"I do love you." Derek told her in exasperation. "And realize that there may not have been anyway for me to know that she would break like she did. But I am not blameless here. There are things you don't know. For one, I was the one who initiated our relationship, not Megan. And I did encourage it. I even flew to France to be with her once. No I am not responsible for what she did, but I did lead her on, though I'll admit I didn't think that what I was doing at the time."
"I didn't say you didn't love me, Derek." Julia said, looking into her hands and hearing what he said before closing her eyes. Oh yeah, this was just what she wanted to hear, she thought numbly, remembering what Megan had said about death, feelings and moving on. "Because you thought you were starting over with her?" she asked, only to look out at the parking lot and the cars around them. What a place to have this talk. "Yes. No, that isn't it. I was trying to, but I couldn't. I couldn't just leave you in the past." He stopped and ran his hands through his hair. How as he supposed to explain this when he didn't fully comprehend it himself? "I cared for Megan, but I never loved her. She did love me, at least she told me she did and when that happened, I wasn't able to respond, because I KNEW I didn't love her, not the way she wanted me to at any rate. Not the way she needed me to. I realize I should have broken things off then, I even knew it at the time, but I didn't do it. I can't explain why Julia, because I don't really know. I'm not telling you this to hurt you, I never wish to do that. But you have a right to know."
