Wow, Fran, your spirit lit up the words !

Indeed.  Care for the elderly in the family should be a part of our
living tradition, as it is ( still ) in several societies. In our
tradition here, it is referred to as ' Pitr Rin '  or  ' indebtedness
to our fathers / ancestors.'  The understanding is :  We 've already
taken so much from our parents, teachers and other elders, that the
debt cannot be repaid ...  hence, we must each do all we must.

On Jul 16, 8:34 pm, frantheman <[email protected]> wrote:
> I think you're raising the right questions here, Molly. I've been
> working in geriatric and long-term intensive nursing (including many
> PVS people) for twenty years now and the issues are very complex. I'm
> saddened by the blanket condemnation of medical and care workers which
> frequently occours in this sort of discussion, while having become so
> resigned to it that I often just don't bother to contradict. The vast
> majority of those working in this area are highly-motivated, badly-
> paid professionals, who are working their asses off, round the clock,
> seven days a week to try to enable people in the last stages of their
> lives to experience the diginity which is their due. That they often
> don't succeed has more to do with the conditions under which they work
> - the priorities set by the socieities in which we live. The costs
> arguments sicken me, because they are, generally, a societal cop-out.
> Yes, it costs a lot to provide adequate, diginified care for the
> demented and senile, the multi-morbid and terminally ill, much more
> than our societies are prepared to pay. And yes, in our generally
> aging western socities, these costs are going to increase in the
> future. But the crocodile tears shed by those who dolefully proclaim
> that we cannot afford to provide all that is necessary and that we are
> going to have to more agressively triage are deeply hypocritical.
>
> Our western societies are, in terms of per capita productivity, the
> richest that have ever existed. Providing adequate medical and nursing
> care is economically possible, if we are prepared to make the decision
> to do it. It is, economically seen, a far more productive area than
> the military-industrial complex (whose basic purpose is to literally
> pulverise created wealth) and, even in terms of national economies,
> investment in this area has huge positive aspects, as it involves
> retaining resources largely within the regions involved, creating and
> sustaining sustainable jobs, distributing wealth and resources within
> the economy - even in terms relating to transfers from the old to the
> young. Too many old people do not allow themselves the care they need
> and could afford, because this would diminish the capital inherited by
> their offspring (who are frequently not able or prepared to carry out
> this care themselves). For many complex reasons, the development of
> our societies in the past hundred years or so has led to the breakdown
> of old generational compacts - and the most we have developed to
> replace them is a brutal economisation and monetarisation of all
> aspects of human life.
>
> If we were to accept these challenges, then the issue of assisted
> suicides would, I believe, diminish somewhat. I am extremely sceptical
> of groups like "Dignitas", seeing the thin end of a wedge here,
> potentially open to exploitation by the cold-eyed actuaries and
> accountants running our health insurance companies. From here it is no
> large step to some Soylent Green scenarios. There are many dangerous
> ideas lurking here, including a major defining one in our society,
> which identifies human worth with the concept of economic
> productivity.
>
> People can and should die with dignity. I have been present at many
> deaths (none of them in any way assisted other than, in some cases, by
> discontinuation of pointless meds) and, in most cases, have
> experienced such events as a great privilege. Death is the culmination
> of life, its last, ultimate stage. In the vast majority of cases it is
> well capable of coming on its own, without any outside help. Issues
> such as bed-sores are completely avoidable, given adequate,
> professional care. We should be less worried about seeing dementia as
> a catastrophic loss of human dignity and more concerned with giving
> those suffering from it the support necessary to go on living
> dignified lives within their illness until they are able to accept and
> embrace death. Because, then it inevitably comes and it is something
> deeply beautiful.
>
> Francis
>
> On 16 Jul., 15:12, Molly Brogan <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>
>
> > I am appalled at our level of blame here.  Currently in the US, we
> > have the ability to choose or not choose the medical model.  No one is
> > forcing us to go to the doctor.  Also, Hospice care is available to
> > everyone and free to Medicare recipients.  The Hospice protocol is to
> > get rid of the meds and patients often see a rebound in health
> > afterward.  It does not stop the end from coming.  Trust in families
> > is an age old problem and I suppose, begins with us.  We spend a life
> > time developing our relationships, and if they are not based on trust,
> > what can we expect in the end?  Often, those left with all of the work
> > and responsibility of caring for the aged and dying in their families
> > are blamed for a reduction of assets.  Not sure what they expect it to
> > cost.  Because we never really know when the end is near, how do we
> > make the call about selling a home etc,.?  More often than not, the
> > bickering about assets of the deceased is sour grapes.
