This is long. I will not reply. All is said, but a decent read if you take the time.
On Tue, 11 Apr 2017 11:18:58 +0200 > > You're saying that nobody really knows you, have you considered > spending some time to reflect on how you present yourself on this > mailing list and other communication channels? Addressed below, out of order > Maybe taking another > few minutes writing an email can get your message across in a way > that seems more constructive? Pure volume and repetition of issues > surely doesn't benefit anyone, and quickly becomes boring. What some perceive as volume; is simply me replying to replies to my posts. I do not tend to reply when people are talking to others. I let them have their conversation. Another mentioned that someone else started a topic then seemed to lose interest. Seems you could be accused of the same if not posting enough or stopping on a thread you started. If I said something to a group or individual in person. Then someone replied. I would not ignore their reply. That is rude and disrespectful.What others see as noise is me being polite and replying to those who have replied to my post. It is not trying to get the last word. It is simply being polite as I would in person. I would not walk away mid discussion. Would you in person? Think on that for a moment, and it should logically explain volumes of mail. It also takes two to tango.... Not like I am sending repeat posts that have no replies. talking to myself, etc. That would be spamming, one way posting. Discussions are not spam. Though can annoy and be unwanted for some. Why email clients have a DELETE button, and also a nifty feature called Filters. Do not like me. Filter any of my posts to trash. If you are not doing that. They you prove my point further down. That said, to address the first part; Mailing lists are a HORRIBLE way to get to know someone. I would NEVER assume anything about a another based on posts to a mailing list. Even IRC and other things are not really that much better. I know better!!! To get to know someone a person needs to take considerable time interacting with them. Not a single person around here actually interacts with me or works with me. It is not up to me for others to get to know me. That is for them. I work with other projects without any issues... Any issue I have is unique to Gentoo and its rude and insulting, disrespectful community. I purposely live and keep a private life for a reason. I do not do social media etc. I have neighbors, who for years who made incorrect assumptions. They could have approached and gotten to know me at any time. When one did, they realized they were VERY wrong. They lived near me for over a decade with incorrect assumptions. Horribly incorrect! It is not my responsibility, nor do I need to spend my time, for another to get to know me. That is their choice. Thus I do not need to go out of my way to make myself known. This same thing has happened at my local LUG. People made complete incorrect assumptions causing a problem. When we met to resolve things in person. Their first impression and comment was; Man did I get you all wrong. I came here with one mindset. Soon as I saw you and we greeted. It went out the window. That happens all the time. We never discussed the problem. They realized they were wrong the second we met... Problem went out the window.... They expected to meet one person and another showed up... ME!!! Not who they thought I was... Things in life are not always what they appear to be. People think I drive others way. But in reality its the opposite. Recently in talking in IRC others showed up in a dead channel. At my LUG my presence is frequently requested. Though I rarely attend, in part due to a falling out. Which the meeting previously mentioned mended. Though since I was mistreated due to incorrect judgment in my own local community. It changed my involvement and interest in that group. For their loss more than mine. Same applies to Gentoo. These are lessons learned over time. I do know I am a pot stirrer and that is a good thing. Even if cooking all day in a crock pot. At some point things need to be stirred. That is one thing that is accurately known and I acknowledge and embrace. That said, I have met many gentoo devs in person. Sadly most of them have moved on. Though some are still around. I have met Robbin/robbat2 in person. Though it was years ago and I doubt he recalls my personality much. He did not go down to San Jose and other things. Though did go out to dinner with the Gentoo crew from LWE. Robbin and I have VERY different personalities. I am not your typical Tech personality type. I represented Gentoo in person at the Gentoo booth, as an official representative of the Gentoo Foundation, several times at LWE in San Francisco. That was the largest event Gentoo has ever had a presence at to my knowledge. Thousands of people. We would interact with Gentoo related vendors like OpenGear who tooks us out drinking. I am really good at such things. Because despite what people around here assume. I have really good people skills. Dealing with people in person and online is different. I am also NEVER approached in person as I am online. The things people say and how they act towards me in Gentoo. They would never in person. That is part of it. People feel empowered in ways they would not. Hiding behind a keyboard. Saying things to another's face is quite different. Not meaning violence or anything. Just in actually looking someone in the eye when your insulting them, disrespecting, etc. Not to mention other people tend to react different when they see such in person. Now not to boost, but I was one of the funner ones of the LWE Gentoo group. I was more outgoing, social, cracking jokes, and surprise surprise talking etc. I talk even more in person than I type.... Vapier/Spanky/Mike Frysinger and I got along really well. He is hilarious and a really fun guy. You will never have an idea about that guy either if you do not meet him. Him like myself comes off VERY different via digital mediums, lists, etc. Even those who harrassed me on the foundation lists and caused me to resign as a trustee. I stayed the night at their place one night and invited them to a relatives home in Northern California. Even then ended up treating me in ways I would not then. Though again in person next year at LWE. they would NOT come speak to me after what they did to me.... They were embarrassed as I was walking and talking to another Gentoo developer we both new and were friends with. When I first showed up on -project making noise last fall. Vapier/Mike sent me an email asking if I was going to go to SCALE. Which I replied but my reply I think ended up in spam or junk folder he never got it. Knowing that, I decided to not go to SCALE. I do not really feel close enough to the Gentoo community as I did for LWE. When I first went to LWE it was to meet my mentor, Josh Nichols, who works for Github now days. It was due to the relationships built as part of the Java team then. Times were very different. If Gentoo was then like it is now. I would never have become a developer. The people were nicer, more welcoming, etc. It is why Gentoo WAS one of, if not the fastest growing FOSS project in its early days. When people make assumptions about others based on posts to a mailing list etc. It seems they may have a limited view of the world and lack of world experience. The more you travel, learn other cultures, etc. You learn not to assume about others. Cultures alone can be very different. You also learn respect is a VERY big thing. In the US in my area and others. Lack of showing respect can result in violence. In business lack of respect can really be costly just the same. In Asian cultures, respect is HUGE. Not knowing me aside. My biggest gripe around Gentoo is how people treat each other. How others approach me and the things they say I would never. I do not go off instructing others how to conduct themselves. Making assumptions about their knowledge etc and being critical or flat out insulting. But all around interaction with people you do not know. I would never approach someone I did not know the ways I am approached. I see it happening to others so its not unique to me at all. It is the present Gentoo culture, and horrible unfriendly atmosphere around the community. One I have mostly been absent from. It really blows my mind sometimes the comments people make. I routinely think "Who does this person think they are". The nerve of some people. To think they are so high and mighty to preach to another, tell them how to conduct themselves, etc. I live by the golden rule, and most all that has been done to me. I would never to do to others. I would not stand for those things for to be done to anyone. No on deserves such. Nor do I believe those doing such things would feel the same if things were reversed. C'est la vie.... -- William L. Thomson Jr.
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