"Unemployment is continually rising, foreclosures are through the roof. I saw a
bumper sticker the other day that said, 'If this van's a-rockin', it's because
we live here now.'"
- Bill Maher
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Last week, in a White House meeting with Democratic and Republican leaders in
Congress, the president and everyone else at the table renewed their commitment
to work together and help Americans overcome the very real challenges before
them. ..."
- Rep. John Boehner [R-OH], House Minority Leader
.. and yet, yesterday, every House Republican voted against President Obama's
budget.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Not Fully Diversified
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=fbdc924507760fd09b0ce8e726e41776
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Americans are becoming more optimistic about the nation's economy, a new
survey showed Wednesday. This explains why Fox News didn't carry the Obama news
conference. No need to alarm Republicans."
- Joe Hickman
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
President Obama had a press conference on the anniversary of his 100th day in
office, and he took questions from ABC, CBS, CNN, and NBC -- but not FOX News,
which had decided not to air the press conference.
FOX correspondent Greta Van Susteren then asked, on air, "How is it decided who
gets questions? ... FOX News did not get a question tonight."
Here is a partial list of the correct answers to her question:
- You guys were next on the list, but (ahem) we just ran out of time.
- 100 Days of "Fair & Balanced" should explain it....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35eRxxZ-Ar0
- FOX's identity as a "news organization" was questioned, as evidenced by their
decision not to broadcast President Obama's news conference on their main
network.
- It was a "Press Conference". FOX will be notified if Obama ever has a
"Ministry of Propaganda Conference".
- FOX is French for "dumbass".... Who would'a known?!
- "FOX News" (hah! if there really is such a thing!) literally sponsored the
teabagging parties as a stunt to attack President Obama; and then, in the
aftermath, they cheered on talk of states seceding from the Union.
- Because it's hard to hear the answer with teabags stuck in your ears.
- Somebody tipped the WH off as to what FOX's question was going to be: "Mr.
Hussein, after meeting with far left wing dictators from Venezuela and al-Qaeda
fundraisers from Saudi Arabia, have you decided whether your government will
lean socialist or extremist? Or will you stick with fascism?"
- Sorry, Barack's just not that into you....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
FOX BREAKING NEWS
President Obama gave his third primetime news conference Wednesday evening, and
you didn't see it here!
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
If you don't play the game, you don't make the rules....
[NOTE: there were no questions from the Cartoon Network either]
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
GOP Set To Launch Rebranding Effort
http://tinyurl.com/dcsden
Coming soon to a battleground state near you: a new effort to revive the image
of the Republican Party and to counter President Obama's characterization of
Republicans as "the party of 'no.'"
CNN has learned that the new initiative, called the National Council for a New
America, will be announced Thursday.
It will involve an outreach by an interesting mix of GOP officials, ranging
from 2008 Republican presidential nominee John McCain to Jeb Bush, the former
Florida governor and the younger brother of the man many Republicans blame for
the party's battered brand: former President George W. Bush ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"You know things are really humming along when your 'rebranding' effort is led
by your recently crushed presidential nominee and your discredited party
leader's brother."
- Josh Marshall, talkingpointsmemo.com
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Balderdash!
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=bce027cd48493c8a85dc4c2e92dabfe7
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"I tell you, the economy is so bad, third graders in China are being forced to
get second jobs."
- Jay Leno
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Bring It!
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=30f088311acbe593d120705c5ff5d339
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"We were led to believe that we would see great change, immediate change, and
all we're seeing is a prolonged effort, because just what happened in the 1930s
with FDR:
"The more the government spent, the more the government regulated, the more the
government put up tariff barriers -- trade barriers -- the more government
intervened, the longer the recession occurred. And as a matter of fact, the
recession that FDR had to deal with wasn't as bad as the recession Coolidge had
to deal with in the early '20s. Yet, the prescription that Coolidge put on
that, from history, is lower taxes, lower regulatory burden, and we saw the
roaring '20s where we saw markets and growth in the economy like we'd never
seen before in the history of the country.
