Yes Lee, the key is that you helped yourself change.  You are the one
who did it.  People can offer their advice and try to assist one into
becoming a better person, overall it's the person that will make the
change.

But then again as I write this, I do have something contradictory to
the thought.  The power of influence and peer pressure does also
affect a person's behavior.  They say if you walk with a bunch of
geese you will soon grow feathers.  The idea works either with
negative or positive peer influence.  I'm not saying everyone is
affected by the group, but few are not.

I know what growing up in a big family was like, we all change as we
grow up.  The ones that don't are the ones we worry about.

Allan,

Sheltered in what way?  The countryside?  I've lived in many places
including Jerusalem, I know with age I'll grow wiser, but I've seen
much and can adapt to any type of living.  Although I grew up in the
city, I was pretty much raised as a farm girl, believe it or not.  My
parents unwillingness to purchase manufactured food products, taught
us how to make cheese, yogurt, churn butter, grow herbs and
vegetables, wash clothes by hand, they were very stubborn.  As far as
sheltered, location wise, yes.  People wise, no.  NY being the melting
pot that it is, offers an introduction to an array of ethnic people
and races.  You learn from others, like us, people practiced their
traditional home style life.  But there is a danger to the mix of
ethnicities, a large lack of trust amongst people, which leads to
crime, poverty, and racism.  I've seen quite a few disturbances.
Girl's getting their faces razored by other girls, one girl carved her
initials onto the forehead of another girl, a woman shoved onto the
train tracks, druggies taking shots, a guy walking barefoot through
the streets enraged carrying a shotgun, destructive car chase which
hit three ppl walking on the sidewalk, robbery, organized crime rings,
people jumping out of 3rd floor apt buildings due to a fire, domestic
violence (a man once dragged a woman down the exterior stairs by her
hair, noone did anything fear of getting harassed by him), I've seen a
girl getting raped on the school staircase I told the school guard, it
was hard living there as a teenager.  Today's crime has decreased in
comparison with the early nineties, but I wouldn't want to live there
again.  My parents own two homes in Brooklyn, I do love to visit.

Now there are also positive things to growing up in the city.  Gain of
street smarts, kids there tend to be more alert as their interaction
with others is plentiful (they'll buy you and sell you at the same
time), fearlessness, and an acceptance of other's that are different.
One can't forget the development of ethnic subcities, such a China
Town, Little Italy, the Russian District, I also noticed how a part of
Bay Ridge has evolved into a huge Middle Eastern section, that's
something new to me.  I haven't lived there since 95.  But I'll never
forget it.  Boy did I ramble.

On May 6, 4:30 am, "[email protected]" <[email protected]> wrote:
> I have to disgree with that Rosey.
>
> Isn't it the very fact that we can overcome our base behviours that
> seperates us somewhat from all the other animals?
>
> I'm the oldest of 16 children and in my youth I used to bully my
> siblings something rotten.  One day after giveing some thought as to
> the consequences of my action upon my younger siblings I decided to
> change my ways, and change them I did.
>
> We certianly do have the ability to 'help ourselves' I would say that
> rather it is harder for the individual to contemplate their Selves, in
> an effert to understand their short comings than it is to attempt to
> change them.
>
> On 5 May, 16:32, Rosey <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>
>
> > I must agree with Chris.  Humans are born selfish, they can't help
> > themselves nor do they have the ability to.  They only have reliance
> > on what others can provide for them.  Doing good for others is taught
> > and slowly learned.  They say by the age of three a child's behavioral
> > pattern is established and cannot be changed, only influenced.
>
> > On May 5, 11:11 am, Chris Jenkins <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > > Why do you think this? The basic nature of an animal is to amass 
> > > resources and procreate. Kindness and altruism is a learned social 
> > > behaviour, not a core trait.
>
> > > [ Attached Message ]From:iam deheretic 
> > > <[email protected]>To:[email protected]:Tue, 5 May 2009 
> > > 10:15:37 +0200Local:Tues, May 5 2009 4:15 amSubject:[Mind's Eye] Re: The 
> > > Way it is Now
>
> > > Personally I think people are very good and kind , it is built into their
> > > core being and no escaping it,, the real problem comes from the few who 
> > > for
> > > their own gain what ever the reason turn away from this basic goodness and
> > > create the hardships and problems that are commonly labled as evil.
> > > Allan
>
> > > On Tue, May 5, 2009 at 9:56 AM, ornamentalmind 
> > > <[email protected]>wrote:
>
> > > > Of course if one is looking for a collective mentality…it is already
> > > > here. If one isn’t aware of it, then yes, one most likely is
> > > > manifesting some of what you call negative aspects. This is why the
> > > > only way to this full unity is through full and totally transcendental
> > > > introspection. Until the psyche is clarified, the confusion, illusion,
> > > > hatreds, disillusionments etc. will be all that is seen.
>
> > > --
> > > (
> > >  )
> > > I_D Allan- Hide quoted text -
>
> > - Show quoted text -- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
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