We are friends here. And we are human. We should not expect our friends to be perfect (might not be our friends if they were). Certainly we are not perfect. In fact, on this list we value characters. It keeps the list from getting boring.
As friends, we ought to be able to agree to disagree agreeably. When someone writes something wrong, inappropriate, or stupid, we should be able to ask them to stop or respond without launching into personal attacks. Criticize the conduct, not the person. We are not binary (approve-hate-approve-hate). We are analogue. Start with the mildest reproach you can and, if necessary, ramp up. Nuclear bombs should not be the first weapons of choice. Also, on the other end, if someone disapproves of what you have written, don't let a lack of diplomacy rile you up. A phrase from my old football coach comes to mind, "Boys, when they chew my ass, they just get scar tissue. I've been chewed by a lot tougher people than them." Besides, I want to be able to ask stupid questions and post stupid answers. Sometimes on this list a stupid question gets a truly brilliant answer. Now a personal story. My best friend and the fellow who introduced me to offshore cruising had political views that on the surface were diametrically opposed to mine. When we cruised together I loved to accuse him of being to the right of Attila the Hun. He, of course, would accuse me of being a pinko commie. We enjoyed this banter and found that after a few beers or a bottle of wine our basic values were quite close. We never expected to convince the other of the errors of his thinking. And we enjoyed acting astonished at the ignorance and audacity of each other. But we were friends, sailing friends, and we would have done anything for each other. I am not suggesting that we encourage political discussions on the list. I am suggesting that when someone does write an e-mail that you think crosses the line, either ignore it and move on (when you stir cow patties they begin to smell) or write to the person off-list asking (not ordering) them to stop. And, if you are asked to stop a line of discussion, please seriously consider complying even if you don't see how it was offensive. We are all sensitive about certain topics. Try to avoid stepping on people's toes and then criticizing them for having too big of feet. Lee Huddleston s/v Truelove _______________________________________________ Liveaboard mailing list [email protected] To adjust your membership settings over the web http://liveaboardonline.com/mailman/listinfo/liveaboard To subscribe send an email to [email protected] To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] The archives are at http://www.liveaboardonline.com/pipermail/liveaboard/ To search the archives http://www.mail-archive.com/[email protected] The Mailman Users Guide can be found here http://www.gnu.org/software/mailman/mailman-member/index.html
