[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (non)

2005-03-10 Thread TIDE1
>
Groaner #1 of 2...

There are two Mexicans who have been lost in the desert for weeks and
they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the
form of an oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the
heat haze, a tree off in the distance.

As they get closer they can see that the tree is draped with rasher upon
rasher of bacon. There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life giving juicy
nearly-raw bacon, all sorts.

"Hey, Pepe" says the first bloke "Ees a bacon tree! We're saved!"

"You're right, amigo!" says Pepe. So Pepe goes on ahead and runs up to
the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But as he gets to within
five feet of the tree, there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is
shot down in a hail of bullets.

His friend quickly drops down on the sand and calls across to the dying
Pepe.

"Pepe! Pepe! Que pasa, hombre?"

With his dying breath Pepe calls out,

"Ugh, run, amigo, run! Ees not a Bacon Tree!

Ees a... Ees a..."

"Yes, Pepe? Ees a what..?"

"Ees... a... ham bush."
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Groaner #2 of 2...

"Mint Flavored Birth Control Pill"

The Cadbury's Candy Co. and Merck Drug Co.
Have combined to market the new Mint flavored birth control pill that
women may take immediately before sex.

The Pill will be distributed by the large major drug store chains and
Wal-Mart's Pharmacies.


They're going to be called

"Pre - dick - a - mints". 
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

NO, I'm not sorry. Cheers -vo-





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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (non)

2004-08-20 Thread TIDE1

"BARNER FAN PREPS FOR SEASON"

Follow this guy and see what he eats...???



RollTideRoll - Cheers...  -vo-



http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_365440.html?menu=
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2004-01-09 Thread TIDE1

. . . . Math Tests . . . .
 
Math is Hard

Last week I got a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter girl took
my
$2 and was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket
and
gave it to her. She stood there, holding the nickel and 3 pennies, while
looking at the screen on her register.
I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me back two
quarters, but she hailed the manager for help and while he tried to
explain
the transaction to her, she stood there and cried.

Why do I tell you this? Read on...
 
Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price.
What is his profit?
 
Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80.
What is his profit?
 
Teaching Math in 1970:
A logger exchanges a set "L" of lumber for a set "M" of money.
The cardinality of set "M" is 100.
Each element is worth one dollar.
Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set "M."
The set "C", the cost of production, contains 20 fewer points than set
"M."
Represent the set "C" as a subset of set "M".
Answer this question:
What is the cardinality of the set "P" of profits?
 
Teaching Math in 1980:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20.
Your assignment:
Underline the number 20.
 
Teaching Math in 1990:
By cutting down beautiful forest trees, the logger makes $20.
What do you think of this way of making a living?
Topic for class participation after answering the question:
How did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down the
trees?
There are no wrong answers.
 
Teaching Math in 2000:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100.
His cost of production is $120.
How does Arthur Andersen determine that his profit margin is $60 ?
 
Teaching Math in 2005:
El hachero vende un camion carga por $100.
La cuesta de produccion es...
**

Well, maybe it's not a "Groaner" after all?

Cheers -VO-

http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/VOSOS/


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-12-19 Thread TIDE1

Missed last week, so you must suffer thru "two stupid groaners" this
week. Y'all can forgive me this one time because it's the ...
*HOLIDAYS*...

...

Groaner for Friday, 19 Dec 03...

Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the
beautiful Queen's voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this
would be death.

One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the
Physician, who was the King's chief doctor. Horatio the Physician
exclaimed that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy
his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it.

Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to the scheme.

The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and
poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed.  Soon
after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident,
Horatio
the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if
applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had
shown that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer would work as the
antidote to cure the itch. The King quickly summoned Nick the Dragon
Slayer.

Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote
for  the itching powder, which he quickly put into his mouth, and for
the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous
and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved,
and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and touted as a hero.

Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the
Physician demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins.  With his
obsession now satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer
couldn't have cared less and, knowing that Horatio the Physician could
never report this
matter to the King, shooed him away with no payment made.

The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same
itching powder into the King's loincloth. The King imediately
summoned  Nick the Dragon Slayer...
 
... MORAL OF THE STORY: Pay your bills!

..

Groaner for Friday, 12 Dec 03...

> >Hippie Love
> >A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat.
The
> >hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would make love to him. The
nun
> >surprised by the question politely declines and gets off the at the
next
> >stop.
> >When the bus starts on it's way the driver says to the hippie, "I can
tell
> >you how you can get that nun to make love to you." The hippie says
that
> >he'd
> >love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening
at
> >midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and prays to God. "If you went
> >dressed
> >in a robe and a glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are
God and
> >you could command her to make love to you."
> >The hippie decides this is a great idea, so that Tuesday he goes to
the
> >cemetery and waits for the nun to show up. At midnight sure enough
the nun
> >shows up and begins praying the hippie jumped out from hiding and
says. "I
> >AM GOD! I have heard your prayers and I will answer them, BUT ...
first you
> >must make love to me." The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she
> >might
> >keep her virginity because she is married to the church. The hippie
agrees
> >to this and has his way with the nun.
> >After the hippie finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and
shouts,
> >Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the hippie!"
> >Then the nun jumps up and shouts, "Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the bus driver!"

