesterday and for the first time this round ate without > showering. It is quite inspiring to do this again. > > 2022-04-30 1542 ET: [X] 1:25 before food, indoors, easy-medium > > It's almost easy, and I upped by five seconds ! > > Thinking on trying to move back to doing this in the morning without food, > quite unsure of this. Maybe the food is still important, unsure. > > 2022-04-30 1831 ET: [X] 1:25 before food, indoors, easy-medium > > 2022-05-01 0814 ET: [X] 1:25, indoors, easy-medium > > I figure I'll have a breakfast afterward and that will be my food. > > The shock at the start is finally getting easier again. > > I think I can up the time easily but I want to see if I can get back to > once a day without food. > > 2022-05-01 1104 ET: [X] 1:25 + 30, indoors with food, easy-medium > > It felt fun at some points again! Also I accidentally went 30 seconds over. > > I went outdoors and read the preface of the book. It turns out the > technique can help with autoimmune and possibly mental health issues. So > I'm trying to be a little more careful as thinking this could possibly > stimulate my inhibitions around it much more. > > When I went outdoors, I had heard it was 60+ degrees F. It felt like 60+. > Turns out it was supposed to be in the 40s, 60 was later in the day. I > didn't mind, I was in a t shirt! I kind of think there was a warmer area > here, but it could also be this practice making 40 feel like 60 to me. > > 2022-05-01 1532 ET: [X] 1:30, no immediate food, indoors, medium > > I left the water because I felt cold. I barely noticed I was doing this. I > got back under. Big icecream headache at the end. > > I took a long warm shower prior. > > Thinking of spending at least 5 days at 1:30, like the original protocol > recommended. > > Thinking of having a meal now, after. > > 2022-05-01 1854 ET: [X] 1:30 with food, indoors, medium > > It's funny that 1:30 is seeming so much colder than 1:25 when I did > 1:25+30 pretty easily, but this time I think it's probably because I'm > getting used to the sudden cold at the start, so I'm taking a shorter warm > shower prior. > > There's value around doing it slowly. A lot of variables can change, to > learn to adapt to. That is, assuming you have a psychotic dissociative > willpower disorder. > > 2022-05-02 0834 ET: [X] 1:30 cold water with food and cookie, indoors, > medium-easy > > I imagined that cold showers were harmful to the economy, and worried it > could get harder to continue, imagining this, I made it easier. I made warm > food, and had a cookie with the cold water. > > It's much easier at the start, when the water initially turns cold, and is > getting harder toward the end, where it used to be easy last week, around a > minute in. > > I accidentally went to leave the cold water again due to the cold, and had > to use my coping strategies to stay. > > Each part of you has different degrees of cold, depending on how you > expose it. I like focusing on my face, I think I sometimes feel discomfort > in my face during the winter and it would be nice to improve. > > 2022-05-03 1249 ET: [X+2] 1:30 cold water, indoors, with food > difficulty: medium-easy > > I didn't update for a few. > > It's getting easier as I persist. > > I often feel warmer in the icy water, than in the cool air before and > after, strangely. I might be shivering a little, and stop shivering during > the shower. Somewhat strange. Maybe partly psychological. > > 2022-05-03 1653 ET: [X] 1:30 cold water with food, indoors, medium-easy > > I've generally been chilly throughout the day, and experience > psychological pressure associated with that sensation. It's interesting to > do the showers during this. I might spend a little time in the warm water, > thinking it is to help me warm up, and then shift my thinking and turn it > cold, and have this chilly water, much colder than the air, feel much > easier to be covered in due to the familiarity of the experience. > > Still looking forward to having more strength to engage sensations of cold > outside of the cold shower. Often I imagine making time to read the book > more, but maybe I could find my own ways, too, unsure. > > Still gotta look up what that "horse stance" is, and resme the breathing > attempts. > > 2022-05-04 0824 ET: [X] 1:30 cold water with food and cookie, indoors > difficulty: easy > > it's still hard to start but no icecream headache this time or anything :) > > it is notable that the air is much warmer. i'm not entering it cold this > morning or anything, like I was earlier. > > 2022-05-04 1106 ET: [X] 1:35 with food and cookie, indoors, > difficulty:medium > > I did almost no warm water as I was in a rush. big icecream headache ! > somewhat invigorating again !! > > 2022-05-05 0815 ET: [X] 1:35 with food and sugar scone, indoors, > difficulty: easy > > I visited some doctors yesterday a side effect of which was my psychology > underwent a change, as it can. Things were working differently and I did > not eat supper yesterday. > > This morning the water didn't even feel