Greetings,

I tend to agree with Ms Pringle's statement about the effectiveness of
counselling on wife abusers. I know of several cases here where such
people, once caught out, will willingly attend counselling just to show
the world that they are trying their best to change their behavior. It
sometimes becomes only a window dressing because once they are in their
homefront they begin to enforce their so called "power" and unquestionable
rights on their family members.

Many a time, the abused spouses tolerate it because of society's tolerance
for such male dominated behavior, family's lack of support for the abused
wife, the guilt feeling of being disloyal and betrayal if they were to
complain about their husbands to outsiders, the ostracisation that the
wives and their families may have to face if they were to take their
husbands to task. I think we will have to take culture and gender roles
into account when dealing with home violence because in certain cultures,
the males are the superior beings and as such call all the shots, whether
right or wrong. In fact, this is further reenforced by the way they are
nurtured from young. So, if they are unable to impose their will and
exercise their power in other settings, be it the office or elsewhere,
they take it out on the poor wife and the helpless kids. Therefore, I
think there is a need to change the mind sets and to empower women and
provide them with educational opportunities so that they are able to
decide for their own well being. Education for women has to be emphasised
because it is only through this means that women can become a force in
their own right and be appreciated for their valuable contribution to
family, community and society.

Saraswathy Rajagopal,
Senior Program Coordinator,
Advanced Leadership & Executive Development Centre,
INTAN, Bukit Kiara Campus
Kuala Lumpur
Tel: 603-2506838/2506843
Fax:  "  2534135/3810354
E mail: [EMAIL PROTECTED]




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