"GOP Chairman Michael Steele spoke to the NRA convention in Phoenix Friday and
warned that Obama wants to take away their guns. He was preaching to the choir.
Arizona is so pro-gun that the Phoenix Theater's production of Peter Pan
features a shootout at the end."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Los Angeles will start water rationing in June, which means Dick Cheney will
only be allowed to waterboard guys two days a week now."
- Jay Leno
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The Reverend Mr. Rumsfeld
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=d51d9e578a5298dfb72e83dfcdb6bfd0
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Another Stunning Republican Success
http://washingtonindependent.com/43572/another-stunning-republican-success
. . By nearly a 2 to 1 margin, Americans say that President Obama is doing
better, not worse, than his predecessor, George W. Bush, when it comes to
national security. ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
America is so safe under President Obama that "Dick" Cheney finally came out
from his undisclosed hiding place....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"I'm speechless, which is more than I can say for Dick Cheney. Dick Cheney will
not shut the f...@#k up. He's all over. He's on Fox News, he's on 'Face the
Nation,' he's on every radio show. Today, he was on 'Oprah' complaining John
Edwards cheated on him. He's everywhere. Remember the good ol' days when the
guy who got tortured did the talking?"
- Bill Maher
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Let Me Fix That For You....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=9cc926e9a73608b892c99518ddfda2a8
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Don't Forget The Mockery
http://www.talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/2009/05/dont_forget_the_mockeryphp
.. for those who want to remain among the lucid, let's not forget who the
former vice president is.
This is someone who not only organized and seemingly directed a policy of
state-sponsored torture. He did it in large part to get people to admit to
crankish conspiracy theories he got taken in by, by a crew of think-tank
jockeys in DC whose theories most even half-way sensible people treated as
punch lines of jokes. So it's Torquemada or 1984 but only after getting
rescripted by Mel Brooks.
This is an extremely gullible man who has just come off being the driving
ideological force in an administration that most people can already see
produced more fiascos and titanic, self-inflicted goofs than possibly any in
our entire history. By any standard the guy is a monumental failure -- and not
one whose mistakes stem in some Lyndon Johnson fashion from tragic overreach,
but just a fool who damaged his country through his own gullibility, paranoia
and bad judgment. Whatever else you can say about the Cheney story it ain't
Shakespearean.
So as we see the big reporters trying to put him on some sort of equal footing
with President Obama today, let's remember that the great majority of Americans
see Dick Cheney, accurately, as a clown. And mockery isn't just the most
effective but also the most morally apt response to the man.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
I'm waiting for Republicans to attempt to ban the word "freedom"....
But then, what would we call our fries?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"I try to be cynical, but it's so hard to keep up."
- Lily Tomlin
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Hang On There....
http://www.cagle.com/working/090422/hachfeld.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Both President Obama and Dick Cheney will give competing speeches tomorrow on
national security and terrorism. It's kind of like "American Idol" except one
of them got voted off months ago."
- Jimmy Fallon
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Okay, Okay!
http://www.cagle.com/working/090515/stein.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Wishful thinking, I know, but the phone call go something like this:
"Good morning, CNN News."
"Hi. I'm calling from Vice President Cheney's office and the Vice President
would like to speak on-air with Wolf Blitzer."
"Who did you say you're representing?"
"Vice President Richard Cheney."
"I'm sorry but he's not the Vice President; Joe Biden is. Cheney is retired."
"Excuse me? Even if he's retired he is still referred to as -- "
"Anyway, like you said, he's retired and his opinions about things aren't news
and Wolf has more important things to do. See if you can get Cheney on The
View."
"You don't realize who you're talking to! What's your name?"
"Thank you for calling CNN. Goodbye." click.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"For all the partisan anger that still lingers, our administration will stand
up well in history, not despite our actions after 9/11, but because of them.
... After the most lethal and devastating terrorist attack ever,
seven-and-a-half years without a repeat is not a record to be rebuked and
scorned..."
- "Dick" Cheney, former U.S. V.P.
Really? So, 25 or 30 years from now, people are going to remember you guys as
"the administration that kept us safe for 7 out of their 8 years in office"?
Which is the more significant event, "Dick": the worst terrorist attack ever on
U.S. soil, or 7 years WITHOUT a terrorist attack on U.S. soil?
The envelope, please....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Where's It Going To End?"
http://www.dailykostv.com/w/001367/
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
I wonder how many times the lifeguard had to tell little Dick Cheney to stop
pissing in the pool....