..

"Holiday Cheers" to all of you fine *BamaFans* -vo-





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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-12-05 Thread Joe Goodson
ROTFL!
Joe
"We have the sweetest, finest bunch of kids in the world, and I love
every one of them, but they're not tough enough. If we don't get some
sure-enough, way-down-deep meanness, we're not going to beat anybody." -
Alabama legend Bear Bryant.

- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, December 05, 2003 3:34 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)



"2 losers 2 day"
.

* GOLF *

A foursome is waiting at the men's tee while another foursome of ladies
are hitting from the ladies tee. The ladies are taking their time and
when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10
feet, goes over to it and hacks it another 10 feet. She looks up at
the men, who are watching, and says apologetically: "I guess all those
f**king lessons I took this winter didn't help."

One of the men immediately replies, "Now, you see, that's your problem -
you should have taken golf lessons instead."

.

* Money Exchange *

An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with
2000 yen and walked out with $72.

The following week he walked in with 2000 yen and was handed $66. He
asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.

The teller said, "Fluctuations."

The Asian man stormed out and just before slamming the door, turned
around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"

Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-12-05 Thread TIDE1

"2 losers 2 day"
.

* GOLF *

A foursome is waiting at the men's tee while another foursome of ladies
are hitting from the ladies tee.  The ladies are taking their time and
when finally the last one is ready to hit the ball she hacks it about 10
feet, goes over to it and hacks it another 10 feet.  She looks up at
the men, who are watching, and says apologetically: "I guess all those
f**king lessons I took this winter didn't help."

One of the men immediately replies, "Now, you see, that's your problem -
you should have taken golf lessons instead."

.

* Money Exchange *

An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York City with
2000 yen and walked out with $72.

The following week he walked in with 2000 yen and was handed $66. He
asked the teller why he got less money that week than the previous week.

The teller said, "Fluctuations."

The Asian man stormed out and just before slamming the door, turned
around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!"

Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-11-28 Thread TIDE1

A funny repeat.

Subject: Mailman Bill's Last Day
 
It was mailman Bill's last day on the job after
35 years of delivering the mail through all kinds of weather.
 
When he arrived at the first house on his route, the whole family came
out, roundly congratulated him, and sent him on his way with a tidy gift
envelope.
 
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.
 
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing
lures.
 
At the next house, he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful
woman in a revealing negligee.  She took him by the hand, and led him
up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most
passionate love he had ever experienced.  When he'd had enough, they
went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes,
ham, sausage, blueberry waffles and fresh-squeezed orange juice.  When
he was truly satisfied, she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.  As
she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the
cup's bottom edge.
 
"All this is just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the
dollar for?"
 
"Well," she said, last night, I told my husband that today would be your
last day, and that I wanted to do something special for you.  I asked
him what to give you.
He said, 'Screw him.  Give him a dollar.'"
 
"Breakfast was my idea."

Cheers -VO-


http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/BestBS


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-11-21 Thread TIDE1

Subject: "A Little Pink One" 

A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door
of an erotic sex shop. 

Obviously very unstable on her feet, she shakily hobbles the few feet
across the store to the counter. Finally she arrives at the counter,
grabbing it for support. 

She asks the sales clerk: "Dddodo yyou sssell dildosss?" 

The clerk, politely trying not to burst out 
laughing, replies: "Yes we do have dildos. Actually we sell many
models." 

The old woman then asks: "D yyyo e aaa itttlee
pppinkk one, tttenn inche lllong aaandd aabboutt tttwoo inchesss
thththiiickkk?" 

The clerk responds, "Yes we do". 

Cca o tttelll  o  ttturrrnnn
ttthe uuinggg ttthin off?" 
__

*RollTideRoll* - Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-11-14 Thread TIDE1

*2 STORIES* - - - - -  (Anybody we know?)
 
"Stranded" 

A redneck, a sheep, and a dog were survivors of a terrible shipwreck.
They found themselves stranded on an unknown island. After being there a
while, they got into the habit of going to the beach every evening to
watch the sun set. 

One particular evening, the sky was a fiery red with beautiful cirrus
clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle; a perfect night for romance. 
As they sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to the
redneck. Soon, he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it.
But the dog got jealous, growling fiercely until the redneck took his
arm from around the sheep. After that, the three of them continued to
enjoy the sunsets together, but there was no more cuddling. 

A few weeks passed by and lo and behold, there was another shipwreck.
The only survivor was a beautiful young woman, the most beautiful woman
the redneck had ever seen. She was in a pretty bad way when they rescued
her, and they slowly nursed her back to health. 

When the young maiden was well enough, they introduced her to their
evening beach ritual. It was another beautiful evening: red sky, cirrus
clouds, a warm and gentle breeze; perfect for a night of romance. 

Pretty soon, the redneck started to get "those feelings" again. He
fought them as long as he could, but he finally gave in and leaned over
to the young woman, cautiously, and whispered in her ear... "Would you
mind taking the dog for a walk." 
.

