--- In FairfieldLife@yahoogroups.com, turquoiseb <no_reply@...> wrote: > > One of my good friends in Santa Fe was a psychiatrist who had, over the > course of his career, treated many individuals suffering from > Naricissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). When I met him, he had already > given up on psychiatric treatment, having been convinced over the course > of 20+ years that the condition was untreatable. But knowing of my > interest in the subject (caused by having studied with at least two NPD > spiritual teachers), he was willing to talk with me about his > experiences back when he *was* treating NPD, and some of the conclusions > he had drawn from those experiences. One of these conclusions seems > relevant to recent events on FFL, so I'll rap about it a little. > > The symptom he spoke of as the "#1 tip-off" that he was dealing with > someone with NPD was what he called "blame displacement." > > To explain a bit, NPD sufferers live in an illusory/delusory world > inside their own heads; they rarely, if ever, interact with reality as > it is seen by other people. Subjectivity "rules" for the NPD individual, > and they tend to sincerely believe that "how they see the world" > *equates* to "how the world is." > > So it is often a SHOCK to them when someone calls them on their own > antisocial or unethical behavior. According to my friend the shrink, > their *first* impulse at that point is to DENY it. They cannot accept > that the view of them being proposed by this other person could be > correct, because it contradicts their own internal, subjective view of > themselves. > > Their *second* impulse is to attempt to SHIFT THE BLAME for these > contradictory views of themselves. They call the person criticizing them > or their behavior "liars," and furthermore (and this is the tip-off) > claim that the critic *does not even believe what they are saying*, and > that they are *consciously* lying about them in an attempt to "get" > them. > > Now think back to recent discussions about what Robin did > when Vaj pointed out
(Barry means "claimed.") > that Robin had struck his students. First he DENIED it > vociferously, lying through his teeth the whole time. He didn't lie. As he said: "I did not deny something I knew was true. I denied what I was accused of." That's a fine distinction, but it's a valid one. > But second, he > attempted to SHIFT THE BLAME, and portray Vaj as the Bad Guy > In This Scenario, claiming that *he* was lying, and claiming > furthermore than Vaj even "knew" that he was lying. Classic > NPD behavior. Unfortunately, Barry, nobody who has read Robin's many posts here taking full blame for his misdeeds 30-some years ago is going to fall for this. Robin has very consistently portrayed himself as the Bad Guy in That Scenario, including in his Open Letter. That he resists taking the blame for something of which he feels he isn't guilty doesn't make him a narcissist. That's just not the way it works. If he claimed Vaj was lying, it was because he was convinced Vaj was lying. Vaj lied *routinely* on FFL, as well as being exceptionally abusive. He lied about me many times. He even lied about Ann, privately to you, and you got into hot water with Ann when you believed him and repeated his lie on FFL. > Next, think about Judy Stein, and her well-established > patterns on this forum. When faced with a critic -- someone > who calls her on her behavior in a way that contradicts her > internal view of who she is and what she's doing -- her > first impulse is to DENY the behavior. But her second is > *almost always* to attempt to SHIFT THE BLAME and claim > that the critic is not only lying, but *consciously* lying, > and doesn't "really" believe the thing he or she is saying > about her. Again, classic NPD behavior. > > We really DO believe the things we say about you, Judy. No, you don't, Barry. You don't even believe what you've just written (and appropriately so). > Your inability to comprehend or accept this is based on > your own disability -- Narcissistic Peronsality Disorder > -- not on some "superior" insight or intuition or > "seeing." Plain old deductive reasoning. > You cannot accept that we *really* see you this way > because it so strongly contradicts your view of > yourself. This is called Narcissism. It's called Barry Hates Judy and Will Say Anything He Can Think of to "Get" Her, even when he doesn't believe it himself. Barry, you're projecting. Pretty ironic that you try to project your own flaming narcissism onto others. (Is that the editorial or the royal "we," by the way? Or maybe the MPD "we"? Curious minds want to know.) > *Six and a half years* after you made your "Mel Gibson, > Christian bigot" post, you *still* cannot bring yourself > to say, "OK, I did it. I commented on a film I'd never > seen." You *still* have to equivocate, and pretend not > only that it never happened, but that Barry is "lying" > about it happening. > > It happened. The proof is here > (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FairfieldLife/message/126122 > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FairfieldLife/message/126122> ), and > it's incontrovertible. How do you explain your inability to admit it > *except* as an indicator of Narcissistic Personality Disorder? We'll > wait... You'll jolly well have to, won't you? As I said--this is the third time now--if anyone is interested, I'll be happy to refer them to the relevant posts from one or more (there have been at least half a dozen) of the past iterations of this dispute so they can see what's really at issue. Because goodness knows they aren't going to get the straight story from you. Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose. Barry Loses.