>
> > In the end, I think that if we have led a life of dignity, our death
> > with dignity will follow.  This is not always the case for reasons
> > unexplained.  Can we have faith our death is what we need it to be, no
> > matter how it appears outwardly?  I think the issue of paid suicide is
> > much more complicated than the abortion issue, where the mother is the
> > decision maker and has rights in that she is pregnant and will
> > deliver.  Alzheimer's patients would not have the cognitive ability to
> > make the decision to suicide.  Should someone have the right to make
> > that for them?  How about people with cognative disabilities?  Should
> > we only keep them around if someone can afford to pay for their care?
>
> > On Jul 16, 8:48 am, Slip Disc <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > > Highly possible that Kevorkian presented a threat to the medical and
> > > more so the giant pharmaceutical industry.  They would probably topple
> > > if terminally ill and elderly people decided to check out and skip the
> > > med bandwagon.  It goes to show "again" how much power corporate
> > > lobbyists have on government, it's like a choke collar on a pit bull
> > > and as usually the people are the puppets and pawns in the money
> > > making game.  The one drug that people can grow in their yards of
> > > course is illegal, they can't allow self medication that doesn't bring
> > > in revenue.
>
> > > On Jul 16, 5:47 am, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > > > There comes a point of no return but do not think my mother ever
> > > > considered suicide to end her suffering. Strong willed, was she.//Your
> > > > post was interesting- perhaps Kevorkian was a threat to the medical
> > > > profession and the lucrative nursing home industry- plus the attendant
> > > > bureaucracies of the courts and social services. There is a case in my
> > > > local news where the daughter embezzled her mother's fortune via power
> > > > of attorney which is shameful- so family isn't always the answer,
> > > > either- neither are shady court appointed guardians.//This whole
> > > > business is going to get interesting as Social Security peters out and
> > > > the government must decide/ration health care costs- they could kill
> > > > one old bird with two stones.// What these new approaches may hasten
> > > > is a vigorous objection from active, healthy seniors who refuse to
> > > > submit to ageism and elder abuse and treasure their final years on
> > > > their own terms because they can and have earned the right to them.
> > > > Our society is youth oriented so it won't be easy. I find myself
> > > > looking at the images of middle aged to senior men and women and find
> > > > they are often stereotyped which is ridiculous and insulting. On the
> > > > other hand, you have Gloria Vanderbilt's new book "Obsession" which is
> > > > her Marquis de Sade experiment in elder-lust- she is 85! lol Poor
> > > > little Gloria- smutty at last!
>
> > > > On Jul 16, 1:07 am, Slip Disc <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > > > > We put our pets down when they are no longer able to walk and function
> > > > > in their old age but we insanely subject ourselves to the aches of
> > > > > aging, the bed sores and agonizing pain that haunt our every conscious
> > > > > minute. I never did understand the Kevorkian problem, it's not like
> > > > > the people did not want to check out. I would think that early
> > > > > religious ideals embedded within the fabric of the country still have
> > > > > a grip on the acceptability of suicide, notions of good and bad forced
> > > > > upon the people regardless of their personal beliefs. As you pointed
> > > > > out, the idea that abortion is a acceptable practice is dumbfounding,
> > > > > where does the choice of life or death lie in that? It is all about
> > > > > political ownership of life. We develop lousy governments to boss us
> > > > > around.
>
> > > > > On Jul 15, 2:29 pm, rigsy03 <[email protected]> wrote:
>
> > > > > >http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/15/world/europe/15britain.html
>
> > > > > > With a swoon of Prokofiev! Read the reader comments as well as
> > > > > > Americans may be waking up to the fraud that is end of life care 
> > > > > > and a
> > > > > > national disgrace.- Hide quoted text -
>
> > > > > - Show quoted text -- Hide quoted text -
>
> - Show quoted text -
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