"Advice from Grandpa" 

This touched me. This once again confirms that the most important
information in your life won't come from a teacher, the library or the
internet, but from a mentor and on a very personal level. 
My long-passed grandfather's birthday is coming up, and for me it is a
time to reminisce about the long walks we used to take. The long drives.
The special trips he would make to pick me up so I could spend weekends
with him, and the advice he used to give! 

Much was wasted because I was young when he died. If he were alive today
and sharing his gems of wisdom, I'd be a better man. Those gems were
well and good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of
grandfatherly advice, came when he paused, looked me in the eye and
said, "Son ... don't marry a woman with big hands. It makes your pecker
look smaller."
.

"RollMightyTideRoll"
 BAMA 24 - LSU 20

Cheers -VO-


http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/BestBS


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-11-07 Thread Joe Goodson
Jungfrau (sp?)
;-)
Joe
Success is to be measured not so much by the position one has reached in
life, as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed.
Booker T. Washington
- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, November 07, 2003 10:29 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)


>
> Q: How do you say "Virgin" in German?

>
> Cheers -VO-
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-11-07 Thread TIDE1

Q: How do you say "Virgin" in German?

A: "Fitzgutentite"

.

Well, at least it was short this time. Don't forget - "Old Age and
Treachery will overcome Youth and Skill"

*RollMightyTideRoll*

Cheers -VO-


http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/BestBS


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-10-31 Thread Jeff Todd
BHHWWWA

Slef E.

[EMAIL PROTECTED]

- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Cc: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2003 10:48 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)



Barbra Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American
Indians.

After a tour of a reservation they were on, she was curious as to the
number of feathers in the headdresses.

She asked a brave who had only one feather in his headdress. His
reply was, "one feather, one
squaw."

She asked another brave, feeling the first fellow was only joking.
This brave had four feathers in his headdress. He replied,
"Four feathers,
four squaws."

Still not convinced the number of feathers indicated the number
of squaws involved, she decided to interview the Chief. Now the
Chief had a headdress full of feathers which, needless to say, amused
Ms. Walters.

Ms. W: "Why do you have so many feathers in your headdress?"

Chief: "Me Chief, fuck-em all, big, small, fat, tall, fuck-em
all."

Ms. W: "You ought to be hung!"

Chief: "Damned right, me hung. Big like buffalo, long like snake."

Ms. W: "You don't have to be so hostile!"

Chief: "Hoss-style, dog-style, wolf-style, any-style, fuck-em
all."

Ms. W: "Oh, dear!"

Chief: "No deer. Bum too high, run too fast."
..

RTR - I know for a fact that Ms Arbins "Ass is Grass" when we *re-set
their clock* at JH. (Along the way, we hone our skills on MSU & LSU!) -
RollTideRoll... On to Hawaii with a clean sweep..

Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-10-31 Thread TIDE1

Barbra Walters was doing a documentary on the customs of American
Indians. 

After a tour of a reservation they were on, she was curious as to the
number of feathers in the headdresses.

She asked a brave who had only one feather in his headdress.  His
reply was, "one feather, one
 squaw."

She asked another brave, feeling the first fellow was only joking. 
This brave had four feathers in his headdress.  He  replied, 
"Four feathers,
 four squaws."

Still not convinced the number of feathers indicated the  number
of squaws involved, she decided to interview the Chief.  Now the
Chief had a headdress full of feathers which, needless to say, amused
Ms. Walters.

Ms. W:  "Why do you have so many feathers in your headdress?"

Chief:  "Me Chief,  fuck-em all, big, small, fat, tall, fuck-em
all."

Ms. W:  "You ought to be hung!"

Chief:  "Damned right, me hung.  Big like buffalo, long like snake."

Ms. W:  "You don't have to be so hostile!"

Chief:  "Hoss-style, dog-style, wolf-style, any-style,  fuck-em
all."

Ms. W:  "Oh, dear!"

Chief:  "No deer.  Bum too high, run too fast."
..

RTR - I know for a fact that Ms Arbins "Ass is Grass" when we *re-set
their clock* at JH. (Along the way, we hone our skills on MSU & LSU!) -
RollTideRoll... On to Hawaii with a clean sweep..

Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner (Non)

2003-10-23 Thread TIDE1

A woman was at the checkout counter at the Supermarket and she noticed
that the guy bagging her groceries was quite a "hunk" She wanted to
make a "move" but was pressed for time. He loaded the groceries in the
cart and as they walked toward the parking lot she decided to cut to the
chase and said - I have an *Itchy-Pussy*  He replied, Lady, these
"Foreign Cars" all look alike to me - just point it out when we get to
it !!!

Roll-MightyTide-Roll  BAMA 24 - utk 20

Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/Halloween


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RE: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-10-20 Thread Devan Orange
ROTFLMBO!!!
Great Joke VO!

