I said there is no reliable inventory for abusers. or at least one you
have put forward.

As for respect, well frankly my dear I don't give a rat's ass. You've
already shown what you are. and are appropriately killfiled.

On 4/18/05, Dana <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> Whereas I think we should be very careful before we decide that
> someone would be better off dead. Bottom line, is she better off dead
> or is it just better for *him*?
> 
> So when we are talking about a possibility like that and it is being
> dismissed as unimportant I find it a little difficult to be
> overconcerned about maligning somoene who runs around saying his
> wife's brain is a bag of water.
> 
> I don't have much respect for Larry's posts any more. You may have
> noticed that I didn't bother asking him for a citation for his
> assertion that there is no inventory for an abusive relationship,
> because there is no such citation -- I speak as one who has been
> through scholar.google.com pretty thoroughly -- and he won't bother to
> answer because he can't and he never admits it when he is wrong.
> 
> Look. There is a profile. Whether you choose to believe ot like it or
> not. The assertion that there isn't is simply laughable. If you want
> to see the numbers that go with it, read the studies I posted. If you
> don't want to, quit complaining that the profile doesn't tell you that
> there is a 51.25 percent chance that you are in an abusive
> relationship. As in most things, reality is slightly different and
> more complex. Some people have risk factors and overcome them. Some
> people get help. Some people engage in denial and go there ::shrug::
> 
> Let's focus on what is important, you and I. The only reason this even
> matters is that it goes to Michael Schiavo's credibilty as
> spokesperson for Terri. It is possible for him to be both abusive and
> truthful, sure. But a doubt would arise.
> 
> Now, some of saying that he fits the profile assumes that certain
> statements made by other people are accurate, sure.
> 
> But let me see if I can get it all in one post without forgetting
> anything. After that, if you would like to believe that there is no
> such thing as domestic abuse, that Michael Schiavo is a great guy and
> the Schindlers are neurotic fools, hey my friend, whatever floats your
> boat. I have only persisted this long because you have struck me up to
> this point as someone who gives osme thought to things.
> 
> OK.
> 
> a) What seems to be uncontested is that neither one of this couple had
> much education and that neither had a terribly exciting job. There
> were issues with money. All of this is typical of the background to
> abuse but does not prove it existed.
> 
> b) Where we start to fit a little more closely is that he chose a
> woman who was younger and overweight, who was shy and did not have a
> lot of self-confidence. She married the first guy she ever kissed. At
> 20. This proves nothing in and of itself but is somewhat suggestive in
> conjunction with a).
> 
> c) This man is prone to rages when things are not to his liking.
> Remember "nursing hime administrator's nightmare"?
> 
> d) His wife lost weight, became more attractive and more outspoken,
> and the marriage ran into difficulties. Could be coincidence but is
> very classic especially against a background of a and b.
> 
> e) She wound up in the hospital on the eve of leaving him. Does assume
> that the woman saying this was telling the truth, but is almost
> diagnostic if true. Men with power issues can't stand to be left.
> 
> From here down we assume that certain people are telling the truth.
> The fit with the profile depends on whether they are in fact telling
> the truth of course.
> 
> And there are things we will never know, such as whether he hit her,
> but there *are* those unexplained injuries, which a radiologist said
> in one of the links that I posted would be *required* to be reported
> if seen in a child. I have not seen a better explanation than his.
> 
> One of Terri's family -- I believe it was the sister -- said that
> Michael attacked her the night Terri went to the hospital.
> 
> According to the shrink who made the much-aligned original statement
> that he fit the profile, he used to check her odometer to make sure
> she wasn't going anywhere without his permission. Also very suggestive
> of advanced power issues.
> 
> According to Cindy Shook, an ex-girlfriend who may of course have her
> own agenda, he used to stalk her.
> 
> Also according to Cindy Shook, he was extremely jealous.
> 
> Cindy Shook also said she was terrified of him and she did not come
> forward until she was supoenaed because she was convinced he would
> hurt her child.
> 
> Cindy Shook investigated getting a restraining order.
> 
> Cindy Shook said said that Shiavo blames Terri for ruining his life
> and felt he was entitled to compensation (she was his girlfriend at
> the time of the malpractice trial). She also said that he told her
> they never discussed last wishes.
> 
> I don't remember the name of the nurse, but there were affidavits to
> the effect that Schiavo would call up and ask when the bitch was going
> to die.
> 
> I still see no good reason for not allowing the blinds to be opened.
> 
> There are concerns from this period that would amount to neglect if
> true, the wheelchair not being repaired, Terri not being allowed out
> of bed, infections, etc. I don't know if these are among the
> allegations that were dismissed as unfounded.
> 
> Using her money would also qualify as abuse.
> 
> Let's see, intimidatng, yes, a lot of people seem to decribe him that
> way and I think some of the staff used the word abusive in their
> affidavits; also, if true, he was very concerned about minor details
> of her daily regimen like making sure her hands weren't bandaged.
> 
> Let's see, withholding food water or medical treatment, trifecta there....
> 
> Abusing pets, hmm, he had her cats put to sleep...
> 
> Minimizing the abuse, saying the abuse never happened, ayup...shifting
> responsibility, yes, see above...
> 
> Preventing the spouse from seeing family, isolating, yes....
> 
> Mock you or humiliate you, depends on whether you count being compared
> to a table lamp....
> 
> :P
> 
> I'm done with this topic.
> 
> Dana
> 
> On 4/17/05, Gruss Gott <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote:
> > > Dana wrote:
> > > So. We are left with the fact that my opinion hasn't changed, and
> > > neither has yours :) I am glad that you don't have any stake in my
> >
> > I'm challenging you because you said, "he fits the profile."  Based on
> > your responses, what you meant was that he met your subjective opinion
> > and not a objective probabilistic profile.
> >
> > The problem I have with that is in saying "he fits the profile" you
> > imply that you have some expertise in such matters and are making an
> > objective statement rather than an opinion - that's a lie of omission;
> > maybe in your case it's due to exuberance, I dunno.
> >
> > If Larry's post if accurate, my suspicion is is right: there's a bunch
> > of people that can't understand someone who's fighting for another's
> > decision they wouldn't make so they try to make sense of it by
> > inventing things to fit their fantasy rather than accepting what they
> > see.
> >
> > The problem with that is that they're messing with someone's life and
> > I think we should be very careful before we go doing that.
> >
> >
> 
> 

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