another W.S. XXIX.
When, in disgrace with fortune and men's eyes, I all alone beweep my outcast state And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries And look upon myself and curse my fate, Wishing me like to one more rich in hope, Featured like him, like him with friends possess'd, Desiring this man's art and that man's scope, With what I most enjoy contented least; Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising, Haply I think on thee, and then my state, Like to the lark at break of day arising >From sullen earth, sings hymns at heaven's gate; For thy sweet love remember'd such wealth brings That then I scorn to change my state with kings. query Mr. Withers Smote: would you consider exchanging "yet" for "cake" based on this reading? ----- Original Message ----- From: "Roger Stevens" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> To: <[email protected]> Sent: Sunday, November 20, 2005 6:31 AM Subject: RE: RE: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote poem > A masterful analysis > > For me it has become another poem entirely > > > > It's a blog! http://rogerstevens.blogspot.com > > Wonky Finger - Live at Staplecroft Village Hall > Order your copy at http://www.rabbitpress.com > > Visit The Poetry Zone > http://www.poetryzone.co.uk > > > > > > > -----Original Message----- > From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > On Behalf Of suse > Sent: 20 November 2005 02:13 > To: [email protected] > Subject: Re: RE: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote poem > > using: > iambic, anapestic, trochaic, dactylic, spondaic, pyrrhic > and forgoing: > amphi anti bacchi, chori > crete and epi > > > Whip lick every entity: Lentils' heavy dick > > --Jack A. Withers Smote > > > With the sardines of your neighbors-----spondee, iamb, iamb, > trochee-----8-----a > those very pretty plastic balls like-----dactyl, spondee, spondee, > spondee-----9-----b > hosers on the shore strong models of your-----spondee, spondee, spondee, > trocheel, trochee-----10-----a > jungle verbiage in the cellphone lake-----trochee, dactyl, anapest, > dactyl-----10-----slnted b > Organ hand and legless jokes some-----trochee, spndee, trochee, > spondee-----8-----c > jackoff zoo with puddles of cough syrup you-----Pyrric, iamb, trochee, > iamb, > trochee-----11-----d > stirred the long mud clues and stacked-----trochee, trochee, trochee, > bum--7-----imbed? (in bed?) > gum smokes, the eggless hands and doormen-----spondee, iamb, dactyl, > spondee--9-----slnt c > Cake dome hell on the swim curbbage's bumbled-----trochee, trochee, > iamb, > dactyl.. spondee-----11-----e > glove your yodels snore the bomb closers-----trochee, trochee, dactyl, > spondee-----9-----slant b > petting every wall in spastic clothes: oh, spondee, spondee, spondee, > spondee, spon--dee-----10-----(slant ac) > neighing floor of hard beans: "the whip"!-----anapest, anapest, > Iamb!-----8-----f > After Blaster Al Ackerman's ---spndee--spondee--iamb, spondee-----8----g > "The Sardines of Your Neighbors"---iamb, iamb, dactyl-----7-----a > > From this primitive and limited scansion I'd say it is close to a > Shakespearean sonnett. A few beats added for pause or swallowed > syllables > and it's pert near solid, strange rhymees, but gallop it does --and > surely > it rhymes internally. The scansion reflects, of course, subjective > reading -- I am fondee of the spondee. tee hee. there are a few other > feet > in there--which i forwent? > > A right nice smote poem I'd say. > O! I gave a readingand it was grand--read with Matt Derby--check him > out! > suse > > > ----- Original Message ----- > From: "michael leigh" <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > To: <[email protected]> > Sent: Saturday, November 19, 2005 5:11 PM > Subject: RE: RE: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote poem > > > > Neglecting the meter will not affect your gas supply > > but poems will be charged for every therm used . > > Therm more than others. > > > > Michael > > > > > > --- Roger Stevens <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > > Of course > > > > > > I was neglecting that particular meter, fine and > > > noble as it is > > > > > > Silly me > > > > > > It's a blog! http://rogerstevens.blogspot.com > > > > > > Wonky Finger - Live at Staplecroft Village Hall > > > Order your copy at http://www.rabbitpress.com > > > > > > Visit The Poetry Zone > > > http://www.poetryzone.co.uk > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -----Original Message----- > > > From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > On Behalf Of JOHN BENNETT > > > Sent: 19 November 2005 14:16 > > > To: [email protected] > > > Subject: Re: RE: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote > > > poem > > > > > > These are Johnee sonnets, written in Johnee meter > > > etc! > > > John > > > > > > Dr. John M. Bennett > > > Curator, Avant