Hi Jess, We made a similar decision about my grandfather a few years ago. Every time we saw him for the first 18 months or so, which is every day usually, he would beg us to take him home. It was heartbreaking. It was worse than heartbreaking, really -- it felt like we betrayed him. But I would remind him why we made the decision that we did, the details of which I won't go into here, but will privately, and he would look at me really confused because he didn't remember what had happened. And then he would cry because he believed me. Let me tell you how much that sucks, to see a man you admired pretty much more than anything else in this world, crying and begging you to take him home.
Eventually he got to the point where he could see that he needed the kind of help we just couldn't give him at home (24 hour care, can't do the stairs, etc) and he stopped begging us to go home. When we did take him home for the holidays or whatever, he would eventually tell us he was ready to go back, usually before we were ready to take him. The last time we brought him home he only lasted a couple of hours and wanted to go back almost as soon as he got there. We stopped trying last year, I think. I guess the point of this is: 1) You're not alone. You're *SO* not alone. This decision sucks and it continues to suck for a long time, but if you look around at everything they do for your mom, you'll realize that you just can't do it all, and it was the right decision to make. It only helps a little, but accept it for what it is. 2) He adjusted, eventually. Your mom will, too. You can email me privately if you want. It helped me immensely in the beginning to be able to talk about it and to have people to talk about it with. I would be happy to help you with that if you need it. joe --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "BGG Down" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/BGG_down?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
