Raymond E. Feist <[email protected]> writes
Jack felt panic for the first time in his life when he heard the
gunshot boom, but a moment later he realized it had come from behind
him. He saw the man who had just pointed his revolver at him falling
forward, his blank eyes highlighting the masked of surprise that had
been his last thought. Jack spun and saw the stranger there, putting
his guy away as he glanced at Jack with an expression that said he knew
something that Jack didn't know, such as who was that man who had just
tried to kill him and why.
OK, so that's 90 seconds off the top of my head, but the point here is
that you have to hit the ground running in such a way as the reader
instantly wants to know what's going on and sticks around to find out.
It doesn't have to be an action scene. Jack looked up from his book to
take a sip of his Cafe Americano and saw the man in the tweed jacked.
It felt as he was almost a friend, despite the two men never having
spoken. But for over a month now, neither man's routine had varied:
Jack arrived at the coffee shop at 7:15 for a half-hour to read the
paper and enjoy a decent coffee before the endless cups of bad instant
at the office that would punctuate the morning, and the man in the
tweed coat arrived at 7:30; Jack could set his watch by it. With
slight amusement Jack noticed the man repeated the same order he had
every morning since Jack had first noticed him. Jack had it memorized:
a small espresso, a sesame seed bagel with cream cheese, and a danish
in a bag to go. Jack considered the oddity of lives passing so closely,
but never really touching, and was about to return to his paper, when
he noticed another man, large and looking out of place in his
particular shop, moving to stand behind the tweed coated man, brushing
against him as he put something in the pocket of the man's coat. A
muffled "sorry" and he was off with the man in tweed muttering "no
worries" and returning to his order.
Now, in that example (which probably needs a decent rewrite) when the
man in the tweed jacket shows up dead before the end of chapter one,
Jack's off on an adventure.
So are you going to finish the story tonight, or do we have to wait till
bedtime tomorrow :)
Have to say if that was on the back of a book, I would probably buy it
to find out more.
--
John
The Official Raymond E Feist Website
http://www.crydee.com/
Books to read, and shelves to fill,
Ray's great books, just fit the bill.
