Thank you for implying I am a complete dimwit. I would agree with your assessment of 'lethal' and 'death threats', it is just on this forum, everything seems to be taken as being more real than it is, in spite of these disclaimers. Emily, (and Ann) seem to have the capacity to actually converse with Barry and Curtis on some points, and it would be a shame if they lost that capability by becoming more reactionary or antagonistic, regardless of how antagonistic Curtis or Barry might seem. That requires they transcend their psychological 'buttons'. You cannot soften these guys up emotionally, you need to find another approach.
--- In [email protected], "authfriend" <jstein@...> wrote: > > --- In [email protected], "Xenophaneros Anartaxius" <anartaxius@> > wrote: > > > > Emotional buttons are not real buttons, it is just a term > > to describe a person's conditioned responses to a situation. > > <duh> > > My point, and Emily's, was that Ann's "lethal" and my "death > threat" were both metaphorical in the same sense that "buttons" > is metaphorical. > > > > > We all have conditioned responses; some hard-wired, other learned. Our > > nervous systems are stimulus response machines. These conditioned responses > > have an intellectual component, and an emotional component. It is the > > emotional component that causes us problems in interpreting what is going > > on if a conditioned response is in play. The trick is to realise that one > > of these 'buttons' in us has been pushed and to notice what is happening, > > it is just a process of being more aware. This helps to dissolve or lessen > > the conditioned response. > > > > This is basically a process of accommodation which refers to part of the > > adaptation process. The process of accommodation involves altering one's > > existing schemas, or ideas, as a result of new information or new > > experiences. You must accommodate this new learning in order to ensure that > > what's inside your head conforms to what's outside in the real world. > > > > This requires one step back from one's own reaction, at least partially, > > without getting sucked in whole hog. For practice you can watch a > > newscaster whose views you despise, or listen to speeches by a candidate > > who is in a party different from yours. > > > > Button pushing happens when we get challenged. Barry and Curtis are good > > vehicles for this because they have an independence of thought that on this > > forum at least, is not universally popular. And Barry seems to have > > developed an additional career as a professional button tester. In order to > > get one's button's pushed, it is not necessary that the stimulus be true or > > false, it just has to trigger the conditioned response. > > > > --- In [email protected], Emily Reyn <emilymae.reyn@> wrote: > > > > > > Speaking of dramatic, Barry's titles usually speak for themselves. Â My > > > perception was that Ann used "lethal" in a literary context to describe > > > Curtis's ability to creatively, dramatically, and incisively "skewer" > > > said recipients he feels a perceived slight from, when he chooses - > > > astute fellow that he is described as. Â Curtis, you are a creative > > > writer, no doubt. The "power of words" in play.... Â > > > > > > > > > ________________________________ > > > From: authfriend <jstein@> > > > To: [email protected] > > > Sent: Sunday, April 1, 2012 8:09 AM > > > Subject: [FairfieldLife] ANOTHER DEATH THREAT (was Re: Fat, old drama > > > queens...) > > > > > > > > > Â > > > --- In [email protected], turquoiseb <no_reply@> wrote: > > > <snip> > > > > And I think that both Ann and Judy are doing the same thing > > > > on FFL, and that few other than Curtis, myself, and AZ are > > > > calling them on it. There was never any "death threat." > > > > Curtis's words were just words, not "lethal." And the > > > > histionics of a couple of women whose aversions cause them > > > > to get their emotional buttons pushed rather easily are > > > > never going to make any of these claims any less histrionic, > > > > or true. > > > > > > Barry always has been metaphorically challenged. He thinks > > > the people here he doesn't like (mostly women) have real > > > buttons. > > > > > >
