Guru Beer?

  your are kidding me
ok I"ll go along with that: its Sunday and the server seems to be not
down.
thanks to internet that the Internet  proves me wrong - you are not
kidding

check this out
http://www.capscollection.ru/search.php?searchstr=brew&page=1
http://tinyurl.com/5s5oyv8
Here it goes:
Could not find anything from India but relayed telepathically from the
Beer Guru's temporary ashram at The Beerodrome, London to be on topic :

  and reincarnation


You always loved to imagine what its TV commercials would be like?Here
it is:
http://www.thebeerguru.com/buy-the-book/
with all your question answered:

    * From Beer to Eternity
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/2008/11/10/from-beer-to-eternity/>
    * Who are you calling a cult?
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/2008/10/09/who-are-you-calling-a-cult/>
    * The paramilitary extremist arm of the beer guru movement
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/2008/09/23/the-paramilitary-extremist-arm-of\
-the-beer-guru-movement/>
    * Is this a genuine spiritual path?
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/2008/09/23/is-this-a-genuine-spiritual-path/\
>
    * The Beer Guru's plan for world domination
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/2008/09/23/the-beer-gurus-plan-for-world-dom\
ination/>
    * Beer Yoga <http://www.thebeerguru.com/beer-yoga/>
http://www.thebeerguru.com/beer-yoga/

    * The Beer Guru and the Barmy(not Barry) Swami
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/about-the-beer-guru/>
    * The Teachings of The Beer Guru
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/the-teachings-of-the-beer-guru/>
    * The Way of The Beer Guru
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/the-way-of-the-beer-guru/>

"BEER IS DIVINE. DRINK IT RELIGIOUSLY."
  [180] For  those who understand that drinking beer can be a spiritual
experience,  following the path of The Beer Guru will be second nature.

Translated  from ancient Sanskrit scrolls found behind the tandoori oven
when The  Balti Towers restaurant in Birmingham was demolished, the
enigmatic Beer  Guru's teachings have become renowned.

They provide a  step-by-step guide that takes you on a quest for The
Holy Ale, a sacred  beer that flows from the Font of All Wisdom and
bestows infinite  knowledge, immortality and instant enlightenment.

If you survive  the initiation of the whirling pit, you will meet the
Beer Guru himself,  the Dalai Llager, the Beer Goddess and the Barmy
Swami.

You will learn how to create your own Beer Temple and master the art of
Tantric Beer drinking, so you can keep it up all night.

The  Beer Guru's Guide will give you a smile as broad as the Beer
Bhudda's,  for it is a path liberally strewn with mirth, joy and bliss.
Who are you calling a cult?
  Beer as a spiritual path, The joy of sects Author: The Beer Guru


Is this a genuine spiritual path?

Relayed  telepathically from the Beer Guru's personal chapel, in the
Temple of  The Beer Goddess, Kylie, somewhere in the Himalayas.

There  are disbelievers amongst us. Infidels, who raise doubts about the
validity of the Beer Guru's path and teachings. They do not believe that
beer can be sacred. That it can bestow enlightenment. Worse they scoff 
at the Beer Guru's teachings and say they are tosh. That he made them 
all up as a joke.

Actually, he did. But that doesn't make them  invalid, or nonsense. He
had tapped into the universal stream of  consciousness and wisdom. They
were an inspired joke founded on eternal  truths. As Zarathustra
demonstrated, there is a very fine line between  the wise man and the
fool.

There is plenty of hard evidence that much of The Beer Guru's teachings
are based on fact.

For  instance, there is a well-established historical link between beer
and  spiritual practices. In the distant past, as well as in many
indigenous  cultures today, beer was regarded as sacred, a brew which
brought  visions and personal experiences of the gods.

In mediaeval times,  most British and European beer was brewed in
monasteries by the monks.  As it says in the book, "many divine beers
(and some lethal intoxicants)  were created by men of god in places of
spiritual reverence".

There  is even a genuine, ancient Tibetan tradition of brewing and
drinking  the beer of enlightenment. It is part of the Doha Tradition
and includes  Tibetan drinking songs.