"FDR applied just the opposite formula -- the Hoot-Smalley Act, which was a
tremendous burden on tariff restrictions, and then, of course, trade barriers
and the regulatory burden and tax barriers. That's what we saw happen under
FDR. That took a recession and blew it into a full-scale depression. The
American people suffered for almost 10 years under that kind of thinking."
- Sen. Michele Bachmann [R-MN]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLmy6cjU2Vk
Wow, I'm not sure I even know where to begin, Sen. McDumbatroid....
1. a) The depression began in 1929 and b) Unemployment was already around 25%
when FDR took office in 1933.
2. "the Hoot-Smalley Act" .... you don't by any chance mean the Smoot-Hawley
Tariff Act, do you?
3. The Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act .... named after Sen. Reed Smoot [R-UT] and Rep.
Willis Hawley [R-OR] .... was signed into law in June of 1930 by President
Herbert Hoover [R], a few years before FDR took office (March 4, 1933).
4. Please.... you are welcome to bring up this progression of increasing
favoritism to the richest (Coolidge, the roaring 20s), followed by a major
stock market crash ('29), with the follow-up total economic collapse (under
H.Hoover) as often as you want.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Michele Bachmann.... sounds like somebody already f...@#ked her brains out.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The First 100 Days
http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/M/h/2/first-100-days-no.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"[Obama is] telling us that it's going to get worse. He does tell us it's going
to get worse before it gets better but when it gets better it's going to be
utopia. But no, he's not being inspirational at all. He's helping to spread
this kind of fear and chaos. And his administration is predicting 10%
unemployment before it gets better, 10% unemployment by the end of the year.
But you can't grade him an F. I was asked this last night on the panel in
Beverly Hills that I appeared. I gave him a D, because you gotta allow room for
more failure. If you give him an F now, you're saying it can't get any worse,
and believe me, it can, and it will. So you gotta leave room for failure here."
- Rush Limbaugh
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
If only "Those People" weren't here....
The Black-White Divide In Obama's Popularity
http://tinyurl.com/cyrxjx
On his 100th day in office, Barack Obama enjoys high job approval ratings, no
matter what poll you consult. But if a new survey by the New York Times is
accurate, the president and some of his policies are significantly less popular
with white Americans than with black Americans, and his sky-high ratings among
African-Americans make some of his positions appear a bit more popular overall
than they actually are. ....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Whatever, Dude....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=302b964d371cc8a4739f504ab5356313
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Crime is down in New York City. Tomorrow criminals head down to Washington to
request a bailout."
- David Letterman
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Workers Walk the Plank
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/28/opinion/28herbert.html
I'm sure everyone is thrilled to know that the high rollers on Wall Street are
bouncing back. With profits on the rebound, the big shots at the biggest
institutions are on track, as The Times reported Sunday, to make as much money
this year as they were hauling in before the mega-recession began.
The growing legions of the unemployed can be forgiven for not shouting
hallelujah. It's a little like watching the drunken driver who plowed into your
family car and caused untold havoc and heartache, suddenly pulling up one
morning, no worse for the wear, in a sparkling new vehicle.
The folks who led the nation to this financial abyss are the ones being made
whole on the taxpayers' dime. We can look after them, all right. But we can't
seem to get credit flowing in any normal way again; we can't stanch the
terrible flow of home foreclosures; and we're not doing nearly enough to
address the most critical need of all: putting people back to work.
While Wall Street is breaking out the Champagne yet again, the rest of the
economy is beyond terrible, and will be for the foreseeable future. ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The Other One....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=c6c06ef34c8dca9f3f6249d1859013d5
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"General Motors told President Obama yesterday that they need to cut another
21,000 jobs. Since GM only has 15,000 employees left, they've asked for
permission to fire 6,000 employees at Ford."