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Saying Bush/Cheney have kept us safe since 9/11 is like praising O.J. Simpson
for being murder-free since 1994. Mostly true, but..."
- Greg Saunders, thetalentshow.org
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Is It True?
http://www.bartcop.com/kid-curious.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Cheney's Speech Contained Omissions And Misstatements
http://www.freep.com/article/20090522/NEWS15/90521105
Former Vice President Dick Cheney's defense Thursday of the Bush
administration's policies for interrogating suspected terrorists contained
omissions, exaggerations and misstatements. ...
- Cheney said the Bush administration "moved decisively against the terrorists
in their hideouts and their sanctuaries, and committed to using every asset to
take down their networks."
The former vice president didn't point out that Osama bin Laden and his chief
lieutenant, Ayman al Zawahri, remain at large nearly eight years after 9/11 and
that the Bush administration began diverting U.S. forces, intelligence assets,
time and money to planning an invasion of Iraq before it finished the war in
Afghanistan against Al Qaeda and the Taliban. ...
- Cheney denied there was any connection between the Bush administration's
interrogation policies and the abuse of detainees at Iraq's Abu Ghraib prison,
which he blamed on "a few sadistic guards ... in violation of American law,
military regulations and simple decency."
However, a bipartisan Senate Armed Services Committee report in December traced
the abuses at Abu Ghraib to the approval of the techniques by senior Bush
administration officials, including former Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld.
"The abuse of detainees in U.S. custody cannot simply be attributed to the
actions of 'a few bad apples' acting on their own," said the report issued by
Sens. Carl Levin, D-Mich., and John McCain, R-Ariz. "The fact is that senior
officials in the United States government solicited information on how to use
aggressive techniques, redefined the law to create the appearance of their
legality and authorized their use against detainees." ..
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
I think it's time for a restraining order....
America's Psycho Hose Beast Strikes Again
http://tinyurl.com/p2umx9
Yesterday morning, Richard "Euphemism For Penis" Cheney showed up at the
American Enterprise Institute to give a speech to explain in detail - but
without bitterness, jealousy, or any sense of rejection - why your new, ugly,
stupid girlfriend sucks so f...@#king hard. ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Dick's Flag
http://editorialcartoonists.com/cartoons/BenneC/2009/BenneC20090517_low.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"[Cheney] believes that waterboarding doesn't fall under the Geneva Conventions
and that it's not a form of torture. But you know, it goes back to the Spanish
Inquisition."
- Sen. John McCain [R-AZ] http://tinyurl.com/pco9vj
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The Real Path to Security
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/22/opinion/22fri1.html
. . For seven years, President George W. Bush tried to frighten the American
public -- and successfully cowed Congress -- with bullying and disinformation.
On Thursday, President Obama told the truth. It was a moment of political
courage that will make this country safer. ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
The Terrorist Next Door
http://washingtonindependent.com/43777/the-terrorist-next-door
The headline of a just-released Senate Republican Policy Committee document on
what to do with Guantanamo Bay detainees:
Meet Your New Neighbor, Khalid Sheikh Mohammad?
There's actually nothing in the 15-page paper suggesting that Khalid Sheikh
Mohammad could be released into American society. There is, however, an
exposition of the problem of the 17 Uighur detainees who were cleared of enemy
combatant status by the Bush administration, and who could be resettled in
Virginia. So, by the transitive property: KSM could be walking out to pick up
his morning paper while you're mowing your lawn.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Inescapable!!!
http://cagle.com/working/090518/bors.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"President Obama has found a way to quickly close Guantanamo Bay. He's going to
turn it into a Pontiac dealership."
- Jay Leno
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid Holds News Conference
http://www.cqpolitics.com/wmspage.cfm?parm1=5&docID=news-000003120881
Sen. Harry Reid: Democrats under no circumstances will move forward without a
comprehensive, responsible plan from the president. We will never allow
terrorists to be released into the United States.
QUESTION: If the United States -- if the United States thinks that these people
should be held, why shouldn't they be held in the United States? Why shouldn't
the U.S. take those risks, the attendant risk of holding them, since it's the
one that says they should be held?
Sen. Harry Reid: I think there's a general feeling, as I've already said, that
the American people, and certainly the Senate, overwhelmingly doesn't want
terrorists to be released in the United States. And I think we're going to
stick with that.
QUESTION: What about imprisoned in the United States?
Sen. Harry Reid: . . . I'm saying that the United States Senate, Democrats and
Republicans, do not want terrorists to be released in the United States. That's
very clear.