-Original Message-
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED]
Behalf Of [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Sent: Friday, October 17, 2003 12:04 PM
To: [EMAIL PROTECTED]
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)



"The Manager Please"

A very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a
> > > quiet rural pub. She gestures
> > > alluringly to the bartender, who comes over
> > > immediately. When he arrives,
> > > she seductively signals that he should bring his
> > > face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins
> > to gently caress his full beard.
> > > "Are you the manager?
> > >
> > > she asks, softly stroking his face with both
> > > hands. "Actually, no," the man replies. "Can you get
> > > him for me? I need to speak to him," she says,
> > running her hands beyond his beard and into his
> > > hair.
> > > "I'm afraid I can't," breathed the bartender. "Is
> > > there anything I can do?"
> > >
> > > "Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message,"
> > > she continues, slyly
> > > popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and
> > > allowing him to suck them gently.
> > > What should I tell him?" the bartender manages to
> > > say.
> > > "Tell him," she whispers, "there isn't any toilet
> > > paper or hand soap in
> > > the ladies room!!

RollTideRoll - BAMA 27 - OleMiss 20... And that's the way it is!! 
 

Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/Halloween


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-10-17 Thread TIDE1

"The Manager Please"

A very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a
> > > quiet rural pub. She gestures
> > > alluringly to the bartender, who comes over
> > > immediately. When he arrives,
> > > she seductively signals that he should bring his
> > > face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins
> > to gently caress his full beard.
> > > "Are you the manager?
> > >
> > > she asks, softly stroking his face with both
> > > hands. "Actually, no," the man replies. "Can you get
> > > him for me? I need to speak to him," she says,
> > running her hands beyond his beard and into his
> > > hair.
> > > "I'm afraid I can't," breathed the bartender. "Is
> > > there anything I can do?"
> > >
> > > "Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message,"
> > > she continues, slyly
> > > popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and
> > > allowing him to suck them gently.
> > > What should I tell him?" the bartender manages to
> > > say.
> > > "Tell him," she whispers, "there isn't any toilet
> > > paper or hand soap in
> > > the ladies room!!

RollTideRoll - BAMA 27 - OleMiss 20... And that's the way it is!! 
 

Cheers -VO-
http://community.webtv.net/TIDE1/Halloween


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-10-10 Thread Joe Goodson
ROTFLMAO!
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
- Thomas Alva Edison (1847-1931)
- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, October 10, 2003 9:23 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)


>
> Subject: Military Retirement Bonus
>
> The pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an
> early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired
> immediately, his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch
> measured in a straight line between any two points on the general's
> body, with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished.
>
> The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the pension man
> to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet.
> He walked out with a check of $720,000.
>
> The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of
> his up-stretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a
> check for $960,000.
>
> When the third general, a grizzled old Marine General, was asked where
> to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my penis to my
> testicles."
>
> The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to
> reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had
> received.
>
> The Marine general insisted and the pension expert said that would be
> fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the
> measuring.
>
> The medical officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did.
>
> The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis
> and began to work back. "My God!" he said, "where are your testicles?"
> "Vietnam," the general replied !!
>
> Cheers -VO-
> <http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/>
>
>
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-10-10 Thread TIDE1

Subject: Military Retirement Bonus 

The pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an
early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired 
immediately, his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch
measured in a straight line between any two points on the general's 
body, with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished. 

The first man, an Air Force general, accepted. He asked the pension man
to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet. 
He walked out with a check of $720,000. 

The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of
his up-stretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a
check for $960,000. 

When the third general, a grizzled old Marine General, was asked where
to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my penis to my
testicles." 

The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to
reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had
received. 

The Marine general insisted and the pension expert said that would be
fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the 
measuring. 

The medical officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did. 

The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis
and began to work back. "My God!" he said, "where are your testicles?" 
"Vietnam," the general replied !! 

Cheers -VO-



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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner (non)

2003-10-03 Thread Pat Smoot
I BELIEVE, VO !!  We're gonna make them look like puppies !!


- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, October 03, 2003 9:26 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner (non)


> Sorry bout that. "Please believe" - "BAMA WILL BEAT" the jaw-ga
> dogs!
>
> Cheers -VO-
> <http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/>
>
>
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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner (non)

2003-10-03 Thread Steven Johnson
Be careful VO, Vicki will come out of the woodwork
after you.  :-)

RTR
LC
--- [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> 
> Harry, who thinks he's a *ladies man* went into a
> nightclub and saw a
> gorgeous honey sitting by herself at the bar, so he
> asked her to dance. 
> 
> She agreed and they took to the dance floor for a
> slow one. While they
> were cheek to cheek, Harry said, "You really smell
> terrific. What's that
> you have on?" 
> 
> The flattered girl told him it was Channel #5. 
> Then wanting to return the compliment, she said,
> "You smell good, too.
> What is it that you have on?" 
> 
> Honest Harry replied: "Well, I've got a hard on, but
> I didn't think you
> could smell it."
> 
> 
> Sorry bout that. "Please believe" - "BAMA WILL
> BEAT" the jaw-ga
> dogs!  
> 
> Cheers -VO-
> 
> 
> 
>
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[RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner (non)

2003-10-03 Thread TIDE1

Harry, who thinks he's a *ladies man* went into a nightclub and saw a
gorgeous honey sitting by herself at the bar, so he asked her to dance. 

She agreed and they took to the dance floor for a slow one. While they
were cheek to cheek, Harry said, "You really smell terrific. What's that
you have on?" 

The flattered girl told him it was Channel #5. 
Then wanting to return the compliment, she said, "You smell good, too.
What is it that you have on?" 

