Team, I am associated with another organisation called SHIFT (stands for Service and Help In Free Time). The name was given so because all the members are busy working lot and the desire to do something good for the society brought us together and we wanted to do all the activities in our free time. For us, social service was important, but second in priority to our work by which we earn our bread. We felt, if we work, we will be able to help others. And if we don't, then we will be seeking help from others. But slowly members migrated to different parts of the globe and we could not generate more members. It resulted in less fund in-flow and less work/project also. At this point, I got to know Prasanthi, joined TMAD. If knowing Prasanthi/subscribing to TMAD yahoo group is a criterion for being a member, I am one of the old members of TMAD. I thought I can do something here. But my work load and pressure increased and free time decreased. I could not do nothing. Still I was considering myself as a member, did whatever small help I could. The developments in the last 2 months, however, are forcing me to rethink about my presence here. What is happening in the group? In one mail, we are opposing to online polling. "Oh No, no more polls..". On the other hand, we are sending mails seeking opinions with predefined opinions. Like in cometitive exam, we get MCQ(Multiple Choice Questions) to reply from. Either one will opt for one reply or will not reply at all. Don't we think this is another poll? I read the MoM and the arguments against that.Many questions have been raised on what should have been the agenda or should be the format of agenda. For the last meeting, the agenda was published very much in time. There was enough time to rectify & republish the agenda. We did not do that. Now that MoM has been published, we wish to say what should have been, what should not. There were members present in that meeting. When we discussed something and decided(if thats what we few want to call it), few of the members maintained silence. If someone does not respond to a mail, we consider either (i) he is not reading the mails regularly or missed this particular mail to which some response is colicited, (ii) he is agreeing to whatever has been dicsussed, hence he is silent and not increasing the mail count or (iii) he is confused to say anything and feels it safe to travel in the same boat with the majority. But in person, when we meet, we discuss something and someone remains silent, is it because we few scare them so much that they do not open their mouth? I feel few members do not talk because they see their opinion is already in discussion and probably they are in concurrence with the decision of the majority. And if for any other reason they did/do not speak, is it the problem of the majority? It is a large group and there would be various ways of thinking/doing a particular thing. I do not agree to agree with the way you work, does not mean others are not agreeing. If agreeing people are more in number, decision has to be taken. While concluding the meeting, I requested all the 3 to cross-check the MoM before making it public. This could possibly have been done in the back drop. But looks we wanted to make it public and we did it. We discussed and decided whatever we felt right at that moment. If someone had to disagree (from the absentee), s/he has every right to do so and probably that can be done in a more cordial manner.But members who were present, they could have discussed these things at personal level. Prasanthi did not like because many members told (in the meeting) and expressed through mails that SATISFACTION is the main reason for joining the group. Probably the members got a single word to express why they joined and what they did not explain is, they get satisfaction either directly by helping someone by working in the field or indirectly by sending money to be spent on the needy or atleast by sharing their ideas on the possible ways to help people. And I am very sure, none of those members meant GETTING SATISFACTION by becoming a member of the mailing group, just to read 10 super lengthy mails a day and some backlashes to few of those mails. Serving people/society with passion is not necessarily giving one day for meeting/field work. Someone may have greater passion, but his core activities are not allowing him even that one day. In that case, he shows his passion by funding different projects. We cannot say his passions are lesser than of the passion level of the people who can actually work in the field. Its a symbiosis that fetches the result, the objective of helping others. Few give money, few give time, few give ideas and few give all of the above. Level of passion varies from person to person. All cannot be evaluated on the same scale. Someone was giving Rs.1000 as monthly membership fee but later changed (or decided to) give Rs.100 only, someone gave few thousands at a time for any project are again subjective. I have other commitments on social front also. I do fund other cases every month. No one asked me why I will be giving only Rs.100 or no one ever asked me to pay more. It depends on my comfort level. Why so much of explanation for that? Why we kept Rs.100 as monthly membership fee is, we considered that Rs.100 is very much okay for almost all the members and people who give more, will be termed as donors (apart from being members) and people who cannot give even this amount, would be considered as volunteers because they can actually give time and help executing projects. But in a group, when it comes to registration/membership, all the members are on the same scale. A single set of rule applies to all the members. Hence uniform membership fee for all. Why such a lengthy explanation for cutting down on the financial help? A point to ponder that we are not going to make any difference with small amount. What amount is maximum/optimum for making a difference in one's life? A kidney patient needs Rs.3 lakh to get operated. You generate the amount and pay to him. He would be fit and would be able to work. But his earnings may not be sufficient to buy his monthly medicines. What to be done in that case? Till what extent he can be helped financially? What would be a real difference to him? And unless he buys his medicines regulalry, his transplannted kidney also would fail and he eventually would die. What difference we can make there? And we are talking about making differences in lives by Rs.100 or Rs.1000. Effective meetings: Starting a meeting in time and concluding in time, are also equally important for an effective meeting. Like I know not more than 3 persons are going to read the whole content of my mail, in the same way we know that if a meeting is dragged for long on a particular issue, then interested members also lose interest and leave. The usage of superlatives MOST & OF ALL are again subjective. It depends on the person who use them. Is that a matter to be debated? Few days back, a new member wrote his 1st mail and mentioned that he could smell some coldwar going on between members. Probably he was right. Now I feel there is a strong urge going on within members to prove who is great in usage of vocabulary, who has done most for the group, whose thinking is most logical and we keep arguing, debating for unwanted issues. With this kind of attitude, I strongly feel we are going nowhere and I also feel that as I cannot keep quiet at the way mails are being written/argued and that my replies would further damage the situation, it is in the interest of the group that I withdraw myself. With immediate effect, I withdraw myself as a member of TMAD. If anytime while working for SHIFT, I need any help, I would contact TMAD group as the Secretary of SHIFT and not as a TMAD member. I am really hurt and feeling suffocated about the way mails are being written. Ratan P.S. Please forgive me for writing such a lengthy mail.
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