Hi Kristy, I said "voluntarily" satisfy, not be a sex slave.... In other words if a man is loved and his desires satisfied by a woman who loves him, he doesn't have the need to become a rapist.
I think the hidden message here is that men aren't born rapists, they rape out of unsatisfied desires. If those desires are satisfied they would never become a rapist. But even a 'normal' man, under enough duress and unsatisfied desire may become a rapist given a situation in which he thinks he can get away with it. Edgar On Feb 23, 2011, at 9:26 PM, Kristy McClain wrote: > Edgar, > > I agree fully with your 2nd and 3rd paragraphs, but I disagree with part of > what you say in the first, when you suggest that the cure for a rapist, is > to have a willing partner to satisfy and indulge his sexual appetite and > fantasiey, whenever he desires it. While i acknowledge that rape is indeed > motivated in part, by sexual urges, it is not the complete picture. I don't > know if you followed the earlier thread wherein I discussed D/s and voluntary > sexual submission /slavery? > > Having a sexual servant who provides fulfillment for every fantasy, no matter > how dark or violent, does not seem to impact the rape stats, or the cases for > SVU units. So there is more to this. This area is not my range of study or > experience, but clearly, there are other factors. > > Thanks, > > Kristy > > > --- On Wed, 2/23/11, Edgar Owen <[email protected]> wrote: > > From: Edgar Owen <[email protected]> > Subject: Re: [Zen] Re: Can A Buddha Harm Others? > To: [email protected] > Date: Wednesday, February 23, 2011, 1:56 PM > > > Kristy, > > Good objective comments. Rape fantasies are indeed common among women, though > of course these are invariably about really appealing lusty guys who won't > take no for an answer rather than men that the woman isn't attracted to as > may well be the case in actual rapes. The cure for rape is of course for the > potential rapist to have a woman who satisfies all his desires voluntarily. > If this is the case he has no need to go elsewhere on any terms. > Unfortunately few women know how to provide this to a man. It's not just > about providing ordinary sex, but fulfilling his deepest psychological needs > as a man as well. > > Throughout history rape has been quite common and everyone of us is almost > certainly the descendant of one or more rapes in their ancestry. From an > evolutionary perspective rape is quite natural and is an excellent strategy > to maximize one's genetic legacy - if one can get away with it. As ED's > article points out this is usually only the case in when the woman in > question is not under the protection of male family members as is usually the > case in traditional societies. In modern western societies the state has > usurped male protection of women which makes them more vulnerable to rape. > > Men were given a very strong natural desire to have sex with attractive women > at almost any cost if they can manage it. The genes that give that impetus > have been strengthened because such men tend to leave more descendants > carrying those genes. Every man has at least some desire to rape women he > can't get otherwise though that desire is usually tempered by an equally > strong survival instinct. Men of course have strong rape fantasies as well. > These often take the form of the woman he rapes realizing how wonderful he is > and falling head over heels in love with him because he is such a great lover > whether he actually is or not! > > Edgar > > > > On Feb 23, 2011, at 1:22 PM, Kristy McClain wrote: > >> >> Edgar is indeed correct. It can be "comforting" to believe that the >> incentive is power--hatred of women and the like. But the evidence, and >> the report from rapists themselves, is that it is indeed about sex. Though >> other factors co-exist. >> >> 10 years ago, i was moderating a rape-fantasy discussion board, as part of a >> training exercise. A clinical psychologist in NY was running a group for >> male sex offenders who were in prison. We had many discussions on this, and >> the consenses was in agreement with this article. The psychologist running >> the group was--himself drawn to the act of rape as a sexual drive. He >> told me that the best gift his wife gave him was the acceptance she offered >> him when he confessed this to her. She even offered to role-play a rape >> scene with him, but he refused. He told me that he felt it might get out >> of hand. >> >> Its easy to label these men as monsters as a means to deny their right to >> even exist. Brand them. Shun them. But they do exist, and have since the >> dawn of man. If we are all "one", we can only hope to heal if everyone is >> included in the process. >> >> I may hate child abusers.. but I remember that more often than not, they >> were abused too. >> >> btw.. There are many, many females who have rape fantasies, as part of >> their erotic responses. >> >> Remember.. I recognize this is a polarizing topic. I'm not denying the >> experience rape has on unwilling females. I'm just offering another >> perspective because the only way to ever hope to prevent or heal the >> problem, is to look at it with a clear mirror. >> >> Edgar, >> >> What does the data show on rape when it is done in countries as part of >> geneocide? >> >> Kristy >> >> >> --- On Wed, 2/23/11, Edgar Owen <[email protected]> wrote: >> >> From: Edgar Owen <[email protected]> >> Subject: Re: [Zen] Re: Can A Buddha Harm Others? >> To: [email protected] >> Date: Wednesday, February 23, 2011, 8:08 AM >> >> >> Rape is primarily about satisfying sexual desire when it can't be achieved >> otherwise. Complete power over a woman can be a very strong aphrodisiac. >> Especially where violence or injury is involved it can also be combined with >> the man's desire for revenge against women for perceived psychological >> injury previously suffered at the hands of a woman or women in general by >> the rapist. >> >> Edgar >> >> >> On Feb 23, 2011, at 9:45 AM, ED wrote: >> >>> >>> >>> >>> Hi Audrey - >>> Yours is an assertion that conforms to the usual feminist position. It may >>> be true or it may not. Has the truth of the assertion been confirmed by say >>> neurophysiologists and neuropsychologists? >>> Thanks, ED >>> >>> --- In [email protected], "audreydc1983" <audreydc1983@...> wrote: >>> > >>> > I will beg to differ on one point: Rape has little to do with sexual >>> > desire. It is about power, control, and victimization. >>> > Those of us who believe sex is a natural product of lust, sexual desire, >>> > and love often will assume that rape, since it is a sexual act, is >>> > associated in some way with these feelings. >>> > This assumption couldn't be further from the truth. If there is any >>> > desire in rape, it is the desire to control/victimize. >>> > >>> > ~Audrey >>> >> >> > > >
