Comments below.

On Wed, 2004-12-29 at 21:41 -0500, Henri Yandell wrote:
> 
> On Wed, 29 Dec 2004, James Mason wrote:
> 
> > Henri,
> >
> > Looks good. Big improvement, I think :). I especially like how the third
> > column brings more information "above the status bar". A few comments:
> 
> Thanks :)
> 
> > 1) The first paragraph sounds more like it's describing the ASF than
> > describing Jakarta. A suggestion:
> >
> > -------------------------
> > The Jakarta Project offers a diverse set of open source Java solutions
> > and is a part of [The Apache Software Foundation] (ASF). Like all ASF
> > [projects] Jakarta encourages a collaborative, consensus-based
> > development process under an [open software license].
> > -------------------------
> 
> It actually is meant to be describing the ASF :) To cut down on text, I 
> threw away 'jakarta, like all ASF, encourages...' to the simpler 'ASF 
> encourages'. It's just as true and uses less space. I'd like to dump 'for 
> all its projects' to be honest, but didn't want to lose the link to the 
> ASF Project page.
> 
> It's tempting to chop the last 4 words and add a ASF link on the right, 
> together with the other ASF ones, under a new heading of About Apache or 
> something.

How important is it to put the projects link right in text? I like the
way it reads without the last four words, so if it works to put the link
elsewhere I think it would be good.

> 
> > 2) The first sentence of the second paragraph seems awkward to me. It's
> > not immediately apparent why that information is useful. If I don't know
> > what a TLP is it doesn't really help me, and if I'm looking for a TLP
> > that used to be part of Jakarta it doesn't tell me how to find it.
> > Unfortunately I haven't been able to come up with a better wording.
> > Hopefully someone else is feeling inspired :).
> 
> Two big parts I'm looking for in this paragraph.
> 
> 1) Jakarta = umbrella project. I don't want to say umbrella as that's an 
> odd metaphor to the uninitiated.

How about "parent"?

> 
> 2) Definition of graduating, attempt at an explanation of why projects are 
> no longer to be found in Jakarta (a common user confusion I think). The 
> TLP acronym isn't highly important (at first I thought it was good to get 
> it accross, but it's too much info). Linking to the bit above, I could 
> dump the TLP acronym and make this the link to the ASF project page.

Hmmm... How about "Jakarta shepherds?? many [subprojects], many of which
have grown and [graduated] into top level ASF [projects]".

Some synonyms for shepherds: guides, oversees, supervises, watches over,
is responsible for.

I think it would be good to link to the list of graduated projects from
the text.

> 
> > 3) "Graduated" on the left needs to be in the context of a noun. Maybe
> > swapping the left and right columns (leaving "About" on the left) and
> > making the right column "Projects" with subheadings of "Subprojects" and
> > "Graduated"? That might take up too much space, though.
> 
> Gah! Much as I want to scoff at the suggestion for the pain it causes, I 
> think you're right, to be correct it should be a noun.
> 
> Putting the projects on the right was an option, but I think that 
> consumers will mostly want to click through to a subproject, rather than 
> any other link there and the LHS is the prime navigation spot.
> 
> It also matches the www.apache.org approach, which is nice for the 
> symmetry of a user clicking through and not having to adjust their 
> navigation flow.

Looking at apache.org, how about moving the About Jakarta section to the
right. This would parallel the Foundation section on apache.org.

What I was thinking of for projects is something like:

+----------------+
|=Projects=======|
+--Subprojects---+
| * Alexandia    |
| * etc...       |
+--Graduated-----+
| * Ant          |
| * etc...       |
+----------------+

I have two concerns with this: It takes up more space and nothing else
uses subheadings. It does put Graduated into context with a noun,
though.

> 
> Possibly I could change Graduated to Graduated Subprojects? Seems a bit 
> long. 'Graduates' seems wrong. Looking for a good label here :)
> 
> > 4) Removing the margin from the <ul> that makes up the news would help
> > spread that section out a bit.
> 
> Yep. I'm going to hassle a few web designers I know on spacing issues once 
> I've updated the XSL build to output this site. All their suggestions will 
> involve CSS, so I'll need to have a CSS sheet by then I suspect.

If you need a hand here, let me know. Part of my day job is web design.

-James

> 
> Thoughts?
> 
> Hen


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