> There are ranges that will rent usually.
> You should look around online. You're in
> Florida right?  That's a Class III state.
> You could probably even rent machine guns.

Woohoo! I can kill paper 30 times per second! :)

> Porn?  Lots of porn?

I was thinking about that email I got about an offshore impotence
treatment... :P

>>I'm lost.

> It was a reference to moshing/slam/pogo dancing.

Ahh... yeah, see, I've never been to those clubs.

> I actually meant snuggling with a loved one.
> The TV is just background noise.  I find being
> physically close, yet non-sexual can be a great
> release, and remind me of why I am out here
> busting my hump.

This is probably a character flaw, but unless I make some progress
(usually several hours) on my own programming projects nearly every
day, I feel very... "unproductive"... and I get agitated, and of
course, that doesn't help my depression because then I'm just thinking
about all the work I'm not doing and how all that work is not helping
me pay for my divorce... Tiff is frequently (always?) upset about the
amount of time I spend with her... my perception of it is -- we (she
and I both) aren't able to live the way we want to live, and so I'm
working toward a future in which we could potentially live the way we
want to live. To do that I have to produce some software that people
want to buy, and since I haven't in the 5 years (not significantly --
a few sales on the chat room at $40/per) that represents essentially
zero progress toward the goal of having our desired lifestyle. 5 years
is a long time for zero progress (and I didn't make any significant
progress in the 2 yrs of CF work prior to that when I was with my ex,
with the exception of job-history)... So my reasoning then of course
logically follows that I haven't worked hard enough, so I need to work
harder so that I don't waste the next 5, 10 or 20 yrs treading water
and continuing to produce zero progress toward our goals. The issue of
"cuddling" ends up often being a sore subject for Tiff.

> I understand the wage slave thing, ghod
> do I ever.  Have you thought of relocating?
> I know this area needs CF people bad, and
> the salaries are pretty good.  The environment
> can be really sucky, which is why I gave
> up so much money to come work at Teratech.

Man... the industry has been rough for me over the past 5 yrs... or 7
really... in the past 6-7 yrs I've worked for 5 companies that have or
very nearly have gone bankrupt / out of business or simply run out of
work. Some ASP service providers, some consulting companies... and I'm
not above admitting that I have made (political) mistakes at a few
jobs.

Short anser (too late I know): yes, I've thought about it

Longer answer: I'd consider it... although... struggling though I am,
right now I just passed my 1yr aniversary with sitemanageware, so
although I continue to keep my eyes open for job leads (because the
past 7 yrs have made me very paranoid) and I don't tell recruiters to
sod off when they call, I'm torn. I work with some really nice people
-- the code is frustrating (more because of it having been designed
originally by non-programmers), but that's been true of most of the
places I've worked... What's different about this job is that my
co-workers seem to care about me as a person, and I'm a significant
part of the R&D team (there are 3 of us) so while I don't have the
final say on architecture, my voice is significant in architecture
decisions. The only problem I have with the job is my salary -- and
the only reason I have a problem with my salary is that I'm ~$30k in
arrears child support accrued over the last 5 yrs, plus $1500/mo per
month... At the rate it's being paid off currently ($300/mo), assuming
there's a sudden radical change in the industry and/or my luck and I'm
able to keep this job, I'll have it paid off in a little over 8 yrs,
at which point I might be able to save some cash toward my own
life-goals... my life-begins! Woohoo! At age 38 <sigh>... So... yeah,
I've thought about it... and staying where I am sucks, and taking
another job sucks... so I'm not sure how to handle it... I've never
actively looked for another job when I've had a salaried job.

>>I didn't think so... Why? Do you grow on trees? :)

> So far I think I only grow on people.
> They are usually very anti-me upon
> first meeting me.  They come around
> though :)

:)

s. isaac dealey     954.522.6080
new epoch : isn't it time for a change?

add features without fixtures with
the onTap open source framework

http://www.fusiontap.com
http://coldfusion.sys-con.com/author/4806Dealey.htm


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