On Jun 29, 2010, at 11:38 AM, Arlo Bensinger wrote:

> [Marsha]
> Marsha processes all kinds of patterns.  She processes millions of patterns 
> in a single day, some intellectual, some not.  I am not an intellectual;  I 
> am not a single definition of anything.  I'm not even a grandmother.  Can you 
> even consider what it is not to attach to such superficial 
> self-identification.  I'm this.  I'm that.  What utter ridiculousness!
> 
> [Arlo]
> This is quite a tangent from my point, but...
> 
> If you are not attached to "superficial self-identification", why do you sign 
> all your posts "Marsha"?


Convention.   


> 
> I'd never say you are "one thing" and forever trapped in that definition. 
> Even as a "son" or "father", that role changes over the course of a lifetime. 
> But to claim that you are totally free from being "this" or "that" is utter 
> ridiculousness. When you daughter calls you, do you tell her "I don't have a 
> daughter, and I am not a mother"?

I may mother (verb), but I'm not a mother.



> What would the point of that be? I am not sure if your mother is still with 
> you, but if she is or when she was, did you tell her "you are not my mother 
> because I am not a daughter"?

I may receive mothering or behave as a daughter, but I am neither mother nor 
daughter, and I realized if I use those labels they are used by convention in a 
temporary situation.   


> Do you tell your grandchildren you are not their grandmother because you are 
> not this and not that? If they are not your grandchildren, why do you treat 
> them differently than any other child that age you come across?

I don't have such conversations with my grandchildren, and I tend to like all 
little children.  I hope the one I am interacting with gets my attention.   Of 
your daughter was living in my home, I would hope I act towards her in a loving 
way.


> When you sign all your posts "Marsha", there is a stable pattern of 
> identification, a desire to thread consistency through your posts, that is 
> the pointer "Marsha".

Any consistency is imagined.  And I bet if you went through all my posts  you 
would find mostly inconsistency.  


> You are not an intellectual because you've been assigned that label, you are 
> an intellectual because you enjoy the activity of philosophy, of thinking 
> about metaphysical issues, of playing with patterns of thinking.

I do enjoy such mental activity, but I am not an intellectual.


> It is not more derogatory a label than "mother", which you affirm every time 
> you nurture and console and teach and support and raise and advise and love 
> and provide for your child. "Grandmother" is not an artificial trap of some 
> kind, it is a testament to your activity.

These are short-lived activities.  I am not attached to them as a label.  I am 
not this and not that.  Scratching my nose is an activity.   Walking.  Reading. 
 Painting.  Cooking.  Peeing.  The list is endless.  Which are important enough 
to categorize me? Well I don't want that kind of importance.  I am as much 
non-intellectual as an intellectual, more even.  Do you remember the last scene 
in LILA?  I am swirling with the delight of not being anything.  -  Well, at 
least working towards it as best I can.   


Marsha
 
 
 
 





































































 
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