Honest Harry replied: "Well, I've got a hard on, but I didn't think you
could smell it."


Sorry bout that. "Please believe" - "BAMA WILL BEAT" the jaw-ga
dogs!  

Cheers -VO-



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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-09-26 Thread Steven Johnson
Hehehe.

RTR
LC
--- [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> 
> "Redneck Business"
> 
> Bubba was fixing a door and he found that he needed
> a new hinge, so he
> sent his wife Mary Louise to the hardware store.
>   
> At the hardware store Mary Louise saw a beautiful
> teapot on a top shelf
> manager, to finish waiting on a customer.   
> 
> When Joe Bob was finished, Mary Louise asked how
> much for the teapot.
> 
> Joe Bob replied, "That's silver and it costs $100!"
> 
> "My goodness, that sure is a lotta money!" Mary
> Louise exclaimed.  
> Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Bubba
> had sent her to  
> buy, and Jo Bob went to the backroom to find it.
> >From the backroom Joe Bob yelled, "Mary Louise, you
> wanna screw for that
> hinge?'
> 
> To which Mary Louise replied, "No, but I will for
> the teapot."
> 
> Cheers -VO-
> 
> 
> 
>
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-09-26 Thread TIDE1

"Redneck Business"

Bubba was fixing a door and he found that he needed a new hinge, so he
sent his wife Mary Louise to the hardware store.
  
At the hardware store Mary Louise saw a beautiful teapot on a top shelf
manager, to finish waiting on a customer.   

When Joe Bob was finished, Mary Louise asked how much for the teapot.

Joe Bob replied, "That's silver and it costs $100!"

"My goodness, that sure is a lotta money!" Mary Louise exclaimed.  
Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Bubba had sent her to  
buy, and Jo Bob went to the backroom to find it.
>From the backroom Joe Bob yelled, "Mary Louise, you wanna screw for that
hinge?'

To which Mary Louise replied, "No, but I will for the teapot."

Cheers -VO-



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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-09-19 Thread Joe Goodson
loved it!  LOL
"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with
sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."
- Galileo Galilei
- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, September 19, 2003 6:32 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)



A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman
perched on a bar stool.

He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there good looking, how's it
going?"

She turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says,

"Listen, I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place,
it
doesn't matter. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college. I
just
flat out love it."

He says, "No kidding?, I'm a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"


Cheers -VO-
<http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/>


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-09-19 Thread Jeff Todd
That was a goodie! Right, ScR?

Slef E.

- Original Message - 
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Friday, September 19, 2003 6:32 AM
Subject: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)



A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman
perched on a bar stool. 

He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there good looking, how's it
going?"

She turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says,

"Listen, I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place,
it
doesn't matter. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college. I
just
flat out love it."

He says, "No kidding?, I'm a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"
 

Cheers -VO-
<http://community-2.webtv.net/TIDE1/TIDE1VOGRAM/>


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner - (Non)

2003-09-19 Thread TIDE1

A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman
perched on a bar stool.

He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there good looking, how's it
going?"

She turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says,

"Listen,  I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place,
it
doesn't matter.  I've been doing it ever since I got out of college. I
just
flat out love it."

He says, "No kidding?, I'm a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"


Cheers -VO-



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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-09-12 Thread Steven Johnson
LMAO VO.

RTR
LC
--- [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> 
> Twin sisters in St.Luke's Nursing Home were turning
> one hundred years
> old. 
> The editor of the local newspaper told a
> photographer to get over there 
> and take pictures of the two 100-year-old twins. One
> of the twins was
> hard of hearing and the other could hear quite well.
> 
> Once the photographer arrived he asked the sisters
> to sit on the sofa.
> The 
> deaf sister said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" "WE
> GOTTA SIT OVER
> THERE ON THE SOFA!", said the other. "Now get a
> little closer together,"
> said the cameraman. Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" 
> "HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE!." So they
> wiggled up close to
> each other. 
> "Just hold on for a bit longer, I've got to focus a
> little," said the
> photographer. 
> Yet again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"
> "HE SAYS HE'S GONNA FOCUS!" 
> With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH 
> MY GOD - BOTH OF US?"
> 
> ***
> 
>   
> 
> Cheers -VO-
> 
> 
> 
>
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-09-12 Thread TIDE1

Twin sisters in St.Luke's Nursing Home were turning one hundred years
old. 
The editor of the local newspaper told a photographer to get over there 
and take pictures of the two 100-year-old twins. One of the twins was
hard of hearing and the other could hear quite well. 
Once the photographer arrived he asked the sisters to sit on the sofa.
The 
deaf sister said to her twin, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" "WE GOTTA SIT OVER
THERE ON THE SOFA!", said the other. "Now get a little closer together,"
said the cameraman. Again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?" 
"HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE!." So they wiggled up close to
each other. 
"Just hold on for a bit longer, I've got to focus a little," said the
photographer. 
Yet again, "WHAT DID HE SAY?"
"HE SAYS HE'S GONNA FOCUS!" 
With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, "OH 
MY GOD - BOTH OF US?"