- Frank King
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Chrysler files for Chapter 11
http://www.bizjournals.com/losangeles/stories/2009/04/27/daily31.html
Chrysler is being given a second chance of at life.
President Barack Obama said Thursday that the nation's third-largest automaker
is filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.
"This is not a sign of weakness but one more step on a clearly chartered path
to survival," Obama said during a noon news conference.
As part of the deal, the federal government will provide $3.5 billion for
bankruptcy financing and an additional $4.7 billion in exit financing. In
addition, Chrysler will enter a deal with Italy's Fiat in which Fiat agreed to
transfer billions of dollars in cutting-edge technology to Chrysler.
"As part of their agreement, every dime of new taxpayer money will be repaid
before Fiat can take a majority ownership stake in Chrysler," Obama said. ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"With GM and Chrysler teetering near bankruptcy, Ford's business is seeing a
pick up in revenues... mostly because the automaker is now selling cars and
antidepressants."
- Jake Novak
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
What Do I Worry About?
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=88f253729d537380957bcf1397813b95
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
TIME FOR CHENEY TO GO HUNTING
http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/04/28/cafferty.cheney/index.html
It's time for the Republican Party to tell former Vice President Dick Cheney to
put a sock in it.
Here we are 100 days into the new administration of Barack Obama, and Darth
Vader is still wandering around grumbling about why the new administration is
all wrong.
Nobody is interested anymore, Mr. Vice President. You and your gaggle of
miscreants had your shot, and we are in the toilet because of it. Don't you get
it?
The election of this nation's first African-American president and his massacre
of John McCain in the Electoral College is because of you and President Bush
and the myriad problems you left us all with. ...
Now our reputation is shot, we are bankrupt, we continue to fight two wars that
you started and the economy is in the worst recession since the Great
Depression. And you have the temerity to go around criticizing those who
replaced you? How dare you?
If the Republican Party has any hopes of redeeming itself in the eyes of the
voters, they must distance themselves from the likes of Dick Cheney and the
fundamentalist right-wingers who have become the poster children of political
intolerance in this country.
Why do you think some members of your party are suggesting you embrace same-sex
marriage? Because of a change of heart? I doubt it. More likely, the wiser
heads in the party recognize that without some nod toward inclusion of someone
besides the extremists you represent, your party's political chances going
forward hover between slim and none.
Please, go quail hunting and leave the rest of us alone.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Who Am I?
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=e4c1bfc4577802de87457c1f817e5992
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Larry Summers, President Obama's chief economic adviser, fell asleep on
Thursday during a White House meeting with credit card industry officials..
Even when these guys TALK to the White House, it's in boring fine print."
- Jerry Perisho
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
You Gotta Problem Wid Dat?
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=aae56133f4cd61ae04a3bfc84cb7581d
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Congress Working On Credit Card Reform
http://www.theonion.com/content/infograph/congress_working_on_credit
The House Financial Services Committee has approved a "Credit Cardholders' Bill
of Rights" designed to control the detrimental habits of credit card companies.
Here are some of the reforms suggested:
- Companies must offer more badass card designs, such as a Sherman tank or the
Motörhead insignia
- When you've gone over your limit, someone from the credit card company will
come hang out at your place to prevent you from going out
- Agents can no longer use the phrase "it's like free money" when describing
their product.
- Card issuers not allowed to even imply that the "platinum" designation holds
any sort of prestige
- Lenders should make it clearer from the outset that they actually want their
money repaid
- All things will be made less appealing to buy
- Credit cards must feature a picture of your parents looking disapproving on
them
- Zero percent interest on stuff bought while obviously drunk
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
1stQ Performance
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=ca484309c4ebb231ded7fef3a16f276f
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Citigroup is asking the Treasury for permission to pay special bonuses to many
key employees... like the guy who makes out all the pink slips every month."
- Jake Novak
*****************
Presto Change-O!!
http://cagle.com/working/090428/matson.jpg
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