Writing Collection > > > Rare Books & Manuscripts Library > > > The Ohio State University Libraries > > > 1858 Neil Av Mall > > > Columbus, OH 43210 USA > > > > > > (614) 292-3029 > > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > www.johnmbennett.net > > > > > > ----- Original Message ----- > > > From: Roger Stevens <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > > > Date: Friday, November 18, 2005 1:07 pm > > > Subject: RE: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote poem > > > > > > > Okay - the two short lines are released to float > > > amidst the three > > > > quatrains. fine > > > > > > > > And the ends of the lines rhyme, in a relaxed way > > > - in the > > > > Shakespeareanstyle actually - > > > > > > > > But what about the meter and the rhythm? Answer me > > > that! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It's a blog! <" > > > target="l">http://rogerstevens.blogspot.com> > > > > http://rogerstevens.blogspot.com > > > > > > > > Wonky Finger - Live at Staplecroft Village Hall > > > > Order your copy at <" > > > target="l">http://www.rabbitpress.com> > > > > http://www.rabbitpress.com > > > > > > > > Visit The Poetry Zone > > > > http://www.poetryzone.co.uk > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > <" target="l">http://rogerstevens.blogspot.com> > > > > > > > > -----Original Message----- > > > > From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > > On Behalf Of John M. Bennett > > > > Sent: 18 November 2005 15:16 > > > > To: [email protected] > > > > Subject: RE: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote poem > > > > > > > > Uh, it is a sonnet unless you define sonnet in > > > strictly narrow > > > > terms, as > > > > being only a "Shakespearean" or "Petrarchan". > > > This is one of > > > > Bennett'ssonnet forms, as seen by Smote. But it's > > > got the 14 > > > > lines, 3 quatrains, > > > > and a couplet consisting of the 2 short lines. A > > > fairly traditional > > > > sonnet in form in my book. Bennett is getting > > > reactionary perhaps? > > > > > > > > John > > > > > > > > At 05:23 AM 11/18/2005, you wrote: > > > > > > > > > > > > I don't wish to be pedantic (or maybe I do) > > > > > > > > Or maybe I'm missing something > > > > > > > > But this doesn't bear any relation to a sonnet. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -----Original Message----- > > > > From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [ <')" > > > >[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > > > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of John M. > > > Bennett > > > > Sent: 17 November 2005 21:07 > > > > To: [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > > Subject: FLUXLIST: Jack A. Withers Smote poem > > > > > > > > Smote sent me this, seems he's trying out my > > > recent "sonnet" form: > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whip > > > > > > > > > > > > With the sardines of your neighbors > > > > those very pretty plastic balls like > > > > hosers on the shore strong models of your > > > > jungle verbiage in the cellphone lake > > > > > > > > Lick every entity > > > > > > > > Organ hand and legless jokes some > > > > jackoff zoo with puddles of cough syrup you > > > > stirred the long mud clues and stacked > > > > gum smokes, the eggless hands and doormen > > > > > > > > Lentils' heavy dick > > > > > > > > Cake dome hell on the swim curbbage's bumbled > > > > glove your yodels snore the bomb closers > > > > petting every wall in spastic clothes: oh > > > > neighing floor of hard beans: "the whip"! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Jack A. Withers Smote > > > > > > > > After Blaster Al Ackerman's > > > > "The Sardines of Your Neighbors" > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________ > > > > Dr. John M. Bennett Curator, Avant Writing > > > Collection > > > > Rare Books & Manuscripts Library > > > > The Ohio State University Libraries > > > > 1858 Neil Av Mall > > > > Columbus, OH 43210 USA > > > > > > > > (614) 292-3029 > > > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > > www.johnmbennett.net > > > > ___________________________________________ > > > > __________________________________________ > > > > Dr. John M. Bennett > > > > Curator, Avant Writing Collection > > > > Rare Books & Manuscripts Library > > > > The Ohio State University Libraries > > > > 1858 Neil Av Mall > > > > Columbus, OH 43210 USA > > > > > > > > (614) 292-3029 > > > > [EMAIL PROTECTED] > > > > www.johnmbennett.net > > > > ___________________________________________ > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It's another blog! http://flobberlob.blogspot.com/ > > > > > > > > ___________________________________________________________ > > To help you stay safe and secure online, we've developed the all new > Yahoo! Security Centre. http://uk.security.yahoo.com > > > > > > > > > > > >
