Dana, this was so clearly articulated and beautifully written! Would you give permission for people to forward and post it publicly? I feel it important to ask, as we want this to be a safe place, even if the archives are searchable.
--jh-- On Wed, Mar 15, 2023 at 12:23 PM Dana Dwinell-Yardley via Organizers < [email protected]> wrote: > One more soap bubble for the soap box! > > We also take a step toward inclusion when we are kind, patient, and > supportive of each other while we learn new things: whether that's learning > how to balance and swing, or learning how to use new pronouns for someone. > It's gonna be awkward at first! That's how learning works! We'll just keep > practicing and improving together. > > Dana > > On Wed, Mar 15, 2023, 12:02 PM Mary Collins <[email protected]> wrote: > >> Dana, >> >> Thank you. Well said and I am sharing with my very conservative board. >> I think they need a wake up call, forgive me but "either shit or get off >> the pot". If we really want our dance to continue we need to address this. >> >> I hope for a better tomorrow for all of us no matter the walk we choose. >> >> Blessings, >> Mary "from Buffalo" not. >> "And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who >> couldn't hear the music." - Nietzsche >> >> “Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass ... it's about learning >> to dance in the rain!” ~ unknown >> >> >> On Wed, Mar 15, 2023 at 11:21 AM Dana Dwinell-Yardley via Organizers < >> [email protected]> wrote: >> >>> Hi all, >>> >>> I'm going to explore this intersection of gender-free role terms + >>> welcoming new dancers + growing community a little bit. [And by "a little >>> bit" I actually mean a "a long soapbox about important stuff," so hang on >>> for the ride.] >>> >>> I'm a genderqueer / gender nonconforming person, and a huge part of my >>> folk community includes transgender, nonbinary, and other gender >>> nonconforming folks. If you haven't been paying much attention to the news, >>> let me tell you: The political and social climate around gender and >>> sexuality in the United States right now is *terrifying* for LGBTQ+ folks. >>> Twenty-three states introduced laws in 2022 that infringe or attack the >>> basic rights of transgender and queer people, and more than 13 of those >>> bills have become law. There is a ton of hatred, fear, and violence being >>> directed toward the queer and trans community, especially youth, even in >>> liberal states like Vermont (where I live). >>> >>> All this is to say — it's a hard and scary time to be a queer person. >>> And our dance communities have the potential to be places of radical >>> inclusion, expansiveness, safety, and welcome in a violent world that seeks >>> to deny us our basic right to exist. >>> >>> - When a dance uses gender-free terms, that is a step toward that >>> radical inclusion. >>> - When dancers are comfortable and happy to dance with any person in >>> any role, that's another step. (For example, if you've got a lot of men >>> who >>> show obvious discomfort at swinging anyone who's not a woman, the dancing >>> is likely to feel icky and unsafe to trans & nonbinary folks or anyone >>> swapping roles, regardless of terms used.) >>> - When we take the time to explain our dance culture as well as the >>> basic moves, that's another step. >>> - When we offer nametags with a place to write in pronouns, that's >>> another step. >>> - When we offer a sliding scale to make our dance accessible to >>> folks of all income levels, that's another step. >>> - When people can see themselves reflected in the organizing >>> committee members (i.e. diversity of age, gender, class background, race, >>> etc), in a way that's actually sharing the work and not tokenizing >>> people, >>> that's another step. >>> - When long-time dancers ask newcomers to dance in a friendly but >>> not pushy way, and we normalize saying no as well as saying yes, that's >>> another step. >>> - When we normalize giving and receiving feedback about the way our >>> dancing affects others, that's another step. (i.e. "hey, will you grab my >>> hand less tightly? that hurts." "oh! thanks for telling me! is that >>> better?) >>> - When we are transparent about why we're doing what we're doing >>> (i.e. our values, like Julian suggested), that's another step. When I get >>> up to give announcements, for example, I thank people for helping to make >>> the dance welcoming and inclusive, and I speak about our sliding scale, >>> our >>> name buttons, our