QUESTION: No one's talking about releasing them. We're talking about putting
them in prison somewhere in the United States.
Sen. Harry Reid: Can't put them in prison unless you release them.
QUESTION: Sir, are you going to clarify that a little bit? ...
REID: I can't -- I can't -- I can't make it any more clear than the statement I
have given to you. We will never allow terrorists to be released in the United
States. I think the majority -- I speak for the majority of the Senate.
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
National Security....
http://www.credoaction.com/comics/2009/05/national_security_why_are_repu.html
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
You know, I realize that a lot of Republican politicians have gone to jail in
the past few years, and even a few Democrats, but trying to scare the crap out
of people by equating super-max prisons with our neighborhoods is still a bit
of a stretch.... no?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
So I Asked Myself....
http://thehill.com/images/stories/weyants/2009/May/cartoon052209.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Can't put them in prison unless you release them."
- Sen. Harry Reid [D-NV]
It's a little-known fact that Harry Reid co-wrote the classic Abbot & Costello
routine, "Who's on First."
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Some Things Never Change, Do They?
http://www.salon.com/comics/tomo/2007/06/04/tomo/index.html
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself? Well then, let's be really
fearful!"
- Anonymous Senate Majority Leader
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Ha Ha, Suckers!
http://cagle.com/working/090521/luckovich.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
GOP Lawmakers: Life is Good At Guantanamo Bay
http://blogs.abcnews.com/thenote/2009/05/gop-lawmakers-l.html
ABC News' Jennifer Parker reports: Movies, books, newspapers, Sudoku puzzles
and high-quality health care. These are just some of the privileges detainees
at Guantanamo Bay are receiving, according to recent claims by some Republican
lawmakers.
At a news conference on Capitol Hill Wednesday, Sen. James Inhofe, R-Okla,
argued the 240 detainees being held at a U.S. military detention center in
Guantanamo Bay are being treated well.
"Anyone, any detainee over 55 has an opportunity to have a colonoscopy," Inhofe
told reporters, "Now none of them take 'em up on it because once they explain
what it is none of them want to do it. But nonetheless it's an opportunity that
they have." ...
[he's just jealous.... a 55-year old Republican probably has to pay for anal]
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Ode To Tropical Breeze Colonoscopies
By Madeleine Begun Kane, madkane.com
I'm moving to Gitmo real soon
Cuz I'm told inmate health care's a boon.
Colonoscopies free
After fifty-five. Whee!
So please lock me up, Sen. Buffoon!
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Colonoscopy.... is that what the kids are calling it nowadays?
https://www.plumbersstock.com/images/products/large/00295904.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"CIA Director Leon Panetta said Friday that nobody misled Nancy Pelosi about
waterboarding. It's starting to wear on her. She gets her hair done every
morning on the way to work and today it took three people to get her to put her
head in the shampoo bowl."
- Argus Hamilton
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Torture. That is the story that just will not go away in this country, and now
with Nancy Pelosi in the middle of it. Yes, Republicans keep changing their
story on torture. First it was, 'We didn't torture.' Then it was, 'Okay we
tortured, but it worked.' And now it's, 'Nancy Pelosi said we could! She said
it was okay!'"
- Bill Maher
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Downright Un-American!!!
http://thehill.com/images/stories/weyants/2009/May/cartoon051909.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
I keep reading this phrase about throwing political figures "under the bus,"
and I'm just curious about how, hypothetically speaking, one would go about
landing the job of driving the bus in question....?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"Lying to the Congress of the United States is a crime. And if the speaker is
accusing the CIA and other intelligence officials of lying or misleading the
Congress, then she should come forward with evidence and turn that over to the
Justice Department so they can be prosecuted. And if that's not the case, I
think she ought to apologize to our intelligence professionals around the
world."
- Rep. John Boehner [R-OH], House Minority Leader
"They would never lie to Congress, because they would be crushed."
- Sen. Kit Bond [R-MO]
"She made some outrageous accusations last week where she said that the CIA
lied to her and lied systematically over a period of years. That is a very,
very serious charge. Either the CIA needs to be held accountable for their
performance during this time or the speaker needs to be held accountable and be
responsible for the actions and the statements that she made last week. One or
the other is correct, one or the other is wrong."
- Rep. Pete Hoekstra [R-MI]
Gee, the CIA would never do anything like that, would they?!?
