On Sun, Jun 26, 2022, 8:56 AM Undiscussed Horrific Abuse, One Victim of Many <[email protected]> wrote:
> >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> 2022-06-09 - i started logging publicly to the > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> list > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> again. > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> i > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> started > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> by just logging time spent on planning and > >>>>>>> thinking about > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> it. > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> after > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> two attempts i was able to do it rather than > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> think > >>>>>>> about > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> it, with > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> effort. > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> 2022-06-09 0456 ET: [x] 10 seconds cold water > >>>>>>> after warm > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> water, > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> hard > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> 2022-06-10 1223 ET: [x] 10 seconds warm, 10 > >>>>>>> seconds cold. > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> easy. > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> food after. > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>> 2022-06-11 0553 [X] 10 warm 10 cold with food > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> 2022-06-11 1247 [x] 10w 10c food easy > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>> 2022-06-12 0217 [x] 9w 11c food after medium-easy > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>> 2022-06-12 0848 [x] 8w 13c food after medium-easy > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>> 2022-06-12 1852 [x] long w 13c food after > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>>>> medium-easy > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>> 2022-06-13 0922 [x] 8w 13c food after medium-hard > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >> 2022-06-13 1851 [x] long w 13c food after medium-hard > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> >> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> > 2022-06-14 0702 [x] medium w 13c with food > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> 2022-06-14 2019 [x] 8/20w 13/31c food after, medium-easy > >>>>>>> >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>>> 2022-06-15 0824 [x] 8+13/? c food after, medium-easy, > >>>>>>> outdoors > >>>>>>> >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>>>> 2022-06-15 1435 [x] 8+14/40c food after, irrational state > of > >>>>>>> mind, > >>>>>>> >>>>>> indoors > >>>>>>> >>>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>>> 2022-06-16 1502 69F 20/1:25cold 68F food after, easy, indoors > >>>>>>> >>>>> > >>>>>>> >>>> 2022-06-17 1051 21/1:04cold 67.4F food after, medium-easy, > >>>>>>> indoors > >>>>>>> >>>> > >>>>>>> >>> 2022-06-17 1929 unk warm, 22/1:20 cold, 58.8F, food after, > >>>>>>> >>> medium, > >>>>>>> >>> indoors > >>>>>>> >>> > >>>>>>> >> 2022-06-18 0921 53.7F 22/1:12 cold with food medium-hard > >>>>>>> >> > >>>>>>> > 2022-06-18 1653 53.7F 22/1:20 cold with hot food medium > >>>>>>> > >>>>>>> 2022-06-19 0736 56.4F 12/:30 cold + 22/1:15 cold with warm food, > >>>>>>> medium-hard > >>>>>> > >>>>>> > >>>>>>> 2022-06-20 0547 61.7F 22/1:36 with food and sugar cookie, hard to > >>>>>>> start, medium to do > >>>>>> > >>>>>> 2022-06-20 2029 22/1:23 65.3F with warmish food, medium-hard > >>>>> > >>>> 2022-06-21 0942 23/1:35 65.4F with warm food, sugar cookie, and > >>>> nutritional yeast, medium > >>>> > >>> 2022-06-22 1845 long warm + 30/2:30 cool 61.7F hard-easy, food after > >>> > >> 2022-06-24 0959 2:30 cool medium-easy with sugar cookie, food after > >> > > 2022-06-25 1501 24/unk cool then long warm then 24/unk cool > 2022-06-26 25/1:19 cool, medium-hard > 2022-06-26 1940 24/1:20 63.1F with food, medium-hard > I was cold, and I remember how I could engage internally to handle the > water, and did this in advance to try to feel warmer, and managed to get a > burat of warmth spreading through me, but tried so hard I caused a small > psychotic thing. It was very hard to enter, and I was worried I wasn't > eating making me colder. I heated two bowls of warm food and had one prior. > It was very hard to enter, and i shivered a little. It became a bit easier > staying in, a little unexpected, and by the count of 20 I seemed almost > fine with it. >