***

  

Cheers -VO-



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[RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner (Non)

2003-09-05 Thread TIDE1

"RAGHEAD EMISSARY"

An Arab diplomat visiting the US for the first time was being wined and
dined by the State Department.  The Grand Emir was unused to the salt
in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies)
and was constantly sending his man-servant Abdul to fetch him a glass of
water.
 
Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of
water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed.
 
"Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water??"  demanded the
Grand Emir.
 
"A thousand pardons, Oh Illustrious One,"  stammered the wretched
Abdul, "white man sit on well."

**

Cheers -VO-



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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-08-29 Thread Steven Johnson
Priceless.  :-)

RTR
LC
--- [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> 
> Hey TIDE Fans - As you know, kickoff tomorrow will
> be the start of
> BAMA's climb back to the NC and I believe CMS will
> do just that.
> 
> SO - Let all of us start this season off with a *BIG
> DOSE* of "Inner
> Peace"
> 
> By following the simple advice I read in an article,
> I have finally
> found true 'Inner Peace'. 
> So can you - read on!
> 
> The article read: "The way to achieve 'Inner Peace'
> is to finish all the
> things you've started." 
> 
> I looked around to see all the things I started and
> hadn't
> finished...  WELL, today I have finished 1/2
> bottle of vodka, a
> bottle of red wine, 1/2 bottle of Jack Daniel's, my
> Prozac, a small box
> of chocolates and a six-pack of Heinekin. 
> 
> You have no idea how good I feel.. !!
> 
> Cheers -VO-
> 
> 
> 
>
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-08-29 Thread TIDE1

Hey TIDE Fans - As you know, kickoff tomorrow will be the start of
BAMA's climb back to the NC and I believe CMS will do just that.

SO - Let all of us start this season off with a *BIG DOSE* of "Inner
Peace"

By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally
found true 'Inner Peace'. 
So can you - read on!

The article read: "The way to achieve 'Inner Peace' is to finish all the
things you've started." 

I looked around to see all the things I started and hadn't
finished...  WELL, today I have finished 1/2 bottle of vodka, a
bottle of red wine, 1/2 bottle of Jack Daniel's, my Prozac, a small box
of chocolates and a six-pack of Heinekin. 

You have no idea how good I feel.. !!

Cheers -VO-



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[RollTideFan] TGIF - Groaner!! (Non)

2003-08-14 Thread TIDE1

 "Poor Baby - Down and Out" 
>
A young lady in the maternity ward just prior to labor was asked by the
midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. "I'm
afraid I don't have a husband" she replied. "OK, do you have a
boyfriend?" asks the Midwife. "No, no boyfriend either." 
"Do you have a partner then?" 
"No, I'm unattached, I'll be having my baby on my own." 
>
After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman. You have a
healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see her that
the baby is "black"!! 
>
"Well, replies the girl. I was very down on my luck, with no money and
nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in a Porno movie. The lead man
was black." 
>
"Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife, "that's really none of my
business and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions
but I must also tell you that the baby has blonde hair." 
>
"Well yes," the girl again replies, "you see I desperately needed the
money and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie, what
else could I do?" 
>
"Oh, I'm very sorry," the midwife repeats, "that's really none of my
business and I hate to pry further but your baby has slanted eyes." 
>
"Well yes," continues the girl, "I was incredibly hard up and there was
a little Chinese man also in the movie, I really had no choice." 
>
At this the midwife again apologises collects the baby and presents her
to the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the bum. 
>
The baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Thank God for that!"
"What do you mean?" says the midwife, shocked. "Well," says the girl
extremely relieved, "I had this horrible feeling that she was going to
bark."
.

Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-08-08 Thread TIDE1

 WHY ARE SOME HAIRS WHITE?
   
   One day, a little girl is sitting and watching her mother do the
   dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly notices that her mother
has
   several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to her
   brunette hair. She looks
   at her mother and inquisitively asks, "Why are some of your hairs
   white, Mom?"
   Her mother replied, "Well, every time that a little girl does
   something wrong and makes her mommy cry or makes her unhappy, one
of
   her hairs turns white."
   
    The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and
said:
    "You must have really pissed off Grandma!"
.

Hey y'all - Only 3 more "Groaners" before "BAMA KICKOFF"..

I can't wait. RTR - Cheers -VO-


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-08-01 Thread Steven Johnson
I like vodka and Milk of Magnesia, it is called a
Phillips Screwdriver.