The Beer Guru's path is an evolution of  that tradition for modern times
and western society. There are many men  who worshipped beer before the
Beer Guru came along. He is merely giving  them a framework of belief
and practice in their daily religious  observances.

The Beer Guru's teachings have a firm foundation in  traditional mystic
practice. For him and his followers, enlightenment  and spiritual
devotion are inextricably tied up with drinking beer and  appreciating
it as a spiritual experience.

The book (the Beer Guru's Guide
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/buy-the-book> ) is a step-by-step
instruction manual of how to attain enlightenment through drinking beer.

As  an intrinsic part of that process, the initiate has to undertake a 
quest for the Holy Ale, the beer of enlightenment, which flows from the 
font of all wisdom. So it's a personal mystical adventure, a path of 
gnosis, or direct personal knowledge of the divine, and as with all 
Gnostic traditions, there's a long process where that knowledge has to 
slowly ferment in your soul to first become understanding … and 
eventually…wisdom.

You can just read it as a bit of a laugh. Or  you can take it seriously
and have some strange, wonderful and  enlightening experiences.
Who are you calling a cult?
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/2008/10/09/who-are-you-calling-a-cult/> Beer
as a spiritual path
<http://www.thebeerguru.com/category/beer-as-a-spiritual-path/> , The
joy of sects <http://www.thebeerguru.com/category/the-joy-of-sects/>
Author: The Beer Guru
Relayed telepathically from the Beer Guru's temporary ashram at The
Beerodrome, London.

Loyal  followers, we have been called a cult.  A Cult ? What a nerve.
Cults  are piddly little groups of misguided misfits blindly following a
heretical, charismatic and egotistical leader who is totally off his 
trolley (bit like political parties, innit?). The Beer Guru is wildly 
heretic, massively charismatic, egotistical and delightfully off his 
trolley, it is true. But his movement is not a petty cult. He is head of
a worldwide religion with millions of followers. Moreover, following 
his path promises eternal life, infinite wisdom and unlimited 
enlightenment. Not a suicide pact to make the end of the world a 
self-fulfilling prophesy.

The Way of The Beer Guru lays claim to  being the oldest religion in the
world. The religious adoration of beer  as a sacred fluid, has existed
for at least six thousand years. That's  about four thousand years
before Christ, who didn't touch a drop of beer  from one end of the
gospels to the other. His only encounter with  alcohol was the old Tommy
Cooper trick of turning water into wine (just  like that) at the Cana
wedding.

"PLONK IS FOR PLONKERS" The Beer Guru

Beer  might even be at the basis of modern civilisation. Seemingly, when
we  switched from hunter gatherers to farmers, squillions of years ago,
all  the smart academics thought it was to grow grains that make bread,
cakes  and other good grub.

New, more devious thinking now suggests that it was actually to make
beer.

No  surprise really. Beer is bigger than God. At  the last poll on the 
subject, only 59% of men said they believed in the existence of God, 
while 99% believed in the existence of beer.

"BEER IS BIGGER THAN GOD."  The Beer Guru.

The worrying element in that is the 1% who don't believe in the
existence of beer.

They must be a right bunch of little cults.

....

aaaaaa.......enjoy

now i am getting thirsty [:D]


The Author:Chris Street has been a mystic for many years. He is a Druid
He claims to be a member of a secret society, so secret, even he doesn't
know what it is
--- In [email protected], turquoiseb <no_reply@...> wrote:

> It also reminds me of the gift that a former roommate
> of mine brought me from India. He was there on a TM
> TTC course, and brought back a bottle of -- no shit --
> "Guru" brand beer. I kept it for years, and never
> opened it, because I always loved to imagine what
> its TV commercials would be like.
>
> Buncha gurus in their dhotis, trudge back to the
> cave after a long day preaching the dharma to the
> ignorant and undeserving, peel off the tops of their
> dhotis and sit around in their undershirts, drinking
> "Guru" beer and belching and enjoying the true rewards
> of enlightenment.  :-)
>

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