On Mon, 15 Jul 2002, Erik Reuter wrote:

> > And it's not clever spam, either.  I concur.
>
> I disagree. I think he should be able to post what he wants.

I admire your tolerance but regret to say I no longer share it.  I'm
sufficiently enamored of the "community" concept of Brin-L - as a goal if
not as a given - that I'm willing to break an egg or two to make that
omlette.

I don't like Jeroen very much.  His manners and tone have for years
suggested to me that he sees others not as people but as cogs in the
Brin-L machine.  If they adhere to his concept of the guidelines and if
they don't disagree too vehemently with his opinions, then the cogs are
functioning properly.  If someone objects to his beliefs or strays from
his concept of the rules, then the cog is broken and must be beaten back
into shape by whatever means necessary.  When personal difficulties arise
with another listmember the tactics of conciliation, self-explanation,
self-examination, and other-examination are all but unknown from him.
He's interested in whether he can win a cog over or whether he can defeat
an errant cog, but he's not interested in knowing the cogs well enough
to see them as people whom the rules (such as they are) are meant to serve
and not vice versa.

For instance: in this latest tiff between you, Erik, and Jeroen, there is
an interesting contrast.  Even though you have childishly and tiresomely
baited him into a rage, you did so by paying attention to who he is and
how he thinks.  You actually had to look at him as a person before you
could taunt him as a fool.  In that there is a germ of respect.  His
response to you, however, is rule-based and mechanical.  It's compulsive,
inflexible, and not grounded in any attempt to react creatively to the
truth of what's happening.  That fact conveys more disregard than anything
he's actually written.

(Of course, he will disagree and say that he is defending his own rights
and the common good, but the fact that he's incapable of seeing that the
way to victory is by shutting up proves my point.)

None of these faults disqualify Jeroen from being a listmember, nor do I
want to seem him permanently expelled.  I like the fact that he
frequently tweaks American conceits, for instance, even when I disagree
with him.  But his character is ill suited to a listowner position in any
list where many members want it to function like a community in some way,
where the people as people are deemed more important than the management
of the thread-making machinery.

If one sees a mailing list as a source of interesting topics and little
else, then the total tolerance rule might work.  But it's at variance with
my interests as I perceive them, so I can't buy into it in this instance.

I have several interests of which I'm aware.  Like many, I want to see
Brin-L become a place of happy freewheeling discussion, the kind of place
where we can talk about an online community without feeling shamefully
naive for saying so.  I'm also very frustrated that Jeroen is so clueless
about people, about himself, and about how to function socially in this
kind of setting, and I'm angry that he makes no attempt to learn from the
people - including me but not just me - who have attempted to be
peacemakers in the past.  Although my habits tell me I should attempt
to play the peacemaker role again, my common sense tells me that when a
strategy fails multiple times, it's time to change the strategy.  If I'm
honest I'll also admit this:  I want to see Jeroen suffer at the hands of
irony.

And that's why I'm saying what I actually think, which probably shocks all
those I've told in the past to bite their tongues and take the high road.

I can think of one or two perspectives from which all I've just
written will seem like utter crap, but those are the risks.  Caveat
emptor, of course.

Marvin Long
Austin, Texas

There ain't no Devil; there's just God when he's drunk.
   -- Tom Waits



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