cold. It was a little hard at the > start, the suddenness, but I didn't spend time in warm water first, and > then I didn't feel cold under the cold water. I was honestly wondering if > the cold water was still cold at all -- maybe the warmer weather had warmed > the water supply -- but it was morning, so that didn't seem that likely. > > It rained for a couple days the past two days, could relate to water > supply. > > Anyway it seems it makes sense to try to get back onto the week schedule > for this somehow, even if I still have the food crutch now. > > 2022-05-05 > I missed at least one 1:35 cold water here. Judging by the log looked like > I missed 2-3, strange. > > 2022-05-06 0917 ET: [X] 1:40+2:00 cold water, indoors, before food > > I've gotten a rash and took time in the cold water to bathe. > > I'm thinking that wim hof recommends 1-2 minutes _per day_ in this phase, > and showering too much could cause other issues. > > I'm going to try to drop the showers to 1/day, before I eat anything for > the day. > > 2022-05-06 1800 ET: [X] 1:40 cold water > > It's actually gotten quite hard not to do these. > > I was thinking of what the book said about vascular tissue, and how it > implied it is the change between warm and cold that is important, but also > how it said you can also go down to 50 deg F to get that change. > > Dunno. I took more of a warm shower and warmed parts of me up before > making them cold, thinking of this. This also made it psychologically > easier. I think it is more than just a thin layer of vessels on the skin. > There are a lot of layers of temperature within me. > > 2022-05-07 0713 ET: [X] 1:40 cold water > > Note: +5 seconds every 2-3 times is unreasonably slow with the goal of > once a day. Maybe raise to 15 seconds or such, 10-20. > > 2022-05-08 0707 ET: [x] 1:40 cold water with food after > > Bumping to 1:45 . There's only 20 seconds let to the goal of 2:00, so. > > 2022-05-07 or 08 : I think I did this a second time, and failed to note > it. Not sure. > > 2022-08-09: 1104 ET: [X] 1:45, easy but with trepidation and shock > > 2022-08-10: 0910 ET: [X] 1:45, easy > > Upping to 150. It's great this is finally getting easy again. Time > increases have been having a smaller impact after 1:35 or so. > > 2022-05-11: 1935 ET: [X] 1:50, medium-easy, very warm day, food after > > I didn't eat (or almost move) for most of the whole day. Finally I am > doing this before eating :) > > Upped the time to 1:55. Excited to do a week of 2:00 to move on to > whatever's next. > > 2022-05-12: 0659 ET: [X] 1:50, easy, warm day, with food. > > I ended up finding/using a way to charge my phone up some again to add > this to this draft. > > Erred and did 1:50 instead of 1:55. 1:55 next time. > > There's a lot of worry around experiencing difficulty doing this kind of > before I start. I think resumite sugar cookie could help with that. I'm out > of them. > > Regarding the warm days, I guess I'll have to deal with that come autumn. > > 2022-05-12: 1111 ET: [X] 1:50 again. hard. warm day, water very cold. > > It was so cold. I kind of stood there and focused on relaxing, and I think > I could have gone longer but it didn't feel nice this time for sure, > although on rethinking I can change that perception. > > I wonder if later in the day, after more water has run, the water can get > colder. > 2022-05-13 0707 ET: [X] 1:55, not very cold, with chocolate and food, warm day. easy. The water wasn't that cold again, so I stayed in an extra minute and left it running a trickle. When I started, it was a difficult space in my mind, at the edge of an inhibition, but with some power from the recent energy around upsetness. I'm lucky I made it. Something to try to repeat with more stability. 2022-05-14 1208 ET: [X] 1:55 colder water, food after. Running the water a trickle seemed to help the temperature. See if I can do a week of 2:00 . 2022-05-15 1349 ET: [X] 2:00 cold water, medium-hard 2022-05-16 1254 ET: [X] 2:00 water, medium-easy, food after The water didn't really feel cold. I'm a little worried about the warm weather. But it did feel somewhat cold. I let another faucet drip to try to cool it. 2022-05-18 0625 ET: [X] 2:00 cold water, medium. with food I was shivering _before_ I got in, so ran the water warm for a bit. 2022-05-19 1030 ET: [X] shower 4 day 5, 2:00 cold water, medium. with food. 2022-05-20 0840 ET: [X] shower 5 day 6, 2:00, easy, w/ food 2022-05-20 1459 ET: [X] shower 6 day 6, 2:00, medium-hard, w/ food water was much colder. I showered twice because of amnesia and confusion, I didn't realise. 2022-05-21 0957 ET: [X] shower 7 day 7, 2:00, medium-easy, food after i've been focusing on my face, since that's the most exposed part in the winter, but my face got easier and I noticed my arms and hands got cold and focused on them. my family has reynauld's syndrome (where your extremities get colder), so it's pleasant to think of strengthening them, which I have in the past. this is day 7 of 2:00 so I totally did it ! gotta find something new in that book. >
