The paradox about our grandparents is that we never knew them before they were our grandparents. Many of us have been dissapointed in adulthood to learn that the beloved grandparent we experienced was, after all, made of clay, and may not have been a very good parent or spouse. My theory is as follows: God expects us to be tough staff sargeants to our children to make sure they turn out OK. The reward for being tough when we would have preferred to be " friends" to our children, is that we get to spoil our grandchildren. I am always reminded of an episode with my mother. One Saturday, my young daughter and I went to visit my mother as we did every Saturday. At about 11 AM my daughter asked her grandmother if she had any ice cream. "Of course, querida, let me get you a big bowl." "No you won't" said I, "it is almost lunch time." "Please Dad!" said my daughter. "Oh come on!", said my mother. "I am her father", said I, "and I said no. Would you have let me have a bowl of ice cream just before lunch time?" "Dad, why can't you be more like vavó?" My response: "You should have known her when she was my mother!" May she rest in peace. John Miranda Raposo
________________________________ From: Mike <[email protected]> To: [email protected] Sent: Monday, September 10, 2012 5:59 PM Subject: [AZORES-Genealogy] Re: Writing the family history I agree, what isn't common knowledge to the family and is only learned by you through hearsay I'd leave out. Nobody wants to learn that someone in their family was like that, especially since they will never have known the man.... On Monday, September 10, 2012 2:36:16 PM UTC-4, Leonard Silva wrote: I have been researching my grandfather in the hopes of writing a history for the coming generations and to satisfy the curiosity of my family about their heritage. > >After some research, I find that the kindly old man that I knew as a child may >not have been all that nice. Stories are starting to arise of abuse, >excessive drinking, and estrangement of his children. > >My father was a product of his second marriage and cared a lot for his >parents. Vovoo was an old man of 75 when I was born, and I only knew a sweet, >kind old man who loved me. Now, I am finding that the children of his first >marriage did not hold him in such high esteem. > >So, my question for the group is: If you were putting together a family >history for the generations to come, how would you handle this? > >Most of the stories are hearsay as there is no one alive with direct >knowledge, but there must be something to them. > >I am inclined to be very honest in relating family stories, but I wonder how >some of you might handle this. > >Thanks for your input, > >Len > -- To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected]. Follow the confirmation directions when they arrive. For more options, such as changing to List, Digest, Abridged, or No Mail (vacation) mode, log into your Google account and visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/Azores. Click in the blue area on the right that says "Join this group" and it will take you to "Edit my membership." -- To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected]. Follow the confirmation directions when they arrive. For more options, such as changing to List, Digest, Abridged, or No Mail (vacation) mode, log into your Google account and visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/Azores. Click in the blue area on the right that says "Join this group" and it will take you to "Edit my membership."