C.I.A. Withheld Data in Peru Plane Crash Inquiry
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/21/world/americas/21inquire.html
An internal investigation by the Central Intelligence Agency has found that the
agency withheld crucial information from federal investigators who spent years
trying to determine whether C.I.A. officers committed crimes related to the
accidental downing of a missionary plane in Peru in 2001.
The August 2008 report by John L. Helgerson, the C.I.A.'s inspector general,
could lead the Justice Department to reopen its investigation into the
shooting, examining in particular whether senior C.I.A. officers obstructed
justice or lied to Congress by burying details about the episode and the
C.I.A.'s broader counternarcotics program. ...
In releasing unclassified parts of the report on Thursday, Representative Peter
J. Hoekstra of Michigan, the top Republican on the House Intelligence
Committee, said he was asking the Justice Department to consider whether the
C.I.A.'s actions after the incident amounted to obstruction of justice. "This
is about as ugly as it gets," said Mr. Hoekstra, who added that the Justice
Department had closed its investigation based on a review of "incomplete
information." ...
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
It's All Nancy's Fault!
http://www.allhatnocattle.net/elephants-gop-2009.jpg
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"I think she has lied to the House, and I think that the House has an absolute
obligation to open an inquiry, and I hope there will be a resolution to
investigate her. And I think this is a big deal. I don't think the Speaker of
the House can lie to the country on national security matters."
- Newt Gingrich [R], Former Speaker Of The House
"Nancy Pelosi has disqualified herself as Speaker by throwing a tantrum on Air
Force One, shutting down the government, providing inaccurate information in an
ethics investigation, and obsessing about Whitewater. Oh, wait, that was me..."
- Newt the Grinch
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Hell....
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=9344987423cef6b3a12f901be0fe40c1
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Nancy Pelosi should resign because she knew about the program that Dick Cheney
should get a Medal of Freedom for....
Is that really what you're saying, Republicans?!?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
You Lied! Admit It!!
http://imgsrv.gocomics.com/dim/?fh=9ba24e0a9b27bf0dca646a427257a5c3
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"We are not in a position to vouch for the accuracy of the document. We can
tell you that in the particular entry stating that Senator Rockefeller was
briefed on February 4th of 2003 with an asterisk also noting him as later
individually briefed -- that is not correct, or at least is not being reported
correctly by people reading the document. The Democratic staff director
attended a briefing on Feb. 4, but Senator Rockefeller was not present and was
not later briefed individually by anyone in the intelligence community. He was
first personally briefed by the intelligence community on Sept 4th, 2003."
- Office of Sen. Jay Rockefeller [D-WV]
"I do not have any recollection of being briefed on waterboarding or other
forms of extraordinary interrogation techniques, or Abu Zubaydah being
subjected to them... Something as unexpected and dramatic as that would be the
kind of thing that you would normally expect to recall even years later."
- Former Sen. Bob Graham [D-FL]
(at the time) Chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee
Dear Director Panetta:
In light of current controversy about CIA briefing practices, I was surprised
to learn that the agency erroneously listed an appropriations staffer as being
in a key briefing on September 19, 2006, when in fact he was not. The list the
agency released entitled "Member Briefings on Enhanced Interrogation Techniques
(EITs)", shows that House Appropriations Committee defense appropriations
staffer Paul Juola was in that briefing on that date. In fact, Mr. Juola
recollects that he walked members to the briefing room, met General Hayden and
Mr.Walker, who were the briefers, and was told that he could not attend the
briefing. We request that you immediately correct this record.
Sincerely,
Rep. David Obey [D-WI]
Chairman, House Appropriations Committee
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Also strange.... all the CIA's current documents listing these meetings and
briefings call them "Enhanced Interrogation Techniques":
Member Briefings on Enhanced Interrogation Techniques
http://tinyurl.com/r82skb
But that term was never in use until June of 2004, when they decided to SUSPEND
their actual use....
http://www.usatoday.com/news/world/iraq/2004-06-27-cia-interrogations_x.htm
...but not way back in 2002 when the briefings supposedly began. So if they
really DID brief congress's intelligence comm. members.... what were they
calling their methods back then... hmmmm?
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
"The CIA has a very bad record when it comes to -- I was about to say candid,
that's too mild -- to honesty."
- Sen. Arlen Specter [D-PA]
Former [R] Chairman, Senate Intelligence Committee
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
Change The Subject!
http://cagle.com/working/090519/lane.gif
=--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--= =--=
BREAKING NEWS from PNN.news.com
-- After repeated waterboarding, Rep. Pelosi admits CIA telling truth.
(via TopFive.com)
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