Graham, 

Very cool online sticky notes at diigo.  Thanks for introducing it to me.  

I was spelling out numbers ten and under except at the beginning of a
sentence, but I agree, its probably a country-specific matter.  

You are correct about "Vietnam."  Interestingly, our colleague from there
spelled the city as "Ha Noi," but that appears to be westernized to "Hanoi"
in North America and Europe.  Don't know about France, though, because Hà
Nội is the transliteration I see in Wikipedia.  

The placement of the URLs ahead of the link is an interesting artifact of
embedded links here.  Compare with the version in 
http://plonemetrics.blogspot.com/2008/11/world-plone-day-after-action-report.html
my blog  to see what I thought would appear.  You are correct, though, in
that they should be true hyperlinks or else parenthetical after the term in
question.  

Along those lines (and I've seen it suggested elsewhere in the Plone
marketing notes), we should have an elevator speech for each sector-specific
category--business, education, science, government, NGOs, etc.  In most
cases I just linked to the appropriate support forum.  Plonegov.org is a
great example of what we should aspire to for each of these sectors.

Your other edits are all well considered and I would recommend anyone using
this release to make those changes.  Some of the improvements you suggest
are to text copied directly from plone.org.  I suggest that the marketing
community look into reflecting those enhancements back into the core
material.  

I, too, am not one who writes press releases and in fact don't have a clear
idea of what the next step is.  Hopefully Nate or Mark or someone else
knowledgeable will come to our rescue.  :-)

Cheers,

Karl


Graham Perrin wrote:
> 
> Hi ... suggestions in sticky notes at 
> <http://www.diigo.com/annotated/9fdb698e2696b74ab86f2c4468a316a7>. 
> 
> Where I have highlighted the numbers, some of the numbers below 100 might
> expressed as words, so for example 
> 
>> Forty of the sixty-one
> 
> but for sure, the grammatical rules may vary from country to country etc.
> so that's a very minor point. 
> 
> I don't do press releases but to me it does read nicely :)
> 
> Kind regards
> Graham
> 

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