Ha! My wife prefers being hoisted in a bosun’s chair, even though she’s so-so 
on sailing.

That comes from many years of roller coasters and other thrill rides.

First time one of us had to go up, I offered her a choice.  Her reply was, “I’m 
not going to do all of the work while you sit in that chair telling me what to 
do. You crank me up the mast!”

Jack Brennan
Former C&C 25
Shanachie, 1974 Bristol 30
Tierra Verde, Fl.


From: Joel Aronson via CnC-List
Sent: Monday, September 22, 2014 1:53 PM
To: Indigo ; [email protected]
Subject: Re: Stus-List wife dosen't like it when the boat leans

Just don't ask her to go up the mast to retrieve a halyard!

Joel

On Mon, Sep 22, 2014 at 1:40 PM, Indigo via CnC-List <[email protected]> 
wrote:

  Some great advice!  My wife, a very reluctant sailor, sought advice years ago 
from Edwin Gaynor (RIP). She did not act on his advice - which was " go racing" 
until this year. Made all the difference - along with sailing with girl friends 
on the Ideal 18s.


  --
  Jonathan
  Indigo C&C 35III

  SOUTHPORT CT

  On Sep 22, 2014, at 13:26, Edd Schillay via CnC-List <[email protected]> 
wrote:


    All,

    I’ve been lucky as well, but I can offer up some good tips:

      1. If you race the boat, get her on to the racing team. I know this may 
create the Seinfeld-esqe paradox of “Worlds Colliding”, but her comfort level 
will increase drastically when she sees the boat heeling while under the 
control of you and your able crew. A lot of her discomfort is based on safety 
concerns, and when she’s out with you, she may think you are faking it by 
pretending to enjoy the heel. Seeing it happen regularly to the delight of you 
and others will go a long way.

      2. Give her the wheel from time to time. Let her feel the power and 
control. And don’t appear nervous - if she sees you enjoying the angle while 
she’s driving, she’ll come to enjoy it while you are.

      3. Get her a big, comfy chair. We have one of these on board: 
http://www.westmarine.com/buy/west-marine--high-back-go-anywhere-seat-navy-blue--10967917.
 Yes, it may interfere with getting to the winch handle. But when she’s 
comfortable on board, she’ll gladly move when you make adjustments. Plus, a 
comfy seat will cradle her and make her more comfortable. There’s a reason why 
they have bucket seats and not benches in sports cars.

      4. Let her add her personal touches on board. This past weekend, David 
Risch, possibly to protect his masculinity hard-core racing image, was very 
quick to point out that the frilly blue throw pillows in the cockpit were all 
Diane’s idea and not his. Now I know how much we all like our boats to look 
fabulous, but not, you know, FABULOUS, but, even still, just having them there, 
for her, will make the boat that much more inviting to her. Good move, David. 
And yes, the Enterprise has throw pillows on board too (but way more manly than 
the ones David has.)  :-)

      5. Attend a Rendezvous. She’ll talk with the other spouses because, 
frankly, she doesn’t want to hear the story that you’re telling the other guys 
about how you braved the latest storm or finished a race with a leaking bilge 
pump. And, surprisingly enough, you’ll find that they’re not talking about 
fashion, flowers, frilly things or how much men suck, but about their 
experiences on their boats — the exciting times, the scary times and how they 
felt when things went wrong. They won’t feel alone and they will enjoy it all, 
even the heeling, that much more.



    All the best,

    Edd


    Edd M. Schillay
    Starship Enterprise
    C&C 37+ | Sail No: NCC-1701-B
    City Island, NY
    Starship Enterprise's Captain's Log



    On Sep 22, 2014, at 12:39 PM, Gary Nylander via CnC-List 
<[email protected]> wrote:


      I've been lucky. My first admiral was gung-ho for almost anything 
thrilling, so sailing on the windows was not a problem. We used to take our 
Coronado 15 dinghy out into the ocean from Marina del Rey and up to Santa 
Monica and back - surfing down the side of waves on the way back. (she then 
co-drove the IMSA 911)....

      Second admiral was much the same way - another 911 person - now the 
co-owner of Penniless - and running second in the Wednesday night B fleet (has 
a first place trophy from a few years back).

      Current admiral was raised by a father with an old Alden 46 yawl. After 
many summers spent sanding and varnishing, he would take it out when the wind 
was over 15, so it would move. Now, she doesn't like it when the rail is not 
close to the waves.

      As I said, I'm lucky.

      Gary
        ----- Original Message -----
        From: Jean-Francois J Rivard via CnC-List
        To: [email protected]
        Sent: Monday, September 22, 2014 9:41 AM
        Subject: Stus-List wife dosen't like it when the boat leans

          I'm in the same boat (Pun intended)

          The kids dig it, every one except the dog and my wife loves to hang 
out on the rail when the wind pipes up.  No matter how much I tell my wife that 
the lake winds and little chop are not even close to being a challenge for a 
boat that was meant for offshore racing / cruising she just sits there worried..

          My biggest problem is that she does not participate much anymore.  
The few times she was grinding or doing something she kinda got into it.  We 
tried her at the helm many times, she does not have much of a feel for it  and 
typically looses focus which turns into luffing / half tacks..    When I try to 
talk her through it, she takes it as a personal dig on her sailing skills.  
Obviously,  she's a bit short on skills, she's have never sailed before.

          My next attempt is to get her to take lessons from the local guy at 
the marina.  (We're overdue for formal stuff) I meant to do it last year but 
much needed boat maintenance / updates drained the available funds.  I figure 
(Hope) she'll be more receptive to the instructor's advice and instructions.

          I think if we can get her busy on the boat, she'll enjoy it better.

          -Francois
          1990 34+ "Take Five"
          Lake Lanier, Georgia



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--
Joel
301 541 8551


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