I agree completely about fidelity. For some, a dip in another pool provides
added excitement...but for me, it cracks the foundation of the love I have,
irreparably, no matter which person is to blame. Trust is key for me, and
without faithfulness, there is no trust.
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It must be Chris being that you posted twice on it, lol, thanks.
I might add that much of my feelings at this point are based on the
fact that she is without exception my best friend in the world. The
monogamy issue for me is moot as I would hurt as much as she would,
and mutually so. I guess in that sense the love factor reveals itself
to be the core driven emotion that keeps us together. When that
emotion is present, the thought of infidelity never enters the mind.
Love, being faithful, gives relationships integrity and provides a
sound platform on which to continue building. Newly founded
relationships or marriages are like a complete white circle that
accumulates black spots for each little transgression, larger spots
for more serious infractions. As time goes by the circle may seem
more black than white and the imbalance weighs heavier on the side of
failure due to the loss of integrity, eventually with nothing left the
relationship collapses. We can fantasize all we want about how much
greener the grass is on the other side but truth is it takes mutual
effort no matter where the grass is. I would venture to guess that
there is that one perfect soul mate relationship out there waiting for
us to find it, that being the hardest part of it all.
On Apr 29, 11:45 pm, Chris Jenkins <[email protected]> wrote:
> I think this is my favorite post from you ever, Slip.
>
>
>
> [ Attached Message ]From:Slip Disc <[email protected]>To:"\"Minds Eye\""
> <[email protected]>Date:Wed, 29 Apr 2009 21:24:10 -0700
> (PDT)Local:Wed, Apr 29 2009 11:24 pmSubject:[Mind's Eye] Re: What is the
> nature of Love?
>
> I don't know that I could identify with true love anymore, not in the
> way I did 40 years ago when the heart was expendable for the sake of
> the other, when self didn't matter and all the other feelings we have
> when "Love" takes over. Sometimes I wish I could have been more the
> way I am today back then as it would have saved many of my hearts and
> dollars. Now I could care less for it, though I do have some spurts
> of it. Considering that I've told my wife several times that upon
> winning the big lotto I would set her up with whatever she wanted and
> that I was chao chao bambino, whether I would follow through with that
> is another story, I may never want to leave her. I do have a great
> deal of love for her and I do call it love but it's not what it should
> be I guess, not sure. She is a great woman in a lot of ways, I will
> take care of her the best I can and protect her from anyone intending
> harm of any sort and kill if I had to, maybe that is the instinctive
> male in me, I don't do Ghandi. I still lust after women in the public
> arena who flaunt their sensuality and camo their wily ways. However I
> couldn't imagine having a relationship with them beyond patronizing
> passion and sometimes wonder if love is that thing in my mind or that
> thing in my pants. There are those that reveal a true sense of
> sincerity beyond the physical and are as you say most worthy of true
> love, but as you know, they can change.
> These days I just simply say, My Love, whatever my capacity is to
> love, that is how much I am capable of loving and you have all the
> love I am capable of.
>
> .......and no matter how many women I sleep with I always come home to
> you, Darlin!<<<Joke, Joke
>
> On Apr 29, 9:31 pm, Chris Jenkins <[email protected]> wrote:> And
> no,this isn't a wide open generic question. I'm not interested in agape here,
> this is strictly for eros.
>
> > I'm a hopeless romantic and serial monogamist. I fall in love hard and
> > quickly if I find someone worthy of such, put my all Into maintaining long
> > term romantic relationships, despite my personal challenges, and against
> > all logic remain a believer in the concept of a happily ever after
> > relationship despite a spotty relationship record and a generally rational
> > to cynical worldview on every other topic. Love is such a basic human
> > instinct to me.
>
> > Perspectives on Love vary drastically though, and I've heard a surprisingly
> > diverse number of them recently. So, I'm putting the question out to each
> > of you, not as a debate, but as an invitation to expound what your
> > perception of the nature of Love is, in your life. There are no wrong
> > answers, so have at it.
>
>
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