Tat wrote:

 > When your time on this earth is over, your children
 > won't remember your accumulated garbage - let them remember the warm 
imprint
 > of your arms enfolded around them.


Since I have all of my mom's things to deal with, this is something I
have thought about.

The good side of having her things:
There are things that Mom kept I am grateful for.
Her mother's beauty school student card, a letter she wrote to me when I
was young (haven't read that one yet), a pillow case she machine
embroidered for me in grade school to name a few.

There are things that I know I will enjoy.  Mom and I shared a love of
knitting and sewing - I will find much joy in creating clothes from some
of her fabric and yarn.  I hope that there are 3 of the pictures she
painted while I was in high school me and my siblings can each have one. 
  As I go through her things, I am sure there are other things that will 
bring add value to my life or to the lives of family and friends.

The bad side of having her things:
Mom left tons of stuff, I really wish there was less.  Sometimes I am
irritated at her for leaving me so much stuff to deal with.  Sometimes I
am irritated at myself that I wasn't ready to begin dealing with her
things right after her funeral when my brother and sister-in-law could
have helped me and irritated at myself that I am not able to accept help
from others.  Because of the finality of deciding what to do with her 
things, it makes deciding what to do with my own things look easy.

Mom spent the last couple of years before her death decluttering - 2 
years was not long enough to undo 68 years of being a packrat.  I think 
that if she had a couple more years, I think she would have left things 
that we would be happy to have while leaving me less stuff to make 
decisions about.

As I declutter my own things, I will keep in mind my feelings about the 
things Mom.  I don't want someone to have to wade through clutter I 
left.  I also don't want people wishing I hadn't thrown away things that 
would have added value to their life.

Joanne

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