RTR
LC
--- [EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
> 
> "Drink Special"
> 
> A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks
> "Bartender, got any specials today?" Bartender says,
> "Yes, as a matter
> of fact, we have a new
> drink invented by a gynecologist patron of ours. 
> It's a mixture of Pabst Blue Ribbon and Smirnoff
> Vodka." The guy asks,
> "Geeze, what the heck is that?" The Bartender says,
> "Well, we call it a
> 'Pabst Smir'" !!!
> 
> ..
> 
> And now for your "TGIF Groaner Boner"... er... ah...
> I mean "Groaner
> Bonus"...
> 
> ...
> 
> "HISTORY"
> 
> Have you ever wondered where the phrase "You gotta
> be shittin' me" came
> from? 
> 
> Well, it just so happens to have originated through
> the Father of our
> Country. 
> 
> Way back, George Washington was crossing the
> Delaware River with his
> troops. There were 33 in Washington's boat. It was
> extremely dark and
> storming furiously and the water was tossing them
> about. 
> 
> Finally, Washington grabbed Corporal Peters and
> stationed him at the
> front of the boat with a lantern. He ordered him to
> keep swinging it so
> they could see where they were heading. 
> 
> Corporal Peters, through the driving rain and cold,
> continued swinging
> the lantern back and forth, back and forth. Then a
> big gust of wind and
> wave hit and threw Corporal Peters and his lantern
> into the Delaware. 
> 
> Washington and his troops searched for nearly an
> hour trying to find
> Corporal Peters, but to no avail. All of them felt
> terrible, for the
> corporal had been one of their favorites. 
> 
> Sometime later, Washington and his troops landed on
> the other side, wet
> and totally exhausted. He rallied the troops and
> told them they must go
> on. 
> 
> About an hour later, one of his men said, "General,
> I see lights ahead!"
> They trudged towards the lights and came upon a huge
> house. What they
> didn't know was that this was a house of ill repute
> hidden in the forest
> to serve all who came. 
> 
> General Washington pounded on the door, his men
> crowding around him. The
> door swung open, and much to his surprise stood a
> beautiful woman. A
> huge smile came across her face to see so many men
> standing there. 
> 
> Washington was the first to speak, "Madam, I'm
> General George Washington
> and these are my men. We're tired, wet, exhausted
> and desperately need
> warmth and comfort." 
> 
> Again, the Madam looked at all the men standing
> there, and with a broad
> smile on her face, said, "Well, General, you have
> come to the right
> place. We can surely give you warmth and comfort.
> How many men do you
> have?" 
> 
> Washington replied, "Well, madam, there are 32 of us
> without Peters." 
> 
> And the Madam said, "You gotta be shittin me!"
> 
> ...
> 
> I'm not sorry - If "BAMA FOOTBALL" was played year
> around, you wouldn't
> have to put up with this BS!!I can't
> wait 
> 
> rtr - rtR - rTR - RTR - "ROLL TIDE ROLL"   
> 
> Cheers -VO-
> 
> 
>
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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner (Non)

2003-07-31 Thread TIDE1

"Drink Special"

A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks
"Bartender, got any specials today?" Bartender says, "Yes, as a matter
of fact, we have a new
drink invented by a gynecologist patron of ours. 
It's a mixture of Pabst Blue Ribbon and Smirnoff Vodka." The guy asks,
"Geeze, what the heck is that?" The Bartender says, "Well, we call it a
'Pabst Smir'" !!!

..

And now for your "TGIF Groaner Boner"... er... ah... I mean "Groaner
Bonus"...

...

"HISTORY"

Have you ever wondered where the phrase "You gotta be shittin' me" came
from? 

Well, it just so happens to have originated through the Father of our
Country. 

Way back, George Washington was crossing the Delaware River with his
troops. There were 33 in Washington's boat. It was extremely dark and
storming furiously and the water was tossing them about. 

Finally, Washington grabbed Corporal Peters and stationed him at the
front of the boat with a lantern. He ordered him to keep swinging it so
they could see where they were heading. 

Corporal Peters, through the driving rain and cold, continued swinging
the lantern back and forth, back and forth. Then a big gust of wind and
wave hit and threw Corporal Peters and his lantern into the Delaware. 

Washington and his troops searched for nearly an hour trying to find
Corporal Peters, but to no avail. All of them felt terrible, for the
corporal had been one of their favorites. 

Sometime later, Washington and his troops landed on the other side, wet
and totally exhausted. He rallied the troops and told them they must go
on. 

About an hour later, one of his men said, "General, I see lights ahead!"
They trudged towards the lights and came upon a huge house. What they
didn't know was that this was a house of ill repute hidden in the forest
to serve all who came. 

General Washington pounded on the door, his men crowding around him. The
door swung open, and much to his surprise stood a beautiful woman. A
huge smile came across her face to see so many men standing there. 

Washington was the first to speak, "Madam, I'm General George Washington
and these are my men. We're tired, wet, exhausted and desperately need
warmth and comfort." 

Again, the Madam looked at all the men standing there, and with a broad
smile on her face, said, "Well, General, you have come to the right
place. We can surely give you warmth and comfort. How many men do you
have?" 

Washington replied, "Well, madam, there are 32 of us without Peters." 

And the Madam said, "You gotta be shittin me!"

...

I'm not sorry - If "BAMA FOOTBALL" was played year around, you wouldn't
have to put up with this BS!!I can't wait 

rtr - rtR - rTR - RTR - "ROLL TIDE ROLL"   

Cheers -VO-


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF "Groaner" (Non)

2003-07-24 Thread Ricky McMahan
Here's another...

Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on gurneys next to each
other, outside the operating room.
The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"

The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a
little nervous."
The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that
done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they
give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze."
The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"

The first kid says, "A circumcision."

And the second kid says, "Whoa, Good luck, buddy, I had that done when
I was born...Couldn't walk for a year."
Rick

[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
A guy starts a new job, and the boss says, "If you marry my daughter,
I'll make you a partner, give you an expense account, a Mercedes, and a
million dollar annual salary."
 
