I am sorry about your cousin- hope you could help her- or she found peace or adventure.//Adultery was not an issue in either marriage/ divorce. I was the one who called it a day. I think ten years is my limit for marriage. If you can't work things out by then, give it up.// I am the one who gave you a "star" because you sounded sweet and sincere.//I am responding because I see Ernest Hemingway's grandson has re-edited "A Moveable Feast" to rescue his grandmother- NYTimes/ Books. Interesting. And why I burn things I write or am sent. And pertinent because Hemingway committed suicide, I suppose. He hunted himself, perhaps.//I don't agree that children are helpful- maybe one of my four "gets it"- my second son- we are very close in personality. The others have constructed their own myths and are busy raising their families which is as it should be.// My initial comment arose as a reaction to comments of my daughter and two subsequent e-mails- never under-estimate the lunges of English majors when it comes to fencing the language!// I have also left long time "friendships" this year. No, I don't miss them.In fact, I am relieved. But unplaced at the moment. And realism often looks like bitterness but is not.
On Jun 26, 7:17�pm, L <[email protected]> wrote: > I can understand.<=( �My cousin went through two marriges herself: one > with a guy who was a scum bag and treated her like his maid and abused > her, the other with a guy who couldn't handle being a father to her > kids and he ended up cheating on her. �So, I can understand the some > of the bitterness you feel. �And yes; men can be stupid. �Like I > explained in my previous entry, if your a kid who wants to have > adventure and all that than you shouldn't have children, and, in my > oppinion, not even get married. �Because real marriage is about team > work, the husband and wife must work together to form a unity amongst > themselves, an understanding, and compromise. �It can't be "it's my > way or the high way." �The two must COMPROMISE. �When people get > married, they know this (or at least, I'd hope they'd know this), and > are willing to WORK THINGS OUT. �They marry because they love each > other, faults included, and they are willing to go through the > hardships of life with one another and support each other. �THAT, in > my oppinion, is how marriage should be, although it's probably easier > said than done, but at least you try. > > Hun, I am terribly sorry for the crummy husbands you had before, and I > understand that it's hard to raise kids. �You have to be strong for > them, you have to provide a good example for them, and you must take > care of them. �And I understand how it's hard not to buckle under the > pressure and just cry your eyes out. �Life dishes us a hard hand > sometimes, and honestly, (I know I'm complaining, but still) it's not > fair, and it's not. �Hun.......you want to know the best quality of a > woman? �Women are usually strong. �Through the years women have > married men who they thought they loved them, but were left with their > children and stuck with the difficulty of raising them. �It was hard > for them, no doubt, by the managed to continue on. �There are times > when I wonder, "how can they do that when so much bad happened to > them?" �They are strong, independent, beautiful, proud women. �They > pick themselves up when the things around them {jobs, sexist men (no > offense guys), nagging snooty mothers, etc} bring them to their > knees. � The amazing strength of women........it never ceases to > astound me.^__^ > > Hun, you are strong, no matter what anyone says, to have come this > far. �I'm proud, and others should be proud to. �And if they're not, > then let me be the first to say at least that. �Keep going, your doing > a fantastic job, and try not to let that bitterness consume you; > you'll loose the best qualities within yourself and let them win. > Smile, show them you're happy how you are (your personality, your > life, everything), and look at them with strong eyes that say, "I can > make it without you." ^__^ > > P.S. �If you ever need help, ask someone here and I'm sure they'll aid > you; most people are nice > P.S.S. �When you are ready, and you might never be, but that's ok, try > to find someone again. �Except take your time, find someone you can > trust, shares your same interests, and someone you deem is kind. �Make > it a little hard for them; if they truly want you, then they'll make > that effort to get you. �Also, look at the person's family. �If they > seem nice, chances are that's how he's going to be. > P.S.S.S. �If you want, let your kids know you're going through a > little bit of a tough time and ask them to help out a little (kids > aren't dumb; they know when something's wrong, even if they don't know > what it is. �If you let them know then they'll want to help you > because they enjoy feeling needed and important). > P.S.S.S.S. �Sorry if I sound like a shrink.^__^ �Hahahaha!! �I'm not > trying to be, but I know I can sound like one sometimes. �Sorry again. > On Jun 25, 1:50�pm, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > I was driven into marriage- twice- so I am pretty bitchy about the > > subject- since I really never had to marry at all. I don't think men > > and women are equal. Men can move along. Women must be the good mother > > and nurture their children. Provide an example- blah-blah blah. It's > > biology or the lessons from lions. > > > On Jun 25, 1:21 am, L <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > i don't believe that. in this society i believe both men and women > > > are equal, and the gift of life cannot exist without one or the > > > other. as for children, it's true; if you're a young kid looking for > > > fun and adventure, or still searching for your dreams and destiny in > > > life then children can be a burden on you. that's why you shouldn't > > > have unsafe sex at that age unless you're ok to go through that (at > > > that point, you're screwing up yours and the child's life, so have > > > fun, unless you're ok with that too). however, if you've gone through > > > life, done some good stuff, and met a nice man or woman, then you > > > should settle down and have a few kids (or not, there's no shame in > > > getting married and just staying that way). having kids is a nice > > > opportunity to pass on your memory, your wisdom, and your legacy. > > > they are a piece of you. a way to continue your existence. > > > > On Jun 20, 4:56 am, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > A habit of poets. A boost to book sales and theories. Women might as > > > > well throw themselves over the cliff after 30. The world belongs to > > > > men. Children are sandbags to a woman's dream.- Hide quoted text - > > > > - Show quoted text -- Hide quoted text - > > > - Show quoted text -- Hide quoted text - > > - Show quoted text - --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups ""Minds Eye"" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [email protected] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/Minds-Eye?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
