How about just having a standard authorized text of a reply
for these sorts of things (which I would personally prefer
should have a sentence that politely encourages courtesy
on the part of the complaining person, since two wrongs don't
make a right)?  Then whoever saw
it first could just paste that and hit send, since apparently
some of the complainers are too stubborn to click on a URL
without receiving some explanation as to why that's their
best starting point.

I see that google groups is getting rid of welcome message
support.  It's not clear to me whether that means that
existing ones will simply be frozen, or will eventually go away
entirely.  If the latter, I imagine the noise level here will only rise.

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