The guy says, "What's wrong with her?" The boss shows him a picture, and
she's hideous.
 
The boss says, "It's only fair to tell you, she's not only ugly, she's
as dumb as a wall."
 
The guy accepts, figuring he can put a bag over her head when they have
sex. About a year later, the guy buys an original Van Gogh and he's
about to hang it on the wall. He climbs a ladder and yells to his wife,
"Bring me a hammer."
 
She mumbles, "Get the hammer. Get the hammer," and she fetches the
hammer. The guy says, "Get me some nails." She mumbles, "Get the nails.
Get the nails," and she gets him some nails.
 
The guys starts hammering a nail into the wall, he hits his thumb and
yells, "Fuck!"
 
She mumbles, "Get the bag. Get the bag."

Mercy  Cheers -VO-

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--
Yea, Alabama! Drown'em Tide!


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[RollTideFan] TGIF "Groaner" (Non)

2003-07-24 Thread TIDE1

A guy starts a new job, and the boss says, "If you marry my daughter,
I'll make you a partner, give you an expense account, a Mercedes, and a
million dollar annual salary."
 
The guy says, "What's wrong with her?" The boss shows him a picture, and
she's hideous.
 
The boss says, "It's only fair to tell you, she's not only ugly, she's
as dumb as a wall."
 
The guy accepts, figuring he can put a bag over her head when they have
sex. About a year later, the guy buys an original Van Gogh and he's
about to hang it on the wall. He climbs a ladder and yells to his wife,
"Bring me a hammer."
 
She mumbles, "Get the hammer. Get the hammer," and she fetches the
hammer. The guy says, "Get me some nails." She mumbles, "Get the nails.
Get the nails," and she gets him some nails.
 
The guys starts hammering a nail into the wall, he hits his thumb and
yells, "Fuck!"
 
She mumbles, "Get the bag. Get the bag."

Mercy  Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner! (Non)

2003-07-17 Thread TIDE1

An eighteen-year-old girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period
for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys
a pregnancy kit. 
>
The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. 
Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did
this to you? I want to know!" 
>
The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a
Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature and distinguished man
with gray hair & impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out
of it and enters the house. 
>
He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and
tells them: 
>
"Good evening, your daughter has informed me of the problem. However, I
can't marry her because of my personal family situation, but I will
provide the following support. 
>
If a girl is born, I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a
beachfront villa and a $1,000,000 bank account. 
>
If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a
$2,000,000 bank account. If it is twins, a factory and $2,000,000 each. 
>
However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?" 
>
At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly
on the man's shoulder and tells him, "You'll fuck her again!" 
>
I'm outta here. Cheers -VO-


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Re: [RollTideFan] "TGIF Groaner" (Non)

2003-07-10 Thread Jeff Todd
BBBWWHHHAAA!

Good one, VO!

Right, HuGe?

Slef E.

- Original Message -
From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Cc: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]>
Sent: Thursday, July 10, 2003 11:47 PM
Subject: [RollTideFan] "TGIF Groaner" (Non)



"Sweet Little Nancy"
>
Little Nancy was in the garden filling up a large hole in the ground,
when her neighbor peered over the fence.
>
Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely
asked, "What are you
doing there, Nancy?"
>
"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully without looking up, "and
I've just buried him."
>
The neighbor was very concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a
goldfish, isn't it?"
>
Nancy patted down the last heap of dirt and then replied, "That's
because he's inside your fucking cat."

Cheers -VO-


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[RollTideFan] "TGIF Groaner" (Non)

2003-07-10 Thread TIDE1

"Sweet Little Nancy"
>
Little Nancy was in the garden filling up a large hole in the ground,
when her neighbor peered over the fence. 
>
Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely
asked, "What are you
doing there, Nancy?"
>
"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully without looking up, "and
I've just buried him."
>
The neighbor was very concerned.  "That's an awfully big hole for a
goldfish, isn't it?"
>
Nancy patted down the last heap of dirt and then replied, "That's
because he's inside your fucking cat."

Cheers -VO-


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Re: [RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner!! (NON)

2003-07-04 Thread Ricky Mc.
Right back at-cha VO. Everyone enjoy the cookouts and fireworks, but 
most of all give thanks for our INDEPENDENCE!! Drag out a copy of 
Springsteen's "Born in the USA" and crank that baby up!

Roll Tide!
Rick
--
Yea, Alabama! Drown 'em Tide!
[EMAIL PROTECTED] wrote:
Have a great Holiday Weekend my friends, but most of all  "God Bless
and Stay Safe"
Cheers -VO-







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[RollTideFan] TGIF Groaner!! (NON)

2003-07-03 Thread TIDE1

NO Groaner Today! - It's Friday, the 4th of July!

The following link is by far the *finest tribute* to "Independence Day"
that I have seen on the Internet in several years. Hopefully, you will
enjoy it as much as I did. (Don't forget the Audio)

Have a great Holiday Weekend my friends, but most of all  "God Bless
and Stay Safe"

Cheers -VO-



http://www.grace24u.org/july4th.html