role terms, and wearing masks all as pathways to a more >>> inclusive and welcoming space, as ways that we care for one another. >>> - (Right now, I am still inclined to think that wearing masks is >>> another way that we create spaces of radical inclusion and safety, >>> especially for folks at higher risk for COVID, but that's a whole other >>> kettle of fish.) >>> >>> On the flip side: If a dance uses gendered role terms, or when >>> organizers say things like "ugh I don't like Robins & Larks," or "I don't >>> want to push the issue," what I hear is: >>> "we don't care about you," >>> "we don't think transgender or nonbinary people exist," or >>> "you're causing problems for us just by being yourself." >>> OUCH. >>> >>> I would gently offer that there is no such thing as a non-political >>> space. Everything is political, even though you may not have noticed >>> because the politics weren't affecting you and you were comfortable because >>> the current setup worked for you. This is a country where people are >>> actively passing laws that harm transgender and queer people. Choosing NOT >>> to do something is also a political act. >>> >>> We set our dance culture together. People will notice the vibes more >>> than you think. Let's keep striving toward spaces that are deeply >>> welcoming, growthful, and joyful for everyone! This is part of why I am >>> called to keep organizing dances: because I can see the power in creating a >>> community that exists a little bit outside of space and time for a moment, >>> a community where we get to see the kind of joy, connection, collaboration, >>> and care that we dream of for society at large. What a delightful, magical >>> thing. >>> >>> Yours in building joyful, inclusive dance community, >>> Dana >>> Montpelier, VT >>> >>> >>> On Wed, Mar 15, 2023 at 8:53 AM Julian Blechner via Organizers < >>> [email protected]> wrote: >>> >>>> Lots of good suggestions from a lot of people. >>>> >>>> I think I can boil down success keeping new dancers to: >>>> 1. Listen to youth, put then on your committee, and implement their >>>> suggestions. >>>> 2. Have a written values statement, which all of your other policies >>>> follow. >>>> 3. Make it clear you want to hear from dancers with compliments or >>>> complaints. And actually deal with complaints. Over and over, the biggest >>>> reason I hear people not returning (other than just not liking the dance >>>> form) is unhandled and ignored complaints. >>>> >>>> In dance, >>>> Julian Blechner >>>> >>>> On Wed, Mar 15, 2023, 8:10 AM Chrissy Fowler via Organizers < >>>> [email protected]> wrote: >>>> >>>>> *“Getting back to the subject of repeat visitors, perhaps the biggest >>>>> difference of all is a caller who brings the fun and the inclusiveness, >>>>> the >>>>> type who can laugh with you when something goes goofy. (… . ) I'm >>>>> tremendously grateful to everyone organizing contra dances, and to all the >>>>> people trying to make their dance a little bit better each week.* >>>>> *Lex Spoon”* >>>>> >>>>> Hear, hear! >>>>> >>>>> (And I think it’s also the organizers who can bring that fun and >>>>> inclusiveness and set the tone for embracing the goofiness.) Let’s face >>>>> it, >>>>> even though some folks forget and take it all a bit too seriously, these >>>>> dances we love are *incredibly* weird. Beautifully so, but definitely >>>>> on the silly side of joy. >>>>> >>>>> I’m also grateful for all you folks sharing ideas and experiences >>>>> openly and nonjudgmentally. What a gift! >>>>> >>>>> Chrissy Fowler >>>>> Belfast Maine >>>>> *Where we are digging out from the latest nor’easter (ah the joys of >>>>> finally getting winter weather in March)* >>>>> _______________________________________________ >>>>> Organizers mailing list -- [email protected] >>>>> To unsubscribe send an email to >>>>> [email protected] >>>>> >>>> _______________________________________________ >>>> Organizers mailing list -- [email protected] >>>> To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] >>>> >>> >>> >>> -- >>> Dana Dwinell-Yardley >>> pronouns: she/her/hers >>> 802-505-6639 >>> Montpelier, Vermont >>> _______________________________________________ >>> Organizers mailing list -- [email protected] >>> To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] >>> >> _______________________________________________ > Organizers mailing list -- [email protected] > To unsubscribe send an email to